Page 48 of The Heir
“Hell no. The French are proud to be perverted.” Indiana stopped talking and then corrected himself. “No, wait, I shouldn’t say it like that because in their eyes there’s nothing perverted about sex in any shape or form.”
“Surely there must be limits.”
“Anything that is legal goes. So, as I told the first group of Explorers, as long as you keep away from kids, animals, and rape you’re fine.”
“Do you miss living here?”
Indiana thought about it. “It’s funny you should ask, because while we were here, I longed to go back to our culture, nature, and family and friends. But now that it’s been six months since we left France, I’m starting to miss aspects of life here. This is the place where Aubri finally saw me as more than her friend. I’ll never forget all the crazy sex we had in that tiny apartment. Not to mention that the adventures we went on with our team were magical.
“Now I have to share her with the world, and with the pregnancy we can’t have the same wild sex as we used to. Hmm, come to think about it, maybe it’s not so much France that I miss but the honeymoon phase of my life with Aubri.”
“It’s sweet how much you love her.”
Indiana smacked a palm to his chest. “I’ve been in love with her for so many years and I don’t see that ever changing.” Pointing to a narrow side street, Indiana instructed. “That way.”
From the outside the antique store looked as enchanting as Indiana had described. It was made to imitate a shop from half a millennium ago with cute paned windows and exhibited objects that looked foreign and strange to me.
An old-fashioned bell rang when Indiana opened the door and called out with glee. “Helmes, you smelly fart, did you miss me?”
Moving to the door, I saw a shopkeeper break into laughter and rush to give Indiana a manly hug. “Indy, my friend. We’re seeing your ugly face on the news every day and I was hoping you would have time to stop by.”
“Linea, this is Helmes. He and I are business partners.”
“Business partners?”
“Yes. Remember how I told you that my team of Explorers would retrieve valuables from the outside of the fence? Now I have the new Explorers do the same. They bring it all here and then Helmes fixes the unfixable.”
The rangy man spoke with a strong accent. “Oh, I try.”
“You’re a miracle worker, my friend.” Waving his arm, Indiana encouraged me to look around. “See everything on the shelves? Isn’t it beautiful and nostalgic? People in the Northlands will love it once we get Helmes a permit from his government to export.”
“Is that what Thor and Freya were fighting for today?”
“Yes. We can’t straight up tell the French how valuable the antiques would be in the Northlands or they would come up with some silly tax on Helmes’ products. But if we can get the French to buy some more things from us, we could expand the shipping route between our countries. My dad and I are planning to introduce Northlanders to French fashion and lots of pre-war charm.”
While the two men talked, I browsed around and took in the curiosities on the shelves. With some of the things I had no idea what they were. Picking up a small, flat metal thing, I turned it in my hand. “I’m sorry, but what in the world is this?”
Helmes tried to explain in English but didn’t know the proper words. After a little bit of searching he said, “It’s for opening food cans.” He pointed to some cans on the shelf next to me.
I didn’t think before I wrinkled my nose up. “People still eat food from back then? Is that safe?”
The men laughed. “No, silly. It’s just fun to have something from the old world, don’t you think?” Indiana held up one of the cans that had a dent in it. “I reckon we can sell these as collector’s items for a fortune.”
“Do you know what’s in it?”
He moved the can closer to his face and squinted his eyes. “All the writing is faded, but I believe it might be corn.”
“And you plan to make cans of corn the next must-have item in the Northlands?”
He put the can back and grinned. “Aubri was skeptical as well, but I have a sense for these things. You just wait and see.”
“All right.” I searched on and found more things with functions I couldn’t figure out. But then there were a pair of black sunglasses that looked in good shape. Picking them up, I turned them in the air. “I thought pre-war people were technologically advanced compared to us. Where’s the zoom or camera function on these?”
“Oh, I was the one who found those sunglasses.” Indiana came and took them out of my hands and put them on. “That was a good day. Aubri, Banni, Val, and I found a store with an untouched and well-protected storage room. Helmes thinks that these glasses date back all the way to the late twentieth century. Isn’t that crazy?” He put the glasses on me and stepped back. “Not bad, Miss MacCumhail. They go well with the shape of your face. Do you want me to get them for you?”
“You don’t have to.”
“Why not? Wouldn’t it be a fun memory from France? Maybe Helmes has a pair for Aubri as well.”
