Page 75 of The Outcast
I crossed my arms. “Huh. You seem older. I’ll be twenty-eight and I thought we were the same age. Look, I’m the last person to talk to you about marriage, I’m still trying to figure the whole thing out myself.”
He looked at me. “Yeah, I know. You think marriage is modern slavery or some shit. Aubri told me as much.”
“Have you ever been in love?” I asked Thor.
He shrugged. “What does that even mean? I’ve seen women I found beautiful, but the way Mason behaves around Belle or that crazy attraction Indiana has to my cousin isn’t something I’ve experienced myself.”
“Hmm…”
Thor looked at me. “I believe in love, though. My parents have a close bond and although they’re opposites in many ways, they share this untouchable closeness that I envy.”
“Do you think someone like me could be happy in a marriage?”
Thor raised his gaze from his foot to meet my eyes. “You? What do you mean? I thought you people had laws against marriage.”
“We do, but if I moved here, like Belle.”
His brow lowered as he watched me closely.
“I’ve fallen in love, Thor.”
Jerking his head back, he snapped. “With me?”
I broke into deep belly laughter. “Nooo. You vain fool, it’s not all about you.”
His shoulders eased up and he grinned a little. “Good, because that would be awkward.”
“I’m in love with Sparrow.”
“Huh. When did that happen?”
I thought about it. “Good question. The first time I saw her was when Aubri showed me a picture of Sparrow last year. I couldn’t stop staring at her. She was the most stunning woman I’d ever seen. Aubri talked about her a lot and so when I met her last summer, I already had a good impression of her. What I didn’t expect was how magnetic and kind she would be.”
“Who, Sparrow?” Thor wrinkled his nose. “I’ll give you that she’s good-looking, but magnetic and kind is a far stretch. She and Aubri are wildcats.”
“She’s kind to me.”
“Does she feel the same? Do you know if she’s in love with you too?”
“She says that she is,” I breathed. “Just talking about our love is hard for me.”
“Why?”
“Because I associate it with danger and immaturity.”
Thor scoffed, “Pst, that’s horse shit. If I ever fall in love, I’ll claim my woman and scream it to the world. Love is power.”
“See it’s so easy for you, but to me it feels like a weakness. When Sparrow got kidnapped it felt like…” I shook my head, unable to form into words the terror I’d experienced. “Like I could never in my life be happy again if something happened to her.”
Thor was watching me as I spoke about her kidnapping. “Wow, I had no idea you were that much in love with Sparrow. I see the pain on your face when you talk about losing her.”
“The problem is that I have no cluehowto love her. I mean, obviously, I have the physical part down, but the rest.” I bit my lip and placed my elbows on the rope behind us that served as the lower part of a railing to the boxing ring. “Even if we could find a way to be together, I’m terrified that I’ll mess up and hurt her.”
“You’d better not. Sparrow has been hurt enough.”
“No, I don’t mean physically hurt her, but what if… I mean, I’ve never had someone be faithful to me and vice versa.”
Thor groaned and scratched his stubble. “I don’t know what to tell you. In a way, that’s the same for me. I’m well aware that I could easily find a wife – who wouldn’t want to be with the future ruler? – but that’s not me.”
