Page 129 of The Warrior
It’s too late, she doesn’t love you anymore. It’s better to stay away than have her pity you.
Pride made me sit down again and kick at the small table in front of me. I fucking hated this cabin and its crappy furniture. I wanted my suite with a nice bathroom and a comfortable bed.
Even if Laura divorces you, it’s better to go back than live in this shithole.
I stood up again, pushing my unruly hair back. My stomach was growling for food and the thought of going hunting in the snow was depressing. What I wouldn’t give for a shower, some decent food, or a hug from Laura.
I wished that I weren’t too fucking proud to go back.
If only pride were a physical opponent I could fight. Tearing the door open, I walked outside in the cold and screamed out my despair. Bending forward, I clenched my fists and emptied my lungs in a soul-wrenching scream that had me almost blue in the head from a lack of oxygen.
Birds lifted from the trees and took flight. For a second I wished I had wings and could escape too.
“I hate you, I hate you.” My words were directed at my pride and an eerie laughter from within filled my head.
You’re not going anywhere. You would rather rot here, than admit that you were wrong, and we both know it.
“I’m not staying here.”
Images of my brother with Pearl as his co-ruler made me groan and pride laughed again.
You’ll be Pearl’s little errand boy if you go back.
I’d never fought a greater opponent or felt this beaten in my life. Pride was a sadist that taunted me with the power he held over me, pushing at every sore wound.
In return, I focused on Laura, Mila, and the few other people I loved. I would never see them again as long as I stayed here. Falling to my knees, my scream of pain morphed into a sob accompanied by snot and tears.
Pride mocked me:Real men don’t cry, Magni.
“Shut the fuck up,” I hissed. With the amount of pain I was in, I almost expected the snow around me to be red with blood, but pride didn’t leave any trace in the white snow. With an evil laugh, Pride whispered back,Laura chose the Motherlands – you weren’t enough.
“I hate you,” I repeated.
I’m just protecting you my friend.
“No.”
Stay here where no one can hurt you again.
It took everything I had to push back and ignore all the worst-case scenarios playing in my mind. Sucking in air as a fuel, I got up from the ground. “I’m going back,” I declared.
Don’t be stupid. You’ll be ridiculed.
Dusting snow off my pants, I muttered, “I might be crazy enough to talk to myself, but I’m not stupid enough to stay in this miserable place for the rest of my life.”
CHAPTER 33
Late Night Talks
Laura
Mila was sleeping with her head in my lap, and my fingers played with her long blonde hair.
“Do you want me to carry her to her bed?” Marco asked me.
It was only Shelly, Marco, Archer, Kya, and me left at the table and it was late. Mila had come in because of a nightmare, and I’d let her fall asleep in my lap.
“That’s nice of you, Marco, but give me a few more minutes with her.”
