Page 9 of Malliko
She lifted a hand to her hair. “You don’t like it?”
“It’s not that I don’t like it. I’ve just never seen someone so indecisive with their hair.”
“What are you talking about?”
“It’s like it’s long and short at the same time. Couldn’t you make up your mind?”
“That’s how it’s supposed to be. Short on the side and longer on top. It’s called an undercut.”
“Because it’s cut under and not above.” I laughed at my own humor.
“What about yourself? When was the last time you had a haircut?”
“Yesterday. I used to have short hair as a soldier, but I grew it out while I studied. This style is supposed to match the style on Earth.”
“In what century? No, actually, you remind me a celebrity who is in a lot of movies.”
When I gave her a blank stare she explained, “He’s big and muscly like you and some women fawn over him.”
“Then why would looking like him be a bad thing?”
“Because we don’t want to repeat what happened when my father visited Earth.” She raised her eyebrows. “Right?”
“I’m not here to have sex. I’m here to work,” I said slowly and clearly in the hopes that she would finally understand. It was evident that she wasn’t full Eidron or I wouldn’t have had to repeat myself. Maybe this was what Cacala had meant when she warned me that humans were slow.
Tania gave me a skeptical glance that I ignored. Changing the subject, I asked. “I understand there’s a mechanism on Earth that all the locals have to live under. Can you explain to me what ego is exactly?”
Tania looked over her shoulder before changing lanes on the road and taking a big turn onto another road.
“Did you hear me?” I asked.
“Yes, but I have to get this right. Give me a second. If I miss our exit, we’ll be in this car even longer.”
Two minutes later, she exclaimed, “Okay, we’re good. So, what was your question? Oh, right, ego. Yes, outsiders always struggle to understand what it’s about, but from what I understand it’s part of the agreement for anyone who reincarnates to planet Earth. The ego’s purpose is to give the illusion that we’re separate individuals instead of one.”
“But how do you see it?”
“What do you mean? It’s not a physical thing, Malliko. It’s a restriction of your mindset. You’ll see it clearly in people’s behavior.”
“Do you have an ego?”
Tania nodded. “Yes. I was born here, and I definitely have an ego. Sometimes I envy you full blooded Eidrons for not having one, but at least I’m aware that it’s meant to serve me.”
“Serve you how?”
“The ego is like fuel to a car, you know.”
“No, I don’t understand.”
“Right… ehm, it’s difficult to explain but sometimes you Eidrons and other ETs are a little too content for my taste. We humans experience envy and that gives us motivation to compete to be better and do better. Have you ever felt envy?”
I thought about it. “I’m not sure what you mean by that. In general, I wish others the best.”
“Yeah, yeah, but haven’t you ever wanted something and then someone else got it and it annoyed you?”
“Of course. That’s natural. But I’m still happy for the other person as well.”
Tania wrinkled her nose. “That’s what I mean. Humans are more cut-throat and extreme in their emotions, and I appreciate that. My years on the hybrid planet were some of the most boring in my life. Everyone was so annoyingly balanced and well mannered. I missed the drama of school on Earth. At least it was entertaining.”
