Page 22 of Our Shattered Pieces
However, as I got older, my views grew with me. Counseling, now, for me was more of a regular mental checkup I did for myself twice a year. As I went from being twenty-two to thirty-two, I’ve come across women who have been mature enough to not take everything so personal. While I still checked my demons at the door, hair-pulling, ass spanking, and a few other little things have happened in the bedroom, and that’s been enough to get me by.
My issue was the fact that I taught children. Even though some of them might reach the age of eighteen before graduation, they were still children in my eyes. I taught and coached them, and I didn’t need it getting around that I was into dark, degrading, kinky, filthy sexual pleasures.
I’d lose everything.
Never mind that, over the course of my career, I’ve earned a reputation of one of the finest teachers in the state, even winning a few awards for some of the things I’ve done. Never mind that I’ve turned out several NFL phenoms over the years. Never mind that I came from a good family, and that my sister just married into the Cavanaugh family six months ago. Sexual proclivities, if dark and going against the grain of what was mainstream-acceptable, could ruin a person to the point of no return. And I’ve worked too hard for everything I had to lose it all because of my dick.
And it wasn’t even about the sex, really. There were millions of hookup sites out there that I could join just to get my dick wet in a particular manner. There were millions of fetishes out there, and the internet has created a home for them all, so, it wasn’t about that.
It was about trust.
I could easily find a woman adventurous enough to let me rub my cum on her tits or tap her face with the head of my dick. I could easily find a woman who’d let me slide inside her ass on the first night. I could easily find a woman who’d let me call her filthy names. Again, the internet.
What I wanted to find was a woman who I could trust to let me do all that stuff, and more, and not take everything she finds out about me to the local media if I do something to piss her off. I needed to know she’s not the type to ruin my life if the relationship ends badly.
Trust was what was missing from those websites.
And even if I did go all stupid and get NDAs involved, what good would suing her do if she did tell? Would it resurrect my career from the ashes? Would it make people see me asnota pervert? Would it erase what people would know about me?
No.
Besides, who in the fuck wanted legal paperwork between them in order to fuck? When I think about how there hadn’t been any paperwork, save for the marriage license, between my sister and her husband, and his wealth was unimaginable, how stupid was it to bring in NDAs just to get laid?
Sticking to my tried and true and being happy with what I had going for me, I wasn’t going to bemoan about what I was missing.
Besides, I was a guy.
All pussy was good pussy.
Chapter 17
Molly~
“Wow.” I let out a low whistle. “The Greek Cyclades. Faaaannncy.”
“She’s never been,” Lorcan simply stated.
Stretched out on the couch in his study, Lorcan sat at his desk, working as usual, finishing up some last-minute details before whisking Rowan away on their long overdue honeymoon.
When Lorcan and Rowan had finally gone official, she’d been on vacation from work as a corporate auditor. And Lorcan-not Rowan-had gone all anniversary-stupid and had wanted to celebrate their official one-year anniversary. For their honeymoon six months ago, he had taken her to the Maldives in South Asia, and now that she had next week off, Lorcan was taking her to the Greek Cyclades.
“I have news for you, Lor, millions of people have never been,” I quipped. “That’s rich people shit.”
“Says a rich person,” he quipped back.
“Not as rich as you,” I sing-songed.
Lorcan just chuckled. “But still richer than eighty percent of the country,” he pointed out.
I wrinkled my nose. “That’s mostly my inheritance,” I replied.
“It’s still yours, Molly Doll,” he said dryly. “And that makes you rich.”
I ignored that. Sure, I had money, but I was careful with it. The extravagant galas and charity events I put on were to make the donors comfortable in their own element. It wasn’t for me. In my line of work, I’ve seen too many people struggling to be better and have better that I didn’t flaunt my money around. I lived in a nice condo that was located in a nice neighborhood, and drove a nice car, and wore nice clothes. But my fingers weren’t adorned with diamond rocks and I didn’t walk around Chicago in a tiara. I did my best to balance both the worlds I lived in.
And speaking of nice things. “So, you lured me with lunch and quality time, all just to ask me to water your plants while you’re gone?” Lunch had come and gone, but I was still lounging around like I lived here.
“If you can be lured with a simple turkey wrap and iced tea, you’re a real threat to national security, Molly,” Lorcan joked.
