Page 3 of Chieftain
"Not quite," Pearl snorted. "Jamie and Claire would be having sex."
"Pearl!" Daisy was the only one who didn't outright laugh, but I heard her soft giggle despite the pantomime of outrage.
"Oh please," Pearl snorted. "I've seen your copy of Voyager. Chapter fifty-six is so dog-eared that it looks like the centerfold pages of a teenager's copy of Playboy."
Beside me, Willa's snorted laughter sounded like a pig rooting for truffles.
"Leave Daisy alone," Agnes started what sounded like a defense of our friend before segwaying. "She's only ever been with one man. She's practically a virgin."
"You take that back!" Daisy squeaked.
"I've got a more important question," Pearl said drolly.
"What?" Clara asked.
Pearl shifted, giving a painful grunt. "Who the hell is going to pull all our old asses up off this ground." She shifted again. "Seriously. I don't think I can get up."
At that point, we all sounded like pigs rooting for truffles.
"I'll help you get up, Grandma," I teased. Opting to lay flat on my back with my knees bent seemed like a good idea at the time, but now I wasn't so sure. I'd get to my feet smoothly if it killed me. I damn sure wasn't giving Pearl the satisfaction of seeing anything different.
"Oh, fuck you," Pearl grumbled, her movements reminiscent of a turtle flipped on its back.
I'd opened my mouth to give a retort when Willa jerked upright, her eyes trained heavenward. "What the hell is that?
I followed her line of sight to the globe of bright white light coming toward us.
"It's not a shooting star that would be traveling horizontally across the sky," Clara said. She should know afterspending her career as a high school science teacher. "That thing is coming right for us."
"A meteor, maybe?" Agnes rose to her knees, worry plain in her movement.
"A meteor would catch fire coming through the atmosphere. We'd be able to see an orange glow." Clara stood, hands on her hips, eyes never leaving the sky.
"Listen," Pearl said, laying her fingers across her lips and giving aShhh.
I clamored to my feet, suddenly uncaring of my lack of grace. The sound was faint, but it was the definite whirr of a motor. "A helicopter, maybe?"
"What would a helicopter be doing up here." Willa propped her hands on her hips, a scowl flickering across her features. "I happen to know none of the military runs any operation over this part of the trail."
"It's not unheard of for convicts to hide out on the trail." In my long career with the Clarke County DA's office, I'd prosecuted several felons found hiding in the mountainous terrain.
"Oh joy," Pearl huffed, rolling onto all fours in a maneuver to rise. "Now I have to worry about bearsandmurderers."
The light came closer, its brightness blinding.
"Can't they see we're just a bunch of old broads camping," Clara grunted, holding up her hand to shield her eyes.
"Maybe they're looking for us?" I suggested when the light stopped and hovered almost directly overhead. A shimmy of fear skittered down my spine. The engine noise was a softpurr, not what one would expect from a helicopter--at least not at the county sheriff level. If this was law enforcement, it was the FBI... or higher.
"Oh great," Pearl grumbled. "Which one of ya'll robbed the liquor store?"
"I don't drink," Daisy murmured, stepping closer to my side.
"I've still got my DA's badge," I told them, hoping it would ease the tremble of fear I felt among the group. "That way, if it is some kind of mistaken identity, we won't have to spend the night in jail."
"I think I'd take jail over the ground," Pearl finally reached her feet.
"I think…" I didn't finish my sentence. The light throbbed, flashing so brightly it felt like blades stabbing into my eyeballs.
