Page 21 of Sweet Dreams
"What do you mean?" Baileyasked.
"Well, you saw his parents! They were dressed like they were going to a country club at 7a.m. Hell, they may have been! They obviously come from money which makes me a little uncomfortable. They wanted me to hire a private investigator! Like they didn't even think money might be an issue. And then Ivan wanted to swoop in and pay for it. It just doesn't sit well with me. I work hard for every dime I spend and I'm proud of what I've accomplished on my own," Iexplained.
Bailey reached over and grabbed my hands, stopping them from flying around as I spoke. "Esa, honey. Hold on a second. Remember, I'm on your side always, okay? But I think you may be overreacting to the parentsituation."
"Wha-" I immediatelyobjected.
"I know you've worked hard to do everything on your own, which is commendable. Truly. But just because someone has money, doesn't mean they can't understand your situation. You have a little bit of a chip on your shoulder about the money thing, Esa. I know why you do, I can see why you carry that chip, but let's not pretend it's not there," Bailey said. She was gripping my hands and speaking softly, delivering her blows withcare.
"You've never mentioned this before," Iargued.
"I know, honey, but I've seen it. What I won't do now is sit around and watch you carry that chip on your shoulder, using it as a weapon against Ivan, a man that seems really good for you. Could you at least see things from Ivan's parents' perspective? Here's their son, finally interested in a woman, after all the shit he's gone through. And this woman is in trouble. They have money, they can help her and therefore help their son be with the woman he's crazy about. Wouldn't you offer your money too? And as far as Ivan is concerned, the guy doesn't come across as rich and aloof. For the love of God, he drives a plain, four-year-old truck. He works out at a neighborhood gym, not a fancy, expensive boutique gym. He's not flashy or condescending atall."
I sat there with that, not speaking, just absorbing. I guess I did have a bit of an attitude when it came to wealthy parents wanting to throw money around. If I was being honest with myself, I was actually jealous. I didn't have parents to help me out anymore and that cut deep. I had to make things work financially as a very young adult, knowing I didn't have wealthy parents, or any type of parents, to bail me out if I messed things up. I was proud of what I'd accomplished but that didn't mean I should begrudge Ivan his parents’ wealth. He didn't ask for them to be wealthy, it was just the situation he'd grown up with. And she was right, Ivan wasn't flashy at all. He was really laid back and, hell, he probably worked harder than me, even though he didn't needto.
Ah crap, I was overreacting, and I hated admitting it. I lifted my gaze up to meet Bailey's. She looked worried. Probably wondering if she'd pushed it too far. So I smiled, squeezed her hands back and said, "I see what you're saying. And you're right. I was overreacting. I'll try to give his parents the benefit of the doubt from now on." I paused, then added, "Thank you for calling me on my shit, Bailey-girl. I think I was just picking a fight because this is all new territory forme."
That's when we hugged it out like besties do. And of course that led to Bailey asking if we'd slept together yet. I guess I did say I wanted girltalk.
"Well, not yet exactly," I replied with a secretive smile on myface.
"What the hell does that mean? Spill, woman!" Bailey demanded, leaning forward in her chair, ready for sexy storytime.
I laughed at her eagerness and dished the details, knowing she hadn't heard any good stories from me in years. "Let's see, I guess we've made it to third base, if I have my bases right. Lots of making out, he's had me naked twice, and he's gone down on me once. Which, by the way, was freaking spectacular. The boy knows exactly what he's doing, which worries me a bit, but at the time, I was too caught up in his tongue and fingers to think about it. When I got my brain back to functioning, he wouldn't even hear of me returning the favor. He said he wants to wait until I'm ready. Said my ex must have been quite the ass to make me take a five-year break, so he wants to make sure I'm sure. And that's so crazy sweet, I can't help but trust him more, you know?" I rambled on as Bailey nodded her head. "Do you think I should be worried about my lack of experience compared to his? Don't you have to be, like, man-slut level to have that kind of tonguetechnique?"
Bailey burst out laughing. "I don't think you should worry about anything. Just be grateful he knows what he's doing, and he's doing it onyou."
"Yeah, I suppose you're right. I know it's only been a few days, but you think it's okay to jump in bed with him?" I asked. I didn't understand the dating game, so I was super hopeful her answer was a definite 'yes'.
"Only you can answer that, Esa. If it feels right to you, then I say, go for it," shereplied.
"I trust him. And I want to see if we can make this work. And I really want to see if other parts of him are as talented as his tongue," I said, then giggled like a love-struck teenager. I couldn't help it. I was happy, I was having fun, and it felt fantastic to be light hearted. I couldn't recall the last time I felt thisplayful.
Bailey stood up, hugged me again, and said, "It's good to see you happy, honey. You totally deserve it. Now come on, we both gotta get ready forwork."
Later that day at Chocolate Dreams, I got a call from Detective Ramirez saying he was emailing me a digitally improved picture of the man they got on the cameras at Pacific City the night my shop was vandalized. Unfortunately, the cameras from the underground parking lot surrounding my car were too blurry to produce any kind of image that would help identify the guy. He asked me to print the picture, study it, and see if any of his features looked familiar. I assured him I would. He also told me one other thing that sent my headspinning.
"Esa, I hate to say this, but it's my job to look at all angles. Have you considered that it might be Ivan that's been doing these things?" Jack askedquietly.
My jaw dropped and my heart sank. Could it be Ivan? Could I be making yet another bad choice with men? I replayed all our conversations and interactions in my head, but it was too much to take in all at once. Jack must have figured my silence meant I was overwhelmed because he was quick tocontinue.
"Listen, I have absolutely no evidence it's Ivan, and I've heard only great things about him. But. All this stalker stuff started happening when you and Ivan started dating, right? If it's even remotely possible it's him, I want you with your eyes wide open, okay? Can you just keep an open mind and look for anything that seems odd?" Jack askedme.
"Well sure, but Jack, I honestly just don't see this being Ivan. I'll think about it and let you know if anything seems weird, but I really think you're off base here," Iexplained.
"I hear you. Just think about it. In the meantime, I'll be busy over here seeing if we have evidence that leads to anyone else, okay?" Jackfinished.
"Okay, that sounds good. Thank you," I responded. My mind was whirling, too stunned to focus on theconversation.
"Esa, I don't want to freak you out, but I want you to be aware. Are you sure you're alright? I can come to the shop and talk it through with you..." he offered. I wasn't sure if the offer was in the normal scope of police work or not, but it wassweet.
"No, I'm totally fine, Jack. It just caught me by surprise." It was just something else to worry about now. Could I have made another colossal mistake with Ivan? At the rate I was going, I'd be needing Botox at the ripe old age of twenty-six for this huge frown line that kept showing up on myface.
I hung up with Jack and placed a call to Strike Ready, the self-defense school downtown. I decided to just keep busy until I had some alone time at home to sort through everything Jack had stirred up. I spoke to a very nice lady who owned the school, and she explained how the classes run. She said Bailey and I could come in for a private lesson later this afternoon with one of her instructors. One-on-one time was helpful in the beginning, and especially given my stalker situation, she wanted to get a jump on my training. Bailey said she was available for the lesson at 5p.m. so I booked it and checked that off my list of things todo.
Lastly, I got a call from my car insurance company saying they received the report from the police, along with pictures from the repair shop. They assured me that everything was covered, I would just need to pay the $250 deductible. That was good news, considering the repair work was well over $2,000. The repair shop assured them that my car would be back in my possession in just a few moredays.
And then I attacked my shop with a bucket and a bottle of Windex. I gave it a cleaning it hadn't had since we opened. Some women eat when stressed. Iclean.
