Page 46 of Property of Mercy
“Why didn’t you just let him kill me?You all want me dead, but you saved me.”Her words hurt worse than any blade Blender could throw at me.
How do I explain it to this woman?I continue my slow stroking of the outside of her leg as I think over how in the hell to tell her what is going on in my fucked-up head.
“Ainsley, to be honest, when I stormed out of this clubhouse earlier, all I wanted was for you to hurt the way I was hurting.To finally have someone feel even half of what Jenny felt before she died.When you showed up here, I was determined for that to be you.”Taking a deep breath, I turn her so we’re chest-to-chest and her legs are spread out over mine.
“I can understand that.I wish every day that I would have gone with her that night.”She drops her forehead on my shoulder.“That it would’ve been me they took.That I died instead of her.”
Hearing her say that is like a flash grenade going off in my head.Without a thought, I spin us so that she is pinned under me with her favorite accessory firmly in place.I don’t apply pressure, it’s more to make sure that I have her full attention.I reach over with my free hand and turn on the lamp beside us.The light casts a subtle glow over the room.
Ainsley eyes are wide, with a touch of fear and a touch of arousal, then turn bright with only trust.That look gives me pause because there has only been one person who has ever looked at me like that.The look that tells you they know you have them.That no matter what comes their way in the world, you’re going to be the one to take out any threat to them.
“Do not ever say something like that.Do I wish that someone else could take Jenny’s place in death?Yes.One thing that I will never recover from is if you were to be that one.”Taking a deep shuttering breath trying to erase that from my mind, I continue.“I am not like everyone else.I do not know what it is to be loved or to love someone.What I can give you is that with my every breath, I will protect you.Nothing and no one will ever cause you harm and go unpunished for it.If you are close to me, I will always watch to be sure that you are happy, healthy, and safe.I plan to teach and show you what your body can do when it’s wonderfully disrespected.Love is not an emotion I know, but if all those things equal that in your eyes, then okay.”
As I speak, Ainsley's eyes get wider and wider, but her body relaxes under my hold.As I get done talking, she reaches up, cupping my face with her small hand and a soft smile on her lips.My fingers flex around her throat, yet I still don’t apply any actual pressure.I know she’s going to be hurting from the choke hold Relic had on her.
“Mercy, I want that with my entire being.But I can’t do that to you.”Her words are so broken that the monster pushes forward.
My eyebrows draw down in confusion.“I don’t understand.I’m the fucking psychopath that kills people for nothing more than looking at me some days.The man that the club calls when they need someone morally black.”
“Which is another reason I can't.You have people who depend on you, and I could never take that away from them.Shit, who knows what would happen to Blender if you weren’t here.”Her voice has grown in strength the longer she speaks.
“Ainsley, you’re not making any sense,” I tell her, shaking my head.
Ainsley huffs in exasperation.“Mercy, everyone I love or care for ends up fucking dead.As much as I would truly love to see where this could go, I can’t take the risk of that happening to you.”
I try.I truly do, but I can’t stop the laughter that bubbles out of me.I roll off Ainsley, lying beside her, laughing for the first time since I was probably a child.She rolls up onto her elbow, smacking me on the chest, and glares at me.
“Why the fuck are you laughing at me?”
“Because Little Lamb.Many have tried to end me and I’m still breathing.”I cup her chin, pulling her to me so our lips are close together.“Do you want to know how many are still breathing?”
“That better not ever fucking change,” she whispers before crashing her mouth down on mine.
I run my hand up the side of her face, cupping the back of her head.She opens her mouth for me to explore her.She places her small hand on my chest, pushing me so I’m lying flat on my back, and she crawls over to straddle my waist.My free hand comes down, grabbing her hip to steady her.Ainsley grinds down on my hard cock.
26
AINSLEY
Ipull away from Mercy’s mouth long enough to pull my shirt over my head.I shiver as his eyes rake over my body.Suddenly, he is sitting straight up, staring down at the top of my left breast as if he wants to tear it off.I look down to see what has flipped the switch in him like this.What I find causes revulsion to course through me, quickly followed by embarrassment.I move my arms to cover myself but with a gentleness I didn’t know he had, Mercy stops my hand.
His eyes snap up to mine, and he cups my cheek.“He will die tonight.There is nothing he could tell me that will stop it from happening.”
For a half a heartbeat, fear flares to life, but in the next—calmness flows.Mercy meant what he said.My safety and well-being, both emotional and physical, are his main concerns.Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pull his mouth to mine.
“I want to forget him.I want it to be just me and you—right here, right now.”I don’t let him answer.I place my lips on his.
“Tell me what you need, Little Lamb,” he whispers as he wraps his fingers around the column of my throat, leaning me back slightly.
Swallowing away the embarrassment, I embrace my need and ask him, “I need you to fuck me, Mercy.I want to ride your cock.”
“Oh, you want to ride my cock, do you?Have you been a good girl who deserves to ride my cock?”he whispers between kisses.
Leaning my head back to give him all the space he wants.I get too lost in his mouth on my skin, so when he nips my nipple with a growl, I shriek in surprise.
“You must not have been too good, considering you didn’t answer my question.”He smirks at me when he pulls back.
“It’s really difficult to come up with a clear thought when you have your mouth on my body,” I say, smiling sweetly.
