Page 48 of Our Shattered Pieces
Curled up in one of the plush leather chairs in Lorcan’s office, I looked over at my brother, sitting behind his desk, looking confident and strong, and I wondered how many times he was going to have to save me from myself.
“I fucked up, Lorcan,” I confessed.
He let out a deep breath. “Does this have anything to do with Grayson?”
I wasn’t surprised. Rowan had already told me that everyone had known about the night of the wedding, and even if Lorcan hadn’t suspected, I imagine Rowan had gone home and told him the business the day she and Mystic had visited me at my office. Not that I minded. Rowan knew how close me and Lorcan were. I didn’t view it as breaking my confidence, no matter what she might have told him.
“What all did Rowan tell you?”
“Not much,” he replied. “We all knew you guys disappeared the night of the wedding, but since you’re both grown adults, it really wasn’t any of our business.” He shrugged. “I figured you’d tell me when you were ready.”
“Did she tell you we talked the other day?”
Lorcan nodded. “She told me that you guys hadn’t been dating this entire time, which was what we had all believed, but that you guys hooked up again last week, and shit kind of went south.”
I wiped away a tear that snuck out. “This is going to get uncomfortable, Lorcan,” I told him, knowing he knew exactly what those words meant.
“I figured it might,” he grumbled as he ran his hands down his face.
I sat there for a long minute before uncurling myself from the chair and standing up.
I couldn’t do this.
I couldn’t do this to Lorcan again.
There was being close with your brother, and then there was crossing the line, and I’ve already crossed it once, never taking responsibility for what Lorcan might have had to deal with, knowing what he knew about me. Lorcan shouldn’t know the things he knew about me, and I wasn’t about to cross that line again.
“You know what?” I said, my voice cracking. “I…I think I’ll just…make an appointment to talk to som-”
Lorcan stood up from his desk chair. “What? Wait. Hold on, Molly,” he rushed out, coming out from behind his desk. “What…what are you talking about?” he asked, now standing in front of me.
My eyes began to water, and I did my best to hold it together. “I can’t do this to you again, Lorcan,” I told him. “I…it’s not fair to you, and-”
“Whoa, hold up,” he interrupted. “You’re my sister. There’s nothing you can’t tell me, Molly Doll.”
“But you shouldn’t know this stuff about me, Lorcan!” I cried, the tears spilling. “It’s so goddamn humiliating.”
Lorcan gathered me up in his arms, and I held on as he said, “I agree, Molly. There are things I shouldn’t know about you. But, Christ, I’d rather know them than have you slit your wrists because you felt you didn’t have anyone to talk to.” His arms tightened around my body. “I just want you happy, Molly.”
“I…I…I don’t know how to tell him, Lorcan,” I finally confessed. “How do I tell him something so awful about myself and still expect him to want to be with me?”
“The same way a man gets the courage to ask a woman out, even knowing there’s a chance she’ll say no,” he replied.
I pulled back, and I must have looked awful, because Lorcan stepped back to grab me a tissue from his desk. “Thank you,” I mumbled when he handed it to me.
“Molly-”
I looked at my brother. “It’s not the same thing, Lorcan.”
His face softened. “Actually, it is,” he said. “Rejection is rejection, Molly Doll. No matter how low or high on the scale, it’s still rejection. If you tell Grayson the truth, and he decides he can’t handle it, then you choose friendship.”
“Could you…what if Rowan told you something…”
Lorcan straightened to his full height, and I could see so much seriousness in his grey eyes. “There is nothing Rowan could tell me that would change the way I feel about her.”
“Nothing?”
“Nothing,” he reiterated. “I don’t just love her beautiful pieces, Molly. I love all of her.”
