Page 34 of Shaded Amethysts
“Why?” Alex narrowed his eyes in my direction as if squinting would help him determine my suitability to be a parent.
I stalked across the room before turning to attempt to explain. “Look, I had a shitty childhood. My biological father left before I was born and my stepfather was an abusive asshole.”
When I paused, expecting to see a horrified look on Alex’s face, he looked perplexed when he asked, “So?”
“So… I don’t want to be anything like either of them!” I yelled a bit too loudly.
“You won’t,” Alex’s voice sounded confident, even though he’d just met me.
I glared at him. “How can you say that? You don’t even know me.”
“I know enough.” Alex asserted.
I gave him a disbelieving look, so he expanded. “I know that you’re the first man who has managed to win my kid-sister’s heart. That couldn’t have been an easy task because she’s a tough cookie. But she’s also a terrific judge of character.”
When I merely shook my head, Alex continued. “What’s even more impressive than that is the fact that my normally standoffish, often judgmental parents sing your praises. I love them both, but they can be rough on their kids’ love interests. In fact, my wonderful wife, Claire, didn’t win them over until we gave them their first grandchild. I don’t know how you managed to get them on your side after such a short amount of time, but either you’re a magical wizard or a phenomenal guy. I’m guessing it’s the latter.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle at the ridiculous suggestion that I may have ingratiated myself to his parents with witchcraft. Turning serious, I said, “Winning over your family doesn’t give me any qualifications to be a father.”
“None of us have any real qualifications to become parents. We just do it and figure it out as we go.” Alex assured me.
“But you have an excellent example of how to be a great dad from your own father. I don’t have anything like that,” I admitted.
Alex bugged his eyes out as if he was shocked by my statement. “You don’t?!? Look around you, man. You are a part of this town now, and we stick together. You are surrounded by fantastic fathers, who will be there to guide and assist you when you need help.”
I thought of Avery’s father, Alex, Grant, Levi, Dean, and all of the other dependable dads in Brunswick Bay Harbor. One thing I wouldn’t be short on while living here was terrific examples of how to raise a happy, healthy, and well-adjusted child.
“Speaking as one of this town’s fathers, who didn’t have a clue what he was doing at first, I can promise you one thing. You’re one of us now. We have your back, and we won’t let you fail.”
I let Alex’s reassuring words sink in. For the first time in my life, I began to consider the possibility that perhaps I could figure out how to be a great dad––with the right help. After pondering the tempting idea for a long moment, I shook my head and said, “I’m not ready to have kids, and I don’t know if I ever will be.”
“No one ever feels ready for that kind of life-changing responsibility, but holding your child in your arms for the first time makes you ready. In fact, I would say that feeling equipped for the job would be a sure sign that you weren’t actually prepared. Having a baby is a scary prospect, so it’s a good thing to be cautious and frightened. It shows that you’re realistic about the work required.”
Alex’s expression brightened as he continued, obviously thinking of his own children, “But it’s some of the most rewarding work you’ll ever do.”
I looked down at my living room carpet as I said, “I don’t know. It’s fun to think about the possibility, but I don’t want to ruin a child’s life.”
“The fact that you’re so worried about messing up proves that you won’t.” Leaning in as if he was sharing a big secret with me, Alex asked, “Do you know the best way to make sure your children grow up nurtured and feeling loved?”
“No.” I blinked at Alex, anxious for him to share his insight with me.
“The key is to make their mother happy, and you already have that mastered.” After uttering those sage words of wisdom, Alex left and closed my front door behind him.
30
Avery
Icould kiss my older brother’s cheek, but chances were high that he would cringe away and dramatically wipe it off. Somehow, Alex had managed to talk some sense into Gage.
While Gage wasn’t ready to start trying to make a baby right now, he was no longer completely closed off to the idea. That was all the opening I needed. I would wear him down, and having kids would make us both happier than either of us could imagine.
We were naked in his bed when Gage said, “I just hope I don’t turn out anything like the cruel monster that made my childhood miserable.”
I assured him with complete confidence. “You’re nothing like that awful man, and you never could be.”
The hope that sprang into his expression at my confident words was undeniable, so I added, “Would Jack have ever worried about his suitability to raise a child?”
“No,” Gage admitted with a sad chuckle.
