Page 61 of The Viscount in her Bedroom
“Perhaps. But when my circumstances were reduced, part of me thought that maybe I’d equated money with happiness, too. I loved those parties and balls and dinners. I was at ease in that world, confident of who I was. But when I no longer had that life, I eventually realized that I needed to find another, better way to be happy.”
“And you thought you could achieve that by being in someone’s employ?” he asked doubtfully.
“No, as I told you from the beginning—by helping someone. Specifically young girls like your sister. I thought that when I left here—”
He felt a strange pain in his stomach at the thought.
“—I might be able to hire myself out to the families who are newly rich, whose daughters have no idea how to behave in Society. I don’t mean amongst theton, of course, but amongst my Society.”
“You say that as if it’s a class below.”
“You know it is, even though you have always moved freely between the two. So what do you think about my plan?” she asked brightly.
He didn’t like the thought of her hiring herself out to families who might not appreciate her. But she didn’t want to hear that. “You’d be excellent at whatever you did.”
“Now you’re being patronizing,” she said with a huff.
“I am not. But you told me how you were treated at your last position. I just worry that you might run into the same situation—someone who would force you into something that you didn’t want.”
When she didn’t say anything, he felt tension grip his stomach. She hadn’t felt…forced by him, had she?
“Well, you needn’t worry,” she said primly. “I plan to do some of my own interviewing before I accept any position.”
“So the employers have to giveyoutheir references,” he said with amusement.
“Correct.”
They sat quietly for several minutes, and he realized how peaceful he found her company. He was still driven crazy with lust at just the smell of her, of course, but when he could subdue that, he simply…enjoyed her for the person she was.
“I should leave,” he finally said. “You must be tired.”
“I haven’t been riding in a long time, and muscles I had forgotten I had are sore.” She hesitated. “Georgie felt quite guilty riding.”
“And I told her not to. She actually asked my permission. Just because I’m afraid, doesn’t mean she has to…” His words died away.
She said nothing to change the topic, so he was forced to continue. “I wouldn’t be able to see where I’m going, and I would have to be led around like a child learning to ride.”
“That’s not such a bad thing, especially if you’re with people you enjoy.”
He took a deep breath. “I’m worried I’ll be thrown again.”
“You have every right to be worried,” she said.
“When Icouldcontrol the animal, I was thrown onto my head. A horse knows if you’re tentative, and tries to get away with what it can.”
“But a gentle mare…”
“Now you’re the one threatening my manliness.”
She giggled. “Well, think about it. I would be glad to take you somewhere in private and ride with you.”
With her innocent words, it all came rushing back, the taste of her skin, the heat between her thighs when he’d pressed himself there. He imagined her on top, riding him. Gripping the arms of his chair, he tried to sound mild as he said, “You’re getting good at saying one thing and implying another.”
“Oh!” She sounded shocked and puzzled at the same time. “You just assume everything has a hidden meaning. Now you really need to go. The door is to your left.”
He rose to his feet. “I know. So will our friendship survive?”
He heard her stand. “Is that what we have—a friendship?”
