Page 77 of The Run Home
He gave me a head nod. “Yes, sir.”
Kinsley waved the jewelry box in my line of vision, breaking my death glare at Tatum. “Can I open this now?”
With my head nod, she did, then gasped as she held it up so she could see it in the dim light. “Oh my gosh, I love it!”
I took the two-carat diamond solitaire necklace out of the box and helped her put it on while she held her hair off her neck. I wasn’t letting some lame boy try to impress her by giving herher first diamond. He’d have to bring his A-game to surpass my diamond.
“It’s one of the highest rated diamonds you can get, a true priceless gem, just like you, Kinsley.” Despite Tatum standing right there, I said what I needed to say on the subject that had caused major arguing the last few weeks. “I just want you to go to a college where you’ll thrive and become your best self. You deserve the world, Tink.”
Kinsley let her hair flop back down, her hand already feeling the diamond now lying against her collarbone. There were tears in her eyes. “Thank you, Dad. I love you.”
My ribs ached, hearing her say those three words so easily now. “I love you, too.”
Then she gave me a bone-crushing hug and the kids were off to the bonfire. I looked around for Shae, wishing she could have been there with me, but didn’t see her. I searched for a few more minutes before my brothers pulled me into a conversation that held me up for awhile. By the time I lifted my head again to scan the crowd, the moon was high in the sky and Shae was nowhere to be found.
CHAPTER THIRTY
Shae
I’d rested long enough.Boon was right. These people were my family now and I was grateful for them. I was proud of Kinsley in a way that was different from all the other seniors I taught. I couldn’t bear to put my dress shoes back on my swollen feet, so I abandoned them as I heaved myself out of the chair and slid open the glass door to the back patio. Everyone was down below in the grass, the senior boys making a racket in the corner of the yard like only men with their first taste of testosterone can do.
One voice floated over the sound of the others, much closer and much more feminine.
“I see you managed to knock up another cleat chaser. A black sheep never changes his ways, huh?”
A crawling sense of shame and embarrassment slithered over my skin. I knew that voice. Knew immediately who she was talking about. I melted into the shadows and slipped back into the house. I stared out into the group of people laughing through the sliding glass door, eyes instantly welling with tears as thewords echoed over and over again in my head. It was a poignant reminder that I’d always been the girl on the outside, watching everyone else have fun.
Why was high school repeating itself with the pretty girl talking crap about me. I hadn’t gotten that mean-girl vibe from Cassie, but then again, I didn’t really know her from the few words we exchanged right before the graduation ceremony began. She was slender and blonde and pretty in a dainty way I’d never be, even if I wasn’t pregnant. She had a child with Boon. A whole lifetime of being tied to the man I was falling in love with.
Before I even knew what I was doing, I inelegantly grabbed my shoes off the floor and flew across the house to the front. My bare feet found every rock and pebble between Gigi’s house and mine, but I barely felt it. I just needed to get away. Needed to not feel like this was senior year prom all over again, the cool kids laughing and having a good time while I was being stood up. When I watched Boon leave me behind because he didn’t want to be seen with me.
My house was dark and quiet. Lonely. A safe haven that had been filled with love and laughter again recently with Boon and Kinsley, which only made the silence now that more deafening.
God, I missed my mom.
I bypassed the massage chair and the couch, heading straight for my bed. I sat down on the mattress, intent on having a bit of a pity party but even the sheets smelled like Boon. Standing back up, I ripped them off in a fit that left me out of breath and sobbing. Then I lay down and clutched the maternity pillow he’d bought me to ease my aches and pains to my chest.
“I’m such an idiot,” I said out loud.
Had I been so desperate for a family that I’d made Boon’s actions into something they weren’t? Was I actually just another “cleat chaser” he’d gotten knocked up? Sure, I’d never watched him play professional baseball, but I’d spent years watching himdevelop the skills required to make it in the majors. Had my juvenile crush blinded me from who he really was and what he could actually be in my life? Was his life here with me simply a second-place option now that his baseball career was over?
Tears soaked my pillow, the pain in my chest amplified by the hormones raging through my body. I knew it, but could do nothing to stop it. I ran a hand over my belly, pressing into the little person I’d soon meet. I wanted this little boy so much. Had dreamed of having a big family again to fill the silence in this house. I wanted to believe in the dream of a mom and dad and a baby, just like it had been with my parents growing up, but maybe Boon just wasn’t capable of that.
And if that was the case, better I know now, before I began to rely on him completely.
I must have fallen asleep mid-spiral. My eyes shot open and it was dark and quiet outside. The creak of the wood floor near my door had my ears perking up. Only one person would sneak into my house at night. I slammed my eyes shut, wanting desperately to become invisible. I couldn’t talk to Boon right now. Didn’t want to see him and his earnest face as he tried to convince himself he wanted a life with me.
I would always be Shae Fletcher, the annoying girl next door he felt sorry for.
He crept closer, and I had to force myself to breathe evenly. I felt him lean over me and dust a kiss across my cheek.
“Sleep tight, lovebug,” he whispered.
Then his heat was gone, the scent of his cologne and the faint hint of beer left in the air after he crept out of my bedroom and shut the door. I held off until I was sure he’d gone back to Gigi’s house. Then the tears came again.
When I woke up late the next morning, my cheeks were blotchy and my eyes were swollen. Glasses couldn’t even hide those bags. I looked awful, but I felt even worse. For the baby’ssake, I forced myself to eat a piece of dry toast and sip on a cup of hot tea. Movement out the window caught my attention. Boon was walking across our properties, on his way to my house. This time, I didn’t laugh when the goats spotted him and began to run toward him. His laugh and the increase in his pace didn’t make me shake my head with a smile.
I darted up from my chair and headed for the front door, locking the deadbolt, something I never did. I glanced down at myself, seeing that my feet were dirty and there was a bit of dried blood on my big toe. I blinked, as if coming out of a fog. I must have cut myself walking over here barefoot. Gross. I’d have to wash my sheets too.
