Page 40 of Dangerous December
“That’s another easy way out for you,” she said flatly. “Platitudes and empty promises. But no, there won’t be another time. I nearly died in surgery. I lost my little girl. And I’ll probably never be able to have another baby, because of what they had to do to save my life.”
Dev felt sick to his stomach. She’d nearly died—nearly bled to death. And yet he’d already walked out on their marriage, and never knew. “I...I don’t know what to say.”
“Good, because I’m not quite done.” Her sad, quiet smile held no warmth. “I still grieve deeply for my baby. For many months, there wasn’t a day when I didn’t cry over her.”
“Oh, honey—"
“I can’t even begin to describe the crushing sense of loss, or how I felt during the darkest days. And even now.” She blinked away tears. “She’ll always live on in my heart. Always. I pray she’s the first person I see in heaven.”
His heart shattered at her words.
“After our last Christmas together, you never wrote. But two months after she died, I received an envelope in the mail. Not a letter from you, of course. It was your divorce papers.”
Dev flinched. “The lawyers...”
She waved a dismissive hand. “I’m sure they had no idea. They were just following your orders.”
He’d never wanted anything more in his life than a chance to enfold her in his arms. To comfort her...and himself.
But from her stiff posture, he knew she wouldn’t accept it. “I don’t know what to say. How can I make any of this better?”
“You can’t. My Lord and I have worked it out after a lot of prayer. How you handle it is up to you...if you care.”
“Care?”
She lifted a shoulder. “You were always adamant about not wanting to start a family. So where your emotions are in this, I couldn’t guess.”
She started for the door, then turned back.
“For the record, my mom insisted that you had the right to know about what happened. But as far as you’re concerned, the subject is now closed.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
A few minutes after Janet’s family returned to the waiting room, an intern appeared at the waiting room door.
“Good news,” he said with a wide smile. “Every last test looks great, and she can be released as soon as we get her discharge papers done. Baby looks fine.”
Beth hugged Janet’s father and sons. “Take good care of her, boys. And tell her not to worry about coming into the bookstore. I’ve got everything covered.”
Out in the parking lot, Beth debated about walking home, but Dev stood at the side of his Jeep, holding the passenger side open for her. With a sigh, she climbed in.
“What are you going to do?” he asked as he slid behind the wheel. “Since Janet won’t be back for a while?”
“Believe me, that’s the least of my worries.”
“Do you have anyone in mind?”
“I offered some part-time hours to Elana. I told her she could bring Cody along and let him read books or do homework while she works, and she’d have a chance to save more money. Perfect all the way around. But she wouldn’t give me an answer.”
“If I were a betting man, I wouldn’t give very good odds on her showing up.”
“I understand why she feels more secure working at the motel. It’s out of the way, and it’s quiet there during the day. There’s less chance of being seen. But this would be a good first step for her—a chance to get used to being out in public more.”
“Maybe so. I just hope there aren’t any deeper reasons for her being scared.”
They fell silent on the way to the bookstore. When Dev pulled to a stop at the curb, he turned to face her. “I feel like I just tooka mortar shell to my chest over what happened to you and the baby. I just wish—"
“I was serious, back in the waiting room. I didn’t tell you for sympathy or to make you feel guilty. I guess I finally agreed with my mother—that you had a right to know. Now, I’d better get some work done.”
