Page 56 of Nathan
I looked away, not liking his confrontational manner.
“Let me ask you this; how much money do you think it’ll take to buy back the integrity you sold, or the reputation you tarnished?”
“I’m not gonna answer that.”
“You can give me the stink-eye all you want, but I’m telling you the truth here. There’s an old saying that success should always be measured against the price you pay for it. You’ve heard that before, haven’t you?”
“Mhmm.”
“So let me ask you this: would you have signed that contract with the film studio again, knowing what you know now? And if so, what amount of dollars would be enough for you to feel good about hiding in a forest while the media defiles your reputation and trashes your name?”
I pouted as Nathan continued,
“Right now, you and I are tools for them to sell magazines and be successful at what they do. In that sense, they’re the same as you.”
I snapped at him. “Don’t compare me to those blood-sucking piranhas.”
“Believe me, I’m no fan of the press either, but as I see it, you used them to help you sell the lies that you, Storm, and the film studio came up with. Storm is still using them. The only reason you don’t like it this time is because it’s at your expense, and it’s no longer convenient.”
“Are you calling me a hypocrite?” I didn’t wait for his answer. “Why did you want me to come if you think so little of me?”
“Because…” Nathan drew in a deep breath. “Because…”
I waited for him to finish his sentence, but he just shook his head.
“Tell me,” I pushed.
He looked severe when he muttered, “It’s better if I don’t.”
Turning my body toward him, I gave a hard stare. “With all the crap you’ve just told me about my horrible character, why stop now? Why am I here, Nathan?” My tone was dripping with the humiliation I felt inside.
He rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I’ve been having some trouble this year that has to do with you.”
My hackles rose as I prepared mentally for another attack, but his voice was softer when he spoke.
“I haven’t met a single woman that excites me.”
“What do you mean?”
Nathan crossed his arms and uncrossed them again before brushing off his pants and clearing his throat. “After the trip to Spain, I’ve met plenty of women, but not one that I want to spend time with or have… uhm, anyway, it’s like on a subconscious level I compare them to you, and they all fall short.”
My battered soul clung onto that compliment as if it were the last lifeboat on theTitanic. “What do you mean they fall short?”
“I can’t explain it because some of the women I’ve met were gorgeous, well educated, and funny. And yet, it’s like I have no room for them here.” Nathan touched his chest.
“But it’s been nine months since we went to Spain and nothing happened between us… well, except for...” I chewed on my lip, remembering the last day where there had been a short moment that went beyond the usual flirtatious banter.
“You mean that moment by the river?” Nathan asked.
“Mhmm.” Nathan and I had been tasked with washing up after breakfast on the last day, and at one point, when he handed me a plate, we stood locked in a deep connection and smiled at each other. I took the plate, and then Nathan’s hand lifted to tuck a strand of my hair behind my ear. I was sure he was going to kiss me then, but the instructor had interrupted us. After that, there had been no more opportunities for intimacy.
“I wanted to kiss you that day,” he said.
“I know.”
Nathan lowered his brow and picked up one of the pieces from the twig that I’d broken. “It’s not that I haven’t tried to forget you since January, it’s just hard when you’re front and center on every damn magazine cover.”
“You tried to forget me?”
