Page 80 of Malliko
Tania nodded. “Ah, so you’re in that phase.”
“Which phase?”
“The sexual exploration phase.”
“Yes. I never had that and I’m curious. Malliko was kind enough to offer his support to ease my fear of meeting a maniac who would hurt me. I’m not sure I believe in love anymore, but I do want to experiment with my sexuality.”
Pouring another glass of soda, Tania said, “I get that. There’s empowerment in finding out what you like and what you don’t like. Just try to avoid falling in love with Malliko along the way. You’ll end up cursed like me.”
“Thank you for the warning but I always knew we weren’t headed for a relationship. After all, I thought he had you as his gorgeous fiancée.”
Tania sighed and leaned to the side, touching one of her many plants. “I think this one need water. Anyway, maybe he’s right that I’m projecting my broken heart onto others. If the arrangement between you two is working, then… why not? Just promise me that you won’t get pregnant with him.”
I angled my head. “Is that possible? I mean with us being from different species?”
“Yes, it’s possible. We’re descended from the same ancestors. I can’t say for sure, but I would think that any of the descendants of doom can cross-breed. My father is Eidron and my mother is human.”
“Oh.” The shock in my voice was accompanied by my wide-eyed expression. “You’re alien too?”
“I’m a hybrid. Growing up was, ehm… let’s just say it was challenging. Which is why I always emphasize to the researchers who come here that they should stay away from having sex with humans.”
Placing my hand on her arm, I spoke with empathy. “Things are starting to make a lot of sense now. I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you.”
Tania downplayed it. “It is what it is. There are some advantages to being half Eidron, but I have to say that it’s nice to be able to talk to you about it. I’ve never been able to share it with anyone outside of the program and maybe that’s why I don’t have too many friends. It’s a shame really.”
“What is?”
“That Malliko will cloud your mind and make you forget everything.”
“Maybe I could ask him not to.”
Tania turned serious and looked to the side. “Don’t do that. Your life will be much easier if you let him blur your memory before he goes. At one point, I asked my contact person with the Federation if she could put me in contact with an Ugon master. I wanted to have Soros erased from my memory. Someone like Malliko could probably make me think it was a dream or that Soros was a character from a book, but I don’t think that would be enough. It would have to be a master who can erase Soros from my memory completely.”
“What if he accidentally erases some other precious memory?”
“That’s the only reason I didn’t go through with it. And the fact that Ugon masters are hard to find and part of me clings to the memory of the time I had with Soros.” Her shoulder hung low and with a sigh, she added, “And at the same time I long to move on.”
“Believe me. I get that. I know what it’s like to feel stuck.” I sat back on Tania’s sofa. “That’s why I’m finally reclaiming not just my sexuality but my life. I’m going to do things that I’ve been afraid to do. And you know what?”
“What?” She gave me a smile.
“I’ve decided to leave Los Angeles. That means I won’t see any of the people who I might offend while trying out the new Clara.”
Raising her hand, Tania offered me a fist bump. “Go crazy and have some fun. You might inspire me to do the same.” Face lighting up, she said. “You know what we should do? We should go clubbing.”
“Clubbing?”
“Yes, it’s Saturday and I know just the place. We’ll bring Malliko. He can use the research and after all the surreal shit that’s been dumped on you today, I’m sure you could use a drink.”
“I could go clubbing,” I said because Tania was right that the prospect of getting a little buzzed felt enticing.
“Great. I haven’t had a fun night out for the longest time. Did you bring any clothes you could wear?”
I hadn’t thought of that but shook my head. “No. I only brought essentials.”
“Not a problem. I’m sure I have something you can wear. I’ll have us both looking dangerously sexy. Let’s go flirt with some hot men tonight and live life.” She laughed. “Human men, that is.”
CHAPTER 24
