Page 30 of Lines We Cross
His thighs brushed mine as he shifted slowly to the beat of the music. I couldn’t have told you what was playing. Everything around me faded into the background and there was just Max and me, staring into each other’s eyes.
“What point?” My voice barely carried, but being so close, he heard me.
He leaned in and brushed his nose against my cheek, sending shivers cascading down my back. “That guy’s not worthy of you, Rae. You deserve so much better than that.”
My eyes drifted shut at his words. They held such comfort, such caring. After Emerson got sick and couldn’t be the big brother to me he’d always been growing up, I hadn’t allowed myself to accept much comfort, not even from my parents. I’d simply soldiered on, taking care of Emerson, opening my clinic, and carrying on even though my heart was torn to shreds after he died. Max, holding me so softly, whispering such sweet words to me, made me feel taken care of in a way I hadn’t felt in maybe forever.
“Promise me you’ll hold out for someone who’ll cherish you,” he urged, his hold on my waist tightening to emphasize his plea.
I nodded, not daring to open my eyes. One look at his face and I knew I’d make promises with my heart that I shouldn’t. I’d fall under his spell again with just a simple look and I’d promise to hold out for only him.
His thumb swiped across my back, sliding under the hem of my shirt and lighting my skin on fire. The song changed, but the beat stayed slow and sultry. The silence was comfortable though the air between us was charged. I could have been imagining it, but it sure felt like there was something there. Something more than friendship.
“I want to kiss you, Rae…” he whispered above my head.
I nearly stumbled. Had I heard him right?
The song ended on a long strum of Lacey’s guitar. Max shifted and the room came back to me a little at a time. The floor covered in peanut shells ground under everyone’s shoes. The cramped dance floor full of my friends and neighbors. The cheering from the crowd as they expressed their appreciation for Lacey’s song.
Max leaned down and kissed the top of my head, then spun and tugged me back to the table where our friends remained. My ears were on fire. He kissed my head. Is that what he meant when he said he wanted to kiss me? I was pretty sure head kisses were something between friends, not lovers. At the round table, he let go of my hand and grabbed his beer where he’d left it on the table. I guessed our dance was over.
Once again, Max had tugged on my heart and then left me confused and adrift.
* * *
“So… What’s up with that dance?” Kadee asked in a singsong voice in the car on the way back to my place. Ava let out an ear-piercing wolf whistle. I gripped the steering wheel harder and prayed for patience.
We stayed for Lacey’s whole show, all the while I studiously ignored Max. I gave myself a strong lecture in my head as I swayed to the music, beating myself up for trusting him again. I was smarter than that, stronger than that. A few whispered words meant to seduce should not reduce me to a bumbling female willing to hand over her whole heart to a man who didn’t deserve it. Max was right about one thing: I should only trust my heart to someone who would cherish it. And Max certainly didn’t fall into that camp.
I blew out a long breath. “Listen, there’s some flirting there, but let me tell you, he doesn’t mean it. That’s just Max. He flirts with every woman he sees. Doesn’t mean anything.”
“I don’t know, Sky. He doesn’t flirt with me or Ava.” Kadee twisted her long hair and somehow got it to stay in a bun at the top of her head without a hair tie to hold it in place.
I hated the way my heart leapt at the sliver of a chance that I might mean something special to Max.
“Guys, seriously. Let it drop,” I snapped.
“Whoa, my friend. We’re not trying to hurt you, we just see how your face lights up when Max is around. It’s like the air particles all freak out with electricity when you two are in the same room.”
“Yeah,” Ava added. “Remember we love you. We’re just wondering why you’re so opposed to something happening with you and Max. You have a history, you’re friends, and he’s moving here for good. Seems to us like that could work out.”
I sighed, letting my head drop back against the headrest while I stopped at the red light where I made my left turn to the neighborhood where we all lived. The houses were smaller out here. Basically starter homes for young families. It was all I could afford, but I actually loved my house. It was mine, bought and paid for monthly with the money I made with the clinic. Emerson would be proud of me.
“Sorry. I just—well.” I hadn’t ever told them what happened on graduation day. I’d been able to keep the kiss a secret all these years. Mainly because I hadn’t seen Max again for twelve years.
I pulled onto my street and made the decision to finally tell them everything. They needed to understand how I felt about Max now that he’d moved back to town. I put the car in park once I pulled in my driveway and swiveled to face the girls.
“Remember the day Emerson graduated high school?”
Their confused faces nodded.
“Well, I went down onto the field to congratulate Emerson and get a picture with him when the ceremony ended. But I ran into Max first. There were people everywhere and it was chaos. He took one look at me with a big grin on his face and swept me into a hug. And then, well, he sort of cupped my face and kissed me.”
“What?” Kadee shouted in the quiet confines of the car.
“Shh… Jeez, you don’t need to wake the whole neighborhood,” I muttered.
Ava slapped my arm playfully. “Why didn’t you tell us? You had a huge crush on him that whole year.”
