Page 47 of Cottage in the Mist
His world wasn’t safe for her. Not with the threat from the Comyns. And worse from his own clan. Until he’d proven his innocence and avenged his father, there was no place in his life for her. He couldn’t be sure he’d be able to keep her safe. And that suddenly was more important even than having her with him.
Still his heart twisted, his stomach clenching. Their coming together had been a gift. And now he was risking losing it forever.
He secured his plaid, and still watching her sleep, reached for his father’s brooch, the mountain cat’s eyes glittering up at him. Closing his hand around it, he bent to retrieve Lily’s gown from the floor and then carefully pinned the brooch to the bodice. If he could not stay, then at least he’d leave her a part of him.
Clenching a fist, he laid the gown across the end of the bed, then secured his claymore and strode for the door, turning for one last look, praying that fate would be kind. That once the fighting was over, they would find each other again. But evenmore so, he prayed that if his boon were to be granted and they were indeed reunited, that Lily would find it in her heart to forgive him.
“The bloody bastard left me. He told me I belonged to him and then he walked away without looking back.” Lily paced in front of the stone fireplace in the great hall at Duncreag, her voice echoing across the room.
Mrs. Abernathy, Elaine and Jeff all watched her with trepidation. She knew she was losing it, and had it been any other situation, she’d have laughed at her own dramatics. But in truth, there was nothing to laugh at. Bram Macgillivray had left her. Just like everyone else in her life. She’d believed in him, let herself hope again. And now… now he’d left her and shattered her heart all over again.
“I’m such a stupid fool. How could I have believed him? I thought he cared about me. I thought he… he…” She trailed off, unable to say the words.
“Ach, now you don’t know what he was thinking,” Mrs. Abernathy soothed. “Maybe he didn’t mean to leave you. That’s what happened before, right? Neither of you could control it.”
She shook her head, clenching her fists. “Yes, but this time we knew better. We knew that we couldn’t be parted. I even told him I’d go with him. That I’d fight the damn Comyns if that’s what it took. Be a part of his stupid battle. But it didn’t matter. He left me anyway. For Iain and Ranald and honor. Believe me, he knew what would happen if he left. But that didn’t stop him, did it?”
“Maybe he had good reason,” Jeff offered.
“Like what?” She eyed him with suspicion. One man was very much like another after all. And, at the moment, she wasn’t inclined to trust any of them.
“Well, you mentioned a battle. I assume it has something to do with Bram’s father’s death?”
“Yes.” She nodded, anger still propelling her to pace. “He blames a man called Alec Comyn. Bram’s and Alec’s fathers were enemies, I think.”
“Would make sense.” Mrs. Abernathy nodded, her lips pursed as she considered the notion. “There’s never been any love lost between the Comyns and the Macgillivrays.”
“Yes and to make it worse, apparently Bram’s family—some of them anyway—believe that he is the one who killed his family. So they gave what’s left of Dunbrae to his uncle.”
“That can’t have gone over well,” Jeff said with a frown. “But why would they think it was him?”
“Apparently, in order for Alec Comyn’s men to have taken Dunbrae they would have had to have inside help. And someone is putting it about that Bram was the traitor.”
“Which makes his loss that much greater,” Mrs. Abernathy mused. “Poor lad.”
“I’ll grant you that,” Lily said, her heart squeezing as she thought of the pain in Bram’s voice. “But that doesn’t mean I forgive him for what he’s done.”
“Did Bram believe the Comyns were behind the attack at Duncreag as well?” Jeff asked, still clearly focused on Bram’s situation.
“Yes,” she admitted on a sigh. “He says they wore the right colors. Although everyone was killed, so they couldn’t confirm it. But a man from Dunbrae—“ She stopped before the fire, trying to remember. “—Frazier. Seamus’s captain, I believe. He confirmed it.”
“He’s there?” Jeff questioned. “At Duncreag?”
“Well, if Bram is to be believed, they’re all gone now,” she grimaced, starting to pace again. “They were due to ride out this morning. But yes, he arrived after they fought the Comyns.” All of which happened over five hundred years ago, she reminded herself. The impossibility of the entire thing made her want to scream.
“And he was sure it was the Comyns?” Jeff pressed.
“Yes.” She stopped again, frowning at him. “Frazier recognized them at Dunbrae. So there’s no question. But that isn’t reason enough to abandon me. If Bram truly cared, he’d have taken me with him.”
“Maybe Jeff’s right. Maybe his not taking you is the important bit.” Elaine reached out to touch her hand, and Lily stilled, her emotions rioting.
“That doesn’t make any sense.”
“Of course it does,” Mrs. Abernathy soothed. “If the man loves you, he’s not going to risk putting you in harm’s way.”
“It might seem a bit harsh by today’s standards, but we’re talking about a different time,” Jeff said. “Violence and vengeance ruled the clans in those days. It wasn’t safe for women.”
“But you let your sister go there.” She knew she was foundering. That her logic wasn’t making sense. But he’d left her, damn it. And no matter his reasons, she was the one left to pick up the pieces.
