Page 166 of Paradox
"You thinking about me. About me using a… Remember in the truck this morning?"
"I do."
"So will you tell me?"
"What do you wanna know?"
"Eden," I whine at the smug look on his face. I try to sit up but he pulls me tighter to his chest.
"The first time was last Christmas. Before Shawn came to stay. D'you remember the night we played UNO?"
"You mean when you cheated?"
"I didn't cheat."
"You can't stack plus cards."
"You can if everyone agrees."
"I didn't agree."
"You came in part way through. It wasn't up to me to tell you. You should have asked."
"But I've never played that way. How would I know to ask?"
"You're gonna make me hard again."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"It was after midnight, I was about ten beers deep, and your pissed off little face was turning me the fuck on."
"You were horrible to me."
I feel Eden shift behind me. "The more you reacted, the harder I got."
"You kept staring at me."
Eden digs his fingers into my inner thighs and forces my legs apart. "I kept imagining myself balls deep in your ass. And that made me mad."
"I wanted to hurt you so bad."
He drags his hand down the inside of my leg until he's rubbing me through my pants. Slow. Not enough to get me anywhere, but more than enough to drive me crazy. "I wish you had."
"What was I meant to do? Tek was there."
"He was more drunk than I was. I don't think he'd have noticed if you walked around to the other side of the coffee table and sat yourself in my lap."
I arch my back and grind against him. "And what would you have done if I did?"
"Jin." His breath is like fire as he exhales by my ear.
"If you already hated me. If me just being there made you so mad… What would you have done if I sat in your lap?"
I try to reach behind myself so I can rub Eden, too, but he harshly throws my hand away then forces his way into my pants. With his fingers wrapped around my shaft he tells me, "I'd have fucking killed you," and starts pumping me slowly.
"I thought about you that night."
He falters, his grip tightening. "Don't you dare lie to me."
