Page 68 of Promise of a New Beginning
“I’m trying to dissuade the oglers,” Jack said.
His mother laughed. “You haven’t changed one bit.”
“Jack, I’m a big girl. I can manage my own safety.” She looked around the café. “Besides, no one here is ogling besides that woman over there, and she’s not ogling me.”
Jack shook his head. He’d built so many walls around himself that he’d grown immune to glances from women. He looked over, and Siena was right; the pretty brunette in the corner of the café was definitely undressing him with her eyes. Jack turned away. He had eyes only for Savannah.
The waitress sat them on the other side of the café, and after they ordered lunch, his mother folded her hands on the table and narrowed her eyes at Jack. She had fine lines around her lips, which were pressed tightly together, but her eyes held the bright light Jack had always admired.
“So, do you want to talk about your father?” she asked.
“Mom, don’t ruin his day,” Siena said.
“It’s okay, honey,” he said to Siena. “Actually, I would, Mom. I’ve been racking my brain over this, and for the life of me, I cannot figure out why he’s still so angry with me. I apologized. I told him I handled things poorly. I took responsibility. What am I missing?”
His mother reached across the table and put her hand on his. “Jack, have you ever heard of Esther Loone?”
Jack shook his head.
“Who’s that?” Siena asked.
“We’ve never told any of you about this because it really had nothing to do with our family. But then again, nothing ever does…until it does.” She smiled. “What I’m going to tell you cannot go to your brothers.” She looked at Siena and narrowed her eyes. “Not even Dex, Siena.”
“I won’t tell him.”
“You’ve never been able to keep a secret from him,” she said.
“If it’s that important, maybe you shouldn’t tell either of us,” Jack pointed out.
“No. I’ve covered for your father for a very long time, and it’s time he deals with what he couldn’t so many years ago. I can’t sit back and watch our family divided any longer, Jack. I know how much courage it took for you to find your way back to us, and I’m sure much of that has to do with the new woman in your life.”
“Savannah,” Jack said, missing her more than ever.
“Yes, Savannah. She must have sparked something in you that reminded you of how beautiful love could be, and I’m thrilled by that, Jack. She must be very special.”
“And very patient to have gotten through all that anger you had,” Siena pointed out. She picked up her water and sipped it through a straw, ignoring the harsh glare her mother cast her way. She rested her head on Jack’s shoulder. “I love you whether you’re angry or not, but I can’t imagine falling for someone who was as angry as you.”
“Thanks, sis,” he said.
“You know what I mean.” Siena righted her head as the waitress brought their meals.
“Anyway, Esther and your father dated before we met. They were best friends for years, and it turned romantic. Esther got very sick and, well, she never made it past her eighteenth year. That was the year your father was to join the military. Well, you know your grandfather. There wasn’t much wiggle room with where your father’s future lay. He was never given the opportunity to mourn the loss of his best friend, and he could never do what you did, Jack. You took things into your own hands and threw caution to the wind. You took care of you instead of appeasing everyone else, and I admire you for that—even if it was the hardest thing a mother could watch her son go through.”
Guilt squeezed his heart again, but not so much that he lost sight of what his mother had just unveiled. “Do you think Dad is upset because I went away and he couldn’t or didn’t?”
“I think that might have something to do with it, yes. I don’t think he’s upset with you, necessarily. He just doesn’t know what to do with his own grief.” His mother reached across the table and touched his hand again. Her eyes softened.
Jack felt as if he were stuck. He had no idea how to fix things between him and his father, and it didn’t sound like his mother had the answers, either.
“I’ve missed you, Jack.”
“I’ve missed you, too, Mom. I’m sorry. I just didn’t know how to move forward. I thought everyone blamed me as much as I blamed myself.”
“I never blamed you, Jack,” Siena said.
“I know.” He put his arm around her and pulled her close. “Savannah has helped me to deal with a lot of that garbage. Mom, you’re right. She is a big part of why I’m finally taking the steps I should have taken a long time ago. She’s helped me break down the barriers I’ve put up between me and the rest of the world. But if what you’re saying is that Dad is upset because I did what he couldn’t, then I’m not sure how I can fix that.”
“Your father is stubborn, but he’s a loving man. I know you don’t always see the softer side of him, but it exists. Remember when you came back from your last tour and you were up for days on end worrying about the guys who were still over there?”
