Page 131 of Black
CHAPTER 24
Desperate Times
Cia
The moment I saw Gabriel I felt like I had been punched in my stomach. Why hadn’t he grown a humongous beard or gotten a beer belly or something? Why did he have to look as darn handsome as he ever did and why did he have to look at me like he had just found a long-lost treasure?
I was rude. I realized that, but what choice did I have? It would have been so easy to fall for the illusion that we could have it all. But I wouldn’t. Not this time. I was finally getting back on my feet, and with the money I was making on selling paintings through Darren and my street art, I was able to support myself. Of course it helped that I lived with Violet, who didn’t charge much rent for her couch.
Although I’ve known Violet for about three years we hadn’t been close until now. As Black I was never close to anyone, Daniel being the exception. But as Cia, I’m softer and more open to letting others in. In small doses.
Violet is freaky, though. She’ll say things that I have no clue how she knows. Some days she almost has me convinced that her psychic abilities are real, but then I kick myself for being so naïve.
I haven’t forgotten about the spooky cleansing she did in Daniel’s apartment. Daniel is convinced she’s the real thing, but the more I think about it, the more it seems likely that she could have known the name of the man living there, what he did for a living, and even how he committed suicide. I mean, Daniel must have given her his address and that would have given her time to look it up… if she has access to the right IT systems.
But who am I to judge how she makes her money? I’ve hustled people in the past and stolen things, so if some gullible schmuck wants to pay Violet to read their future, talk to some dead relative, have a house clearing, or tell them the name of their spirit guides, then peace to them.
All I know is that Violet is the kindest and most generous person I know. She always does her best to make me feel better when I’m having a bad day. And I’ve had a lot of bad days after I lost Gabriel.
Some say it’s better to have loved and lost, but I say it’s better to live in ignorant bliss. The pain of having your illusions crushed will break you.
I think I would have broken too, if not for Violet.
But I’m still here… working, living, existing, and hoping that, someday, Gabriel won’t be the first thing I think about in the morning and the last before I go to bed.
I was annoyed that Violet allowed him to help her carry her things to the car and I insisted on carrying my own. You can’t both ask a man for his help and at the same time tell him to leave you alone, and I certainly didn’t want to send him any mixed signals. I had trusted him once and he had blown it. As far as I was concerned we were better off walking our separate ways.
When we finally got all our gear packed into Arion I got into the passenger seat without as much as looking at Gabriel, who stood on the sidewalk. I kept my eyes straight ahead and was fully focused on not showing how affected I was by his presence.
“Thanks for the help,” Violet called out to him and got behind the wheel.
“Let’s go! Hurry up and get this old thing moving.” I muttered, harsher than I intended.
Violet gave me a reproachful glance and stroked the steering wheel. “I’m sorry, Arion, Cia didn’t mean to offend you. We would appreciate if you could get us safely home.”
She turned the key in the ignition and it cranked but didn’t fire up. Violet turned the key again and it was the same thing.
“See, I’ve told you not to talk poorly about Arion.”
That’s when I lost it. “Will you stop talking about this car as if it’s alive? This is an old crappy car, not some Greek stallion with magical powers. Normal people don’t name their cars and they certainly don’t speak to them.”
Violet narrowed her eyes. “I’m sorry if you were under the impression that I’m normal.”
Of course Gabriel chose that exact moment to tap on the window. “Is everything all right?” he asked.
I covered my face with both my hands, feeling the need to scream.
“He won’t start,” Violet said and got out of the car talking to Gabriel about what could be wrong. I stubbornly stayed in the car until Gabriel got in to try and start Arion. That made me get out.
“It’s probably the battery. Have you had issues with it before?” Gabriel asked.
“No, Arion never gives me trouble.”
“Don’t worry, I have a portable jump-starter in my car.”
“Great, can you go and get it?” Violet asked him.
Gabriel looked at me. “Sure, if Cia walks with me so we can talk. It’s only a few blocks from here.”
