Page 9 of Christmas Eve Do-Over
5
Shasta
It took a few days to shake off the melancholy that clung to me like bad body odor since my dinner with Duke. It had been both wonderful and tortuous to spend time with him. We had great conversation; we got along well. We always had, and that hadn't changed. But every time I looked at him I remembered what I gave up and what happened after. I remembered the beatings I took, the broken bones, the split lips. The shattered self-esteem.
And then he was so damn sweet. Like my favorite sweatshirt I put on when I wanted to curl up with something soft and dependable and warm. I snorted out loud to myself. I was comparing a hot man to an old sweatshirt. What was wrong with me!
I was spun out after seeing him, that was the only explanation. He wanted to date me, which was all kinds of tempting, which was also crazy because I'd been perfectly happy on my own for over a decade. And then I’d told him about Jason. The only people who knew the full story were my Beach Squad girls and my therapist. And there I was, telling him everything after a mere hour together. I had to reinforce my boundaries or this man would topple every wall I'd built to protect myself. Every wall necessary for survival.
"Shasta, you almost done in there? We've got that group coming in any minute." Brinley stuck her head in the doorway of my office at the back of the studio. I should have been updating our books with last months' memberships and all I had to show for it was a head full of conflicting thoughts.
I glanced down at the calendar on my desk. "What group?"
"The one I told you about last month, remember? The Jr. Guards?" Brinley's forehead wrinkled, probably wondering if I'd lost my marbles. Maybe I had, maybe I had...
"I'm sorry, I don't remember. I thought Jr. Guards was a summer thing."
"Well, they are, but they're expanding their program and wanted to put together a new week-long camp over winter break where the kids could get additional training. And we're that camp."
"Oh, oh, that's right, I don't know how I forgot. You've been working on putting it together for the last month." I shut down my computer and took my reading glasses off. "I'll be out in just a second and you can put me to work."
Brinley fist-bumped me and walked out just as the bell on the front door rang.
"Duke! Nice to see you again." Brinley's voice carried all the way back into my office.
"Oh shit..." I mumbled, squeezing my eyes tight. If I didn't see him, maybe he wouldn't actually be there. How could I have forgotten? Duke said he moved here to head up the Jr. Lifeguards program.
I heard a loud group of kids enter the studio, their voices bouncing off the brick walls.
"Shasta?" Duke's kind voice came from right in front of me, a smile evident in his tone.
"Shush. I'm pretending you're not here."
"Wow. Good thing my ego's so big, it's not crushed right now."
I continued to squeeze my eyes shut. How I thought this plan might work, I'm not sure, but it was the only defense I had so I threw myself into it full force.
"Gonna be kind of hard to help teach the class with your eyes closed like that." I couldn't see him, but I could hear the laughter barely restrained.
"It's worth a shot. Might make things more interesting." My brain was scrambling for a plan of escape, coming up empty.
"As long as I don't have to close my eyes. I've been looking forward to watching you kick some ass."
That got my eyes opening wide, seeing him resting his shoulder against my doorframe, dressed in dark jeans and a long-sleeve, black henley, snug across muscles in all the right places. The facial hair had grown, no longer considered scruff, but an actual beard now. The complete package was a sight to see. My lungs constricted and there didn't seem to be enough oxygen in the air. It hit me like a lightning bolt: I'd missed him.
"You flirting with me, Mr. Reynolds?"
"According to your friend the other day, it's Mr. Fox." He smirked at me, causing that fluttering again. I was either crushing over my ex-boyfriend or I had an undiagnosed heart murmur.
"That would be Bailey, and I wouldn't put stock into anything that girl says. She's crazy. In the best way, mind you, but crazy nonetheless." I stood up and faced the inevitable. "Now if you don't mind, we have impressionable kids out there that need me."
"I know what that's like..." he grumbled under his breath.
I gave him the side eye, but he just grinned at me, letting me pass before following behind me. I felt his gaze on my body, nearly tripping me with the heat that licked its way across my back and into my gut.
Hot flashes. I was having a hot flash while my heart was skipping beats. Great. Middle age was kicking my ass already.
What the hell was wrong with me? I could normally flirt at the drop of a hat, but one minute with Mr. Silver Fox and I was acting like a forty-year-old virgin, all panic mode and red cheeks.
