Page 32 of Ghosted
“Hey,” Dean says, using his hand to tilt my chin up. “Let’s just take it one moment at a time. I can see your mind working overtime right now. This doesn’t have to be complicated. We like each other, and we have a mutual goal. We can have both.” When he says it, he sounds so sure.
“For how long?” Our mutual goal ends with him leaving me for good. But, he deserves to get there, whereverthereis. I can’t be selfish about this.
A shadow crosses over his face. “As long as it takes. Let’s not think about the end yet. Let’s worry about right now. I didn’t do that enough in life, and I’ll be damned if I make the same mistake in death.”
I search his face, the lust taking a back burner to his sincerity. I think again about what Wren and Aunt Clarissa said. About deserving happiness, even if I know it has an expiration date. “Okay,” I say, and lean in towards him like a magnet drawn to an opposing pole. Our lips brush for a moment, and I try not to think about how much this will hurt to lose.
TWENTY
“Isit possible for your stomach to actually eat itself from nerves?” I ask Wren, slipping one of her hoops into my earlobe. She brought them to the store for me, swearing they were good luck. The last time she wore them, she won twenty bucks off a scratcher a customer gave her as a tip. And the time before that, she was the thousandth customer at the bakery down the street and got a month’s worth of free pastries.
She says her hoops will give me some good luck with my first few readings tonight. Wren can be sweet sometimes; it’s just always buried beneath miles of sarcasm. The first appointment called and cancelled, so I have a little more time to get ready. Which, to be honest, feels lucky to me.
“I mean, have you ever heard of ulcers?” Wren asks, bringing me back to the present. I squint at my appearance in the dingy store bathroom mirror. I don’t even know why I’m dressing up. No one is going to see me if all goes according to plan.
She comes behind me to adjust my hair. I’m fairly average height, and she’s got a couple of inches on me, including the three to four inches of her platform boots, so her head is cut off in our tiny mirror.
She uses the razor-sharp points of her nails to rake my hair back away from my face and secures it with a gold barrette that matches her earrings. “It’s going to be fine. No one will see you. Everyone tonight is a tourist anyway, right?”
I turn away from the mirror to face her. “Yeah, I think so. But what if no spirits come to me? They’re going to think I’m a fraud.” I pick at my already ragged cuticle, accidentally making it bleed a little.
Wren smacks my hand. “Stop that!” she chastises. She uses the hem of her black long-sleeve shirt to wipe the blood from my thumb. “If it doesn’t work out, oh well. You and Aunt Clarissa will think of something else to boost the shop. You aren’t a product, Rae.”
I scrunch my nose doubtfully. “I kind of am.”
Wren grumbles under her breath, and I’m fairly sure she’s cursing me. “Okay, but you can always back out. I know you love this store, but it’s all you’ve ever known. If this doesn’t work out, it doesn’t mean that you did anything wrong. And if you have to move on, you can. You’ll be okay.” She grips me firmly by the shoulders until I look at her.
I don’t want to even think about what would happen if we don’t make up the new monthly difference in profit. If I do, I’ll run to the bathroom with anxiety guts anddefinitelywon’t be able to do any readings. At least, not with my dignity intact.
I pull the conversational emergency rip cord and blurt, “I kissed Dean.”
“Huh?” she asks, dropping her hands from my shouldersand blinking heavily. “Yeah, after your date. Why are you bringing this up now?”
“Not just after our date. Like, last night.” I suck my lips in, watching her brain work to catch up with this out-of-left-field conversation.
“You can get freaky with ghosts now? Since when?”
“Uh, yesterday, I guess. I’ve never tried to touch another spirit, but it just sort of happened with him.”
She raises an eyebrow and snorts. “Well, damn. I guess you did take my advice.”
I feel my cheeks heat, and I press my cool palms against them. “No judgment,” I demand.
She raises her hands in mock surrender and snickers. I can’t help but laugh, too. “So what now?” she asks eventually.
The question immediately sobers me. “I mean, I don’t know. We’re not exactly staring down a future with picket fences and a puppy. I’m still going to help him move on, because he deserves to find peace. And I want to know what happened to him. He has a right to know, too. But, I guess in the meantime, we’ll just do what we want. Enjoy a small sliver of happiness.”
“Only you would start fucking the guy you’re also Nancy Drewing for. Oh my god. You’re NancyDoinghim!” She doubles over with laughter that sounds like a cat hacking up a furball. She’s not one to laugh outright often, so the muscle is a little atrophied.
I scowl at her, forcing my lips to stay in a thin line. “I’m leaving now.”
“Wait! I’m sorry,” she wheezes. She reaches out a claw and snags my shirt, stopping me before I can storm out of the room. “I’m happy for you, really. Good for you.”
I sigh and gently free my shirt from her grasp. “Thank you. And for the record, we aren’t sleeping together. We just kissed.”
“You aren’t sleeping togetheryet.I mean, think of the possibilities! The man doesn’t rely on gravity, Rae,” she says gravely.
“Kissing was hard enough. The amount of focus it took was intense. And when I lost concentration, I sort of fell through him,” I admit.
