Page 21 of Barefoot Chaos
Time to jump and see if we'd fly. "I-I brought something that's really personal to me. It's something I grew up doing and I wanted to share it with you. See if you'd join me."
"Okay..."
That was the longest, drawn out 'okay' I'd ever heard. If I wasn't so nervous myself, I would have laughed at her reluctance.
Time to go for broke. "Without further ado..." I popped open the latch and threw back the lid. "I give you...my ukulele!"
I picked it up and brought it to my lap, fingers instantly finding their place, strumming a few bars out of habit.
Hessa's eyes opened wide and her smile grew. "That's fabulous! Let me hear you play!"
"Well, here's the thing. I know quite a few Hawaiian songs and some covers you'd probably recognize. But what I really want to do tonight is sing with you." I paused to make sure she understood my meaning and how badly I wanted this. "I want you to sing, Hessa."
8
Hessa
Crud muffin! He wanted me to sing!
Damn him and his persuasive abilities. He warmed me up with funny stories, got me all relaxed with meditation in front of nature's greatest show at eventide, and now he dropped this bomb on me.
The thing is, I really wanted to do it. But I was scared spitless to do it. And I hated that he put me on the spot like this. How could I say yes and overcome my fear in front of the person I wanted to impress most? How could I say no and risk hurting his feelings and pushing him away? For heaven's sake, he said it was highly personal, a part of his childhood, and he wanted to share it with me. Turning him down would be equivalent to a slap in the face.
Before I could even formulate an answer, tears sprang to my eyes. I was between a rock and a hard place. Either way I'd hurt someone: me or him.
"Whoa, hold on there. You don't have to do it. I want you to, but I won't pressure you further. I promise. Please don't cry." Kai tossed the ukulele back in its case and leaned over me, pulling my hands into his. Which of course, just made the tears fall faster.
He responded the only way an intelligent man can by pulling me into a hug, his warm arms wrapping me up, shielding me from the ocean breeze. Words would come later, but for now, this contact was everything I needed.
Coconuts and man-sweat.
His heavenly scent surrounded me and distracted me from my tears. My body melted into his, enjoying the feel of his muscles bracketing my form. I'd never been a small girl, but in his embrace, I felt protected by a force stronger and braver than me.
All too soon, he pulled back. His hands cupped my face and his thumbs wiped the tears off my cheeks.
"I'm sorry, Ono," he whispered, just inches from my lips.
I gave him my truth. "I want to. I'm just scared." It was a scared confession I hated to put words to, which wasn't what he wanted, but it was something. Something honest at least.
His hands never left my face, thumbs and gaze caressing my skin. "I know you're scared. But I know you'd be incredible too. And I want to see you embrace your incredible."
I huffed out a quick guffaw. "I do too."
"Then trust me to help you. We'll start slow. Maybe hum some songs and see what comes of it. If you want to sing, great. If not, there's always tomorrow, yeah?"
At his encouragement, I nodded my agreement. His hands left my face to slide into my ponytail and down my back. My hair sprang loose as he pulled the tie down, spreading my hair and running his fingers through it.
"I've been wondering what you look like with your hair down. The ponytail is for your students. The way you look with your hair down, your eyes soft, skin flushed...that look is just for me and our music together."
My hippie lifeguard was a romantic.
If I wasn't already seated, I would have lost all control over my legs at that statement and that heated stare he was giving me. My cheeks burned hotter and I knew right then I'd made the right choice by being honest with him.
He sat back down and placed the ukulele on his lap again. "I know it seems cliché for me to play the ukulele, but it reminds me of home. We used to sit around the house, the backyard, the beach, around campfires. Really, anywhere people were gathered, someone would break out an ukulele and the singing would start. It didn't matter what your voice sounded like, or how well you played. It was about being together and sharing reminders of your ancestry, your culture."
I smiled, listening to him share something so personal. I could see now where he was coming from about keeping things casual. I was so worried about singing in front of people and he'd grown up with the opposite. Everyone sang and no one thought anything of it.
"Tell me how you grew up, Hessa." Kai strummed a few chords before easing into a melody I knew I'd heard before but couldn't place.
