Page 32 of Stuck With You
I stare at the messages, not surprised he would text me in the middle of the night. It never changes. It’s all a game. I inhale and let it out, wanting to ignore him forevermore, but I can’t.
ME: We have nothing to discuss other than you following the orders. Don’t drag this into something it won’t ever be.
Even as I type, I know it’s as good as talking to a brick wall—carefully crafted, solid, and self-secure, but completely hollow inside.
Miles is waiting me out—dangling the fruit before me to see how long I’ll last before I break. He knows I can’t afford to get my attorneyinvolved, and I’ll do anything for Ollie and Frankie. He’s calling my bluff.
I squeeze my phone in my hand, wanting to throw it across the room. I don’t want a single thing from him, but Ollie needs speech therapy, and I have to be able to pay for things like car repairs, doctor’s appointments, food, and diapers. I’ve tried to get ahead and build some savings. But when you’ve been stripped of everything, including your friends and entire support system, that’s difficult to do.
I stare at the black text in my book, knowing it’s the end of the conversation for now. I attempt to read where I left off, but it’s no good.
I stand, my body tense with exhausted frustration. I reach into the cupboard for a cup, but my sleeve bumps a glass.
“Shit!” I scramble to catch it, but it crashes to the floor. I stare at the shiny shards scattered around my bare feet, shimmering in the light—a visual representation of my life.
Grover trots around the corner, and I hold out my hand. “Stay. Sit.” He stops and stares at me. “Sit.” He plops his butt on the ground in the doorway and his tail thumps against the floor.
A muffled cry rises, and I grab the dustpan and brush from under the sink, quickly sweeping up the mess before Frankie wakes Ollie. I dump the glass in the trash and scan my feet.
“Come on.” Grover follows, and I switch off the kitchen light.
Frankie stands in her crib, whimpering with her Lambie in one hand, two giant tears resting on her cheeks.
“Hey, Love Bug.” I lift her and hold her against my chest. “It’s ok.” I kiss her cheek. “Let’s change your dipe,” I whisper into her staticky hair.
I change her diaper and carry her to my room. Grover reclaims his spot at the end of Ollie’s bed as I lie down in mine. Frankie snuggles next to me, her face pressed into my neck.
I kiss her forehead, staring across the room at the array of ribbons glistening in the narrow beam of moonlight filtering through the blinds. “It’s all going to be ok,” I whisper.
I close my eyes, recognizing the patter of small feet followed by the click of nails.
“Mama.”
I crack one eye, and Ollie stands beside the bed. “Come on.” I move the sheet to the side and open my arm to him.
He climbs in, and Grover jumps onto the bottom of the bed. I wrap my arm around my little guy, and he burrows in.
“Let’s get some sleep, guys. We’ve got a big adventure tomorrow.”
______
I peel the small, sweaty hand from my face and am greeted by the soft morning light pouring through the blinds. I rub my eye with my free arm, noticing the foot wedged in my pit.
I carefully adjust the limbs sprawled around me. Grover’s head pops up as I curl up to search the nightstand for my phone, but it’s not there.
I wonder what time it is. My eyes flick around the room as I become aware of the golden glow and the fact that I couldn’t hear my alarm. I wiggle out of the confined space as Ollie murmurs and stirs.
Grover follows me down the hall and into the kitchen, where my phone buzzes with soft, melodic tones.Noooo.It’s seven fourteen, and the bus that routes to the grocery store will be at the stop in a little over an hour.
I rush back to my room, and Ollie sits up, rubbing his eyes. “We’ve got to get moving, bud, if you want to ride the bus today.”
I grab jeans and a sweatshirt from my small closet, then quickly brush my teeth and hair, pulling it back into a ponytail.
“Frankie. We’re going on b-b-bus today.” He leans close to her face as her eyes drift open and closed. “Come on.” He shakes her.
“Careful. Let her wake up.”
He hops off the bed.
