Page 22 of Bart (Hades Rejects MC)
“Don’t look at my shit like that Mr. Nobody, I find that not having someone greeting my patients makes them talk to one another, the bean bags bring them back to when they were younger and trust was easier. See there’s a method to my madness. Now come on, she’s waiting in my session room.” Alright so that kind of made sense, I had to admit that, and I was tempted to sit down in the huge bean bag in the middle. It looked comfortable; don’t judge me.
Walking into the session room, I’m again thrown for a loop, instead of your typical monochromatic colors, it’s like a Skittles bag blew up. Bright pinks, purples, greens, yellows, and blues everywhere, I have to admit it took me a minute for my brain to catch up.
“What the hell is he doing in here Dr. Diaz? You can wait with the bean bags, if you don’t want to wait in the truck.” Dr. Diaz came in right behind me tsking at Bliss.
“Now Bliss, that’s no way to treat our guest, I’ve asked Mr. Nobody to join us. I think you need to let him see what I see, a girl ready to move on with her life.” Bliss crosses her arms and pouts, it’s so adorable I can’t help but smile.
“Why are you fucking smiling at me? Go back to your sweet butt and leave me to have my appointment.” She clamped her hand over her mouth as soon as the words left it. How the hell could she even think I was with someone else? I lived, breathed, and shit her; she was all I ever wanted, all I ever dreamed about.
“I’m smiling because you look adorable pouting, and who said I was with some sweet butt? You know...you know...hell you know I love you, I’ve told you that a thousand times. Why on earth would you ever think I’d be with someone else?” I’m not prepared for her tears when they come, followed by her hitting me while yelling.
“You know damn well; your sorry ass was fucking some whore when I called. Don’t act like you weren’t, I heard her voice in the background. Yeah, you love me right; your dick just needed some relief, that it huh?” She stops hitting me as I reach my arms around her and hold her, and she doesn’t fight me; it’s the first time she’s let me this close to her. Even though I have no idea what she’s talking about, if it means this is the end result I’ll take the punishment. Once she’s calmed down she pulls away, my arms have never felt so empty.
“Well now, I’d say that was a breakthrough Bliss, you let someone other than Holland hold you, and you didn’t scream. Good job Bart, now can we sit down and muddle through this bullshit that’s in her head.” I was beginning to think this doctor was crazy. Sitting down together on the pink sofa, I was hoping for some more holding action if I stayed. I know, sad right? Getting excited about being able to hold her, but after the last six months of only being able to sit next to her and watch movies, play games, having dinner with Pops, or going to the bar for a few rounds, holding her for those five minutes was worth some uncomfortable talking.
“Bliss, darlin’ I’m not sure what you thought you heard, but I wasn’t with any woman today Hell, I haven’t been with any woman other than you for the last six months. I was watching TV with Pops, you probably heard the chick on there, we were watching...shit do you really want to know what we were watching?”
“Unless it was porn, spill.” She’s staring at me expectantly, and I’m so not looking forward to her reaction when I tell her.
“Look before I tell you, just so we are clear, I blame you for getting us hooked on the damn show to begin with, it was Grey’s Anatomy, alright.” And bring on the laughs, yep she’s doubled over laughing her ass off at me, at least she’s laughing. I can’t help myself and start to laugh along with her. “Now am I forgiven, or you want to call Pops and verify, because I’m pretty sure he’ll skin me alive for telling you that shit.”
“Yeah, you’re forgiven, I promise not to tell Pops you spilled the beans, and Dr. Diaz has that whole doctor/patient confidentiality thing going, your secret is safe.”
“Yep, your secret is safe with me. Now shall we start our session Bliss. How about you tell handsome here why you were so upset that he might have been with another woman?” Oh I knew I liked this doctor, where I couldn’t get her to admit she still wanted more from us, this doctor was about to break down that wall. Come on baby, tell me you want me. She’s fidgeting with her hands, don’t back down now baby girl, just say it.
“Do I have to? I mean he has to know already, that’s why that smirk hasn’t left his face. If I say it, it’s only going to boost his ego, and look at him, does he really need a boost.” Of course I was smiling, my girl was jealous; I was fucking over the moon.
“Bliss, what have we said about holding things in? We give them power over us, do you want this to have power over you?” I could kiss this doctor right now, if it wouldn’t probably piss Bliss off I’d probably do it. Come on baby, say the words, that’s all I need to hear.
“Fine, if I have to say it, it’s because I still have feelings for him. There, happy!” She looks like a petulant child, her lip stuck out, arms crossed over her body, and it only makes me want to see how flexible she is in that bean bag out front.
“Very good Bliss, now Bart, it’s your turn.” What, what was she talking about?
