Page 21 of Side Hustle
It took me longer, but I finally made it, lying down and soaking in the sun with my board dipping and bobbing with the roll of the placid ocean. I didn’t know how long we stayed that way, comfortable in our silence together. I wasn’t a silent kind of girl normally, always jumping from one thing to another, but maybe I’d been missing out on this Zen-like state. Maybe there was something to just sitting still and relaxing.
“Wanna talk about it?” Rip asked eventually.
I sighed. I did, but I also really liked lying there next to him and ignoring everything.
“She talked to Yedda and wants to reconnect with me. I don’t. That’s it.”
I could hear him shifting to look over at me, his foot now on my board to keep us from drifting too far apart. How could he lie on his side like that with his head in his hand and not tumble into the water? I played it safe and just strained my eyes looking to the side to see him.
“It’s not really that easy, though, is it? I mean, she left without a word, right? Don’t you have some questions for her?”
“Don’t you dare say closure! I hate that word.”
He flashed a smile before getting serious again. “I wouldn’t dare. Just wondering if she has an explanation for leaving all those years ago.”
“Honestly, it doesn’t matter why. She did. End of story. And I had to deal with it. I had to explain to everyone that I not only didn’t have a dad, but I no longer had a mom. Not easy in a small town where everyone knows everyone. Some people to this day call me ‘Hazel, the girl whose mom left her.’ Knowing why she left won’t change the outcome.”
I sat up, indignation and anger making me forget I was on a board in the middle of the ocean. It rocked, but I gripped the sides and held on until it steadied. Quite like my life, actually. Hang on and ride out the waves.
“Maybe she has some sort of life-ending illness and wants to make amends.”
My head whipped over to look at him, damn the balancing consequences. “Are you kidding me right now? You want me to not only be pissed off, but now feel guilty?”
He sat up too and I enjoyed the way his abs flexed and bunched. “No. Not at all. Just exploring all possibilities for why now. You know? Why would she wait until you’re almost thirty before coming back to talk? It’s weird.”
I nodded, anger tamping down as I realized he wasn’t passing judgement on my feelings about avoiding her, but rather just trying to solve the mystery of Kendra. Good luck getting inside her head. It was probably a very dark and twisted place.
“That’s what I told Granny. She’s probably here for something that will benefit her. Maybe she ran out of drug money. Or ran out of boyfriends to feed her lifestyle. She doesn’t do things for others. This is about her. Mark my words.”
I was already tired of talking about her, so I changed subjects. “What about you? Have you planned out what to do about your dad?”
Rip smiled, but it looked more like a grimace by an evil cartoon character.
“Don’t make that face.”
“What face?”
I pointed at him, my finger almost poking that tanned skin. “That one. The one that makes you look really mean.”
He grabbed my finger and pulled me so close the edges of our boards clanked together. My heart skipped a beat, probably from the fear of falling into the water, not because at this close of range I could sniff Rip again.
“It’s not nice to point your finger in someone’s face, Hazel.”
Rip’s growl flowed over me like hot lava, leaving me shivering and burning up at the same time. What the hell was that? How could a simple sentence sound like a dirty innuendo from the guy who never flirted? If I didn’t drown out here on the ocean, I might drown in those intense brown eyes.
I tugged my hand back, tucking it back under my thigh where it wasn’t in danger of reaching back out for him once the withdrawals set in. Rip sighed and looked away. My spine sagged once his gaze swung away, no longer under the laser beam of his intense scrutiny.
“I’m ready to take him down. He’s beat me down my entire life and it’s time for him to pay.” His gaze swung back to me and I wanted to cry at what I saw there. “I learned a long time ago to stay under the radar and slink away. It was my coping mechanism. When the yelling turned to hitting in high school, I got even quieter and just did what I was told.”
A tiny whimper escaped and my hand flew to my mouth. I’d known about the bruises, but Rip had never wanted to talk about it when we were younger. Like a naive idiot, I assumed it had been a one-time thing. His jaw clenched hard and his knuckles turned white as he clenched his fists.
“A life of hiding out isn’t going to work for me after all. I want more. Mom might never have the courage to do it, but I’m ready to stand up to him now.”
I didn’t think. I just went with the emotion welling up in my chest and clogging my throat. I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his warm neck. A second too late I remembered where we were. The force of my bear hug shot my board out from under me and the weight of me on the side of his board tipped us over. The water splashed over our heads in a polar bear plunge I hadn’t signed up for today.
Instinct had me holding my breath and squeezing my eyes shut. I felt Rip’s strong legs kick and suddenly our heads broke the surface. I gasped for air, my eyes wide with shock. Rip let out a yelp that mirrored the huge grin on his face. He started laughing, his arms around me, holding me above the surface while he shook with chuckles that soon turned contagious. I wasn’t sure if I was laughing or just shivering violently, but at least Rip’s warm body surrounded me.
Still kicking, his laughter settled as his gaze zeroed in on my face. He pushed the hair out of my face, one arm still banded tight around my waist. His muscled torso felt like heaven against me. Maybe it was the shock of falling in the water. Maybe it was the aftermath of sharing something intimate about our lives, but something changed between us in that moment. All the reasons we didn’t like each other seemed to have sunk to the bottom of the ocean below us, no longer tethering us down in hate and animosity.
