Page 93 of This Blood that Bonds Us
All the football games. All the parties. They were there patiently waiting for us. There were close-ups of my brother’s faces. Kim and Aaron in his room. Thane and me playing video games. So many of Zach and Luke. Like they were obsessed with the backs of their heads.
I stopped on one that differed from the others with a regal wallpaper I didn’t recognize. Luke and Zach were in black suits talking to one another.
I almost didn’t recognize them with their cropped hair. Luke’s eyes were hollow. He looked like someone kept him in a basement for five years. And Zach . . . had a lifeless stare that made me drop the picture.
I sucked in a breath. The Family knew where I was. They knew what I was doing. They were waiting for me. That reality had never been clearer.
It was bad.Bad Presley!
I had to stop. They may have known the general location we were in, but as long as I wasn’t tracked, they wouldn’t find my family. Luke and Zach would be so pissed off at me for putting everyone in danger while I played detective. They’d given upeverything to keep us safe, and I’d led The Family right back to us.
They were obsessed with us. Suddenly, I didn’t feel like pretending I was an action-adventure hero. I wanted to run away and hide. The intimacy of the photos and the feeling of dread was plastered in my mind. The anger and sadness on my brothers’ faces . . .
They wouldn’t give up until they had us all.
It was dark by the time I left the cave. Up ahead, there was a star. Burning brighter than any other. I reached up, wanting to touch it and transport there. Something about the light made me feel like . . . like it would make this burning, throbbing, aching feeling in my chest stop. So I started walking.
I kept my eyes on the sky and let that invisible string pull me into the night until I wasn’t walking anymore. I was running. Faster and faster toward that light. It was there. I swear I felt lighter.
What was this feeling?
Was it them?
Was it Her?
Whatever it was, I needed it. The closer I got, the more it eased the pain in my chest.
Then I was standing in the dark, in the cold . . . alone.
It wasn’t a cosmic revelation to feel alone, but it was for me.
It wasn’t fair that they got all the responsibility because they were born first. They’d done everything for me, and I’d done nothing. How was I supposed to deal with that?
Getting older sucks.
Crumbling into the snow, the tears assaulted me until I was sobbing into my hands. It made my chest hurt worse, but it felt good to let everything fall out of me.
It would have been easier to make my brothers the villains in their story, kind of like Aaron did at first, but they weren’t thevillains in my story, not in this lifetime or any other. My brothers were both heroes in my book. They’d fought their fate with everything they had.
The pain in my chest throbbed out of control. It was the only connection I had left to them. When I didn’t feel it, it scared me, like maybe one day I wouldn’t feel it anymore.
I didn’t want Mom to tell me everything would be fine. I didn’t want Kimberly to try to fix my problems. I wanted my brother to tell me everything would be okay. I needed a hug that would erase my errors and sins.
Forty
Aaron
After almost an hour of driving, I finally reached the park. Presley had called me sobbing, and I’d replayed his words over and over again as I drove.
“I really need you to come get me.”
All at once, my body went rigid. What hurt him? Who hurt him? And more importantly, what would I do once I found out who?
“What happened? Are you hurt?”
“No. But I need you to come get me right now.”
“Okay we’ll—”