“Um...she already knows how I feel about her.”
“Oh no, it’s your turn to open up to her, she gets one question. She can ask anything about you, anything. You want to build her trust in you, you’ll do this.” Shit, what had I gotten myself into? Nobody, said nothing about me talking, this doctor tricked me, but if it means building Bliss’s trust in me, I’d cut off my right arm if I had to.
“Alright, take it easy on me sweetness.” I’m cringing on the inside, but on the outside I’m giving her nothing but my smile. She’s rubbing her hands together now, like she’s warming up to give me a smack down. Lord, help me.
BLISS
I get to ask him anything, holy shit, this was my chance to delve into the mind of Bart. Now to figure out what to ask him, I have to make it worth my while. Looking over at him smiling away at me, he almost has me fooled, but I can see his eyes say he’s scared shitless.
“That’s not how this works mister, I get to ask anything remember. Why don’t you talk about your mom and sister?” I instantly regret my question as soon as I see the sadness enter his eyes, fuck. He takes a deep breath, while running his fingers through his hair, for a minute I think he’s going to bolt and not talk.
“Only for you sweetness, this is only for you baby. God, where to start? I guess the best way to start is when my sister got sick. Shit, this is hard. Isabel was around twelve, she’d been sick for a few weeks, coughing, fever, the works. Mom had taken her into the ER when her breathing started sounding funny. I remember Pops telling her that she’d probably gotten the flu, and she was overreacting. He stayed home with me, I still remember when she called, my father's face was white. I’d never seen him move so fast to get us to the hospital. When they’d x-rayed her chest, they’d found it; her lymph nodes were swollen. They followed that up with blood work; it was Leukemia, and it was spreading fast.” His head his bowed, I can see this is taking everything out of him, and for a moment, I want to ask him to stop. I reach over to grab his hand, and when he looks up at me I can see the vulnerability oozing out of him. Seeing him like this, strong enough to talk about it, yet broken inside, makes me love him that much more. He’s doing this for me, and I couldn’t ask for more. I squeeze his hand, letting my strength flow through me to him.
“You have to understand, Isabel was the light of our lives, not just my parents but mine. When she was born, she had this aura around her that just made everyone love her. My dad told me when they brought her home that she was my responsibility; I was her big brother and it was my job to keep her safe. Her heart was so big, even when she was tiny, if someone or something was hurt, she’d try to help them. So when she got sick and I couldn’t save her, I couldn’t protect her, it killed me. She fought so hard for over a year, we practically lived at the hospital, but in the end no one could make her better. The day she...when she joined the angels, it tore us apart, emotionally and physically.” His eyes are moist, I can see he’s close to tears, I scoot closer to him and wrap my arms around his body, something I haven’t been able to do except with Holland. He wraps himself around me, letting loose everything he’s been holding in all these years.
“She never even made it to her daughter’s funeral, how could she not at least say goodbye to her. Isabel deserved better than that. She told Pops that she would meet us at the funeral that morning, but she never showed. We got home to find all of her things gone, she’d packed up and left us. No note, no goodbye, she just left.” He’s letting it all out now, all the pain he’s kept hidden from everyone, holding onto me like I’m his only lifeline.
“It’s not your fault Bart, you know that now don’t you? Your sister had cancer, nothing you could have done back then would have saved her, you have to know that.” He’s shaking his head against my shoulder to Dr. Diaz’s question. How could he possible still think his sister's death was his fault?
“You don’t understand, don’t you see; she had leukemia and needed a bone marrow transplant and I wasn’t able to do that for her. They tested me to see if I could be her bone marrow donor, and I wasn’t a match. The doctors kept doing test after test, but when they came out to talk to Pops, they told him that the cancer was too aggressive and they could only make her comfortable, not even chemo and radiotherapy would have helped her. The treatments would have made her feel worse, so they recommended not administering them to her. Pops feels so guilty because he thought she had the flu, and by the time they took her to the hospital the doctors had run out of options to help my little sister. I should have been able to save her; it was my job, just like it was my job to keep you safe and I failed at that too. I’m so sorry Bliss, I failed you both.” Was this man crazy, did he not understand that what happened to me and his sister wasn’t his responsibility?
“Oh honey, you have nothing to apologize for, and I think if you really thought about it, you’d already know that. The things that happened to Bliss and your sister weren’t within your domain to fix or stop, I think that answered Bliss’s question, now it’s your turn to ask her one.” Oh shit, he’d just completely opened up to me, and now it was my turn, whatever he asked I knew was going to be painful to answer. Pulling him to me, I rub his back while he gets his thoughts together, and his emotions under control. His scent hits me, and my mind goes back to my hotel room after graduation, stop it mind, I can’t have that ever again.
BART
