Page 107 of Death on Riddle Road
“But he didn’t say anything,” I inserted.
“No, but Beverly said he appeared taken aback.Iassumedhe was taken aback by his doting mother criticizing him, but his reaction also fit himnotkeeping them away.Because Dova did the keeping apart.Another lie.So many lies,” Clara said.
“Her lying was part of the pattern, too.When we were talking with Robbie and Mamie the first time in that little sitting area and she arrived and said,Oh, I didn’t know you were all here.”
“A lie?”Ned asked.
“An unnecessary lie,” Clara elaborated.“I didn’t believe it at the time, but I never attached significance to it.”
“Me, either.It was inconsequential, so she hadn’t put much effort into it.But later, when I started to question things, it was also revelatory, because lying was her default response.”
“How could so many of us have believed her for so long?”Clara asked.
“She had a couple major advantages.First, her image as the generous, perfect mom to Robbie.I passed off a couple of her untruths as protecting him.And then there’s the more general advantage.Most people’s baseline is to believe that other people are telling the truth.”
I shared what I’d learned from Kit.
“She calls it the liar’s advantage.Once one lie is accepted, the person being lied to will perform mental gymnastics to reject evidence contrary to what they’ve accepted.”
“Because the person being lied to is gullible.”From Clara’s wrinkled nose, she put herself in that category.
“Not necessarily gullible.Think how many interactions a day you have with people, including strangers, and they are telling the truth — the dayiscold, they trulydidn’tmean to cut in front of you in line, the street you’re looking forisaround the corner.
“The bigger problem is not recognizing the lie afterward.We can have so much invested in the liar — time, love, faith, hope — they become part of our identity, so accepting that they’re not worthy of our trust scrapes against our self-esteem.It’s easier cognitively to disbelieve the evidence than it is to disbelieve the person we’ve believed in.”
“But Robbie did,” Ned said.“Smart kid.And brave.”
After nodding, I said, “I’d guess he started to disbelieve in corners of his mind well before this.But maybe he couldn’t let it come to the surface until he had Mamie in his life.”
“I wonder how long Mamie would have been for this world?’
Clara’s eyes popped wide.“Ned.”
“What?You think I can’t have suspicions, too?”
“Of course I don’t think that,” she said loyally.“And you’re absolutely right.Shewouldhave been a threat.”
That quieted all of us for a moment.
Then Clara exhaled sharply.“I thought it would help Robbie to know his father didn’t kill his mother.But now the poor kid has to deal with knowing the woman who raised him killed his birth mother.Andhis father.”
No denying that truth.
This sigh from her seemed to come from her toes.“Maybe we should have left this alone.Maybe in trying to help, we —I— made it worse.Because I was the one who pushed you.”
“You didn’t have to push hard.Besides, Teague encouraged us, too.No, I think we have to look at it as the truth coming out being better all around, including for Robbie.Eventually.”
DAY FIVE
DECEMBER 31
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
My index fingerhovered over my computer keyboard’s delete button.
I tapped it, removing the bus crash from the story.
It had done its job in getting me going.
