Page 41 of Lines We Cross
He cupped my face in that way he always did. “I love you, Skylar Rae, and I promise to show you how I feel until you believe me.”
I bit my lip, wanting to blurt out that I loved him back, but knowing it was too soon. I could only say it if I believed in him one hundred percent. Saying it now would be a lie. I’d never told any man I loved them. I nodded, hoping he understood that when I said it back it would mean forever.
He tugged my lip free from my teeth and kissed me softly, his lips coaxing me as much as the flowers and the hugs and the way he looked at me like no one else existed. He finally pulled back and looked at me with such tenderness I believed he really did love me.
“Want to say anything to Emerson?” he asked softly.
My throat closed and I had to take a deep breath to keep from feeling like I’d pass out. I nodded and turned toward the grave site. I desperately wanted to be brave. To be able to talk to my brother and reminisce about him without having to leave the room or break down in front of a client the second his name was uttered. My hands shook, so I knelt down and brushed some leaves off the stone to have something to do with them. I felt Max back up a step to give me some space. His calm presence kept me tethered to the here and now.
“Hi, E. It’s been a little while since we chatted. I’m sorry about that. Been a little busy trying to survive in a world without you in it.” My voice broke and I took a few seconds to swallow the lump in my throat. “Your knucklehead friends are back. All four of them. Nickel Bay is quaking in their boots.” Max chuckled behind me, and amazingly, I broke out into a smile.
“As Max already told you, he and I are dating now. Not quite sure how he conned me into that, but it’s going well so far. If he steps out of line, I promise to kick his butt just like you would.” I brushed my hand over the gravestone again, wishing it were my brother instead of cold hard stone. “I really like him, Em, so please be okay with it. And I know I’m just talking to a lump of grass and stone, but I want you to hear it anyway. I love you. Always will.”
There was nothing left to say that told more of my heart than those simple words. I went to stand up and Max was right there to help me. I used to pine for his attention when we were young. Now that I had it, I wasn’t sure what to do with the power of it. I had a feeling there was nothing to do but accept it and trust it. He wrapped his arm around me and we walked back to the truck. I let out a huge breath when we stepped back through the gate to the parking lot.
“Doing okay?” Max asked me.
I nodded, looking around and taking in the pretty pine trees that surrounded the cemetery, painting it in cozy shadows. Birds flitted from tree to tree like something monumental hadn’t just happened.
“Yeah, I really am. Thank you for bringing me here. It was hard, but I feel good after.”
Max smiled and leaned down to brush his lips across mine. “Let’s get some lunch, huh?”
We climbed in the truck and he just started the engine when his phone started chirping. He took a look at the screen and looked at me in apology. “I have to take this. You mind?”
“Go ahead.”
He answered, his voice clipped. There was a lot of head nodding before Max finally got a chance to talk.
“I’m actually glad you called. I’d like to officially retire at the end of the season. I’ll have my agent talk to the PR team and work out a way to announce it.”
I blinked, looking through the windshield, just able to make out the tree that stood watch over Emerson’s grave in the distance. Another layer of concern about Max and me lifted from my chest, leaving me feeling practically giddy. He was staying. Max loved me and he was staying in Nickel Bay.
“I don’t know what put that gorgeous smile on your face, but I like it.”
I startled, not realizing that Max had hung up the phone. He was staring intently at me, those eyes sparkling with love and mischief. Always mischief. Without a thought but the fact that I loved him back, I leapt across the console between us and kissed him.
The short hair on the back of his neck tickled my palm as I held him to me, my tongue darting out to taste him, needing to tell him with a kiss how much he meant to me like I needed oxygen. He eagerly participated, his hands unable to find a resting place. They traveled through my hair, over my back, down my arms, and back into my hair.
I finally pulled back and sat in the passenger seat, a finger to my swollen lips. Max was breathing hard and looking out the window.
“What was that for?” he asked gruffly.
A giggle escaped, so uncharacteristic for me, Max turned and stared. “I don’t really know. I think I just finally believed it when you told that guy you were officially retiring. I kept thinking you’d heal your knee and go back. That this”—I gestured between us—“was just temporary.”
“Temporary? I told you I love you.” Max’s jaw dropped.
I lifted a shoulder and let it drop. “Well, you’ve kissed me before and left, so…”
Max spun in his seat to face me, his big body contorted to accommodate for the steering wheel. “Hold up. You thought I’d leave again? This is about kissing you at graduation?”
My eyes widened. “Well, yeah. I had this huge crush on you and then you laid one on me at graduation. You had me seeing stars, Max. I don’t think my feet even touched the ground going home that night. And then you left. I went to your house the next day to talk to you and your mom said you’d already headed out of town to go to a training camp. And news flash: I didn’t see you again for twelve years. So what was I supposed to think?”
Max scrubbed a hand over his face. “Rae…I’m so sorry. I had a crush on you senior year, but I couldn’t act on it. It’s written in the best friends’ bro-code law book. You can’t go out with your best friend’s little sister. Kissing you at my graduation was a break in self-control. I guess I just couldn’t leave without kissing the one girl who’d gotten under my skin. But I also knew I couldn’t act on it any more than that. It had to be a stolen kiss and then I had to leave before I let us take it too far.”
Max grabbed my hands and held them in his. “I never meant to make you feel abandoned. I had no idea you had a crush on me. I figured you’d be mad that I kissed you and never want to see me anyway. I thought leaving town right after was doing you a favor. I’m so sorry. You have to believe me.”
I nodded, remembering how protective Emerson was of me. Max was right. There was no way he could have acted on his crush without destroying his friendship with Emerson. I’d just turned sixteen at the time while Max had been eighteen. Emerson would have freaked out and so would my parents.
