Page 20 of Our Shattered Pieces
We talked about what I needed versus what I wanted.
We talked every other week about all that stuff and more, and I was still the same man I was when I had started this shit.
Part
II
Chapter 15
Molly – (Ten Years Later)~
People thought charity work was easy because it was optional. They figured because you didn’thaveto offer your time and services, how hard could it be? But then, if that were the case, why did people write checks more than they offered their time or services?
Because charity work was hard as hell, that’s why.
And if you thought those same ‘selfless’ people writing checks weren’t judging the food, décor, venue, drinks, waitstaff, the patterned tiled floor? Well, you’d be wrong. Because they did.
Charity galas and events were very rarely attended by people who really cared about the project. Most of them were attended by people who needed a tax break or wanted to be seen in the elite social circles of Chicago.
So, why would I do this to myself?
Because, even from a young age, I’d always been about encouraging women to help lift up the woman next to her.
Growing up at the top of the food chain, I had been able to slide through life without being bullied or harassed, if I didn’t count that one time in college. However, I’d seen a lot of it happen as it typically does in high school, and I had never been the type of person to let that slide. I’d had blogs, support groups, and had even done some freelance editorials, all with the purpose of helping females see the potential inside themselves.
And now, a million years later, I was doing charity work for several different women’s groups. And though exhausting at times, I really loved it. Well, except when Lorcan referred to my projects as new jobs. He always made it sound as if I couldn’t hold down a job.
The jerk.
After graduating from UC Berkeley, I had come back to Chicago. Having always been close to my family, it was hard to imagine living anywhere else. And with Lorcan Sr. and Emilia Cavanaugh being part of the Chicago wealthy, doors had opened for me and Lorcan easily.
Now, don’t get me wrong here. Even with the last name that was attached to our first, we’ve both worked our assess off for what we’ve accomplished, Lorcan more so. The man worked around the clock. Or, rather, he used to until he married Rowan six months ago. Now the man actually acted human instead of a million-dollar-making machine.
The CEO of Cavanaugh Industries, Lorcan had more money than God, and his status in this city was also cemented as that of a god. Powerful, compelling, wealthy, and vicious, if need be, Lorcan Cavanaugh was everything he had been meant to be. And now, married to Rowan, he had it all, and I couldn’t be happier for him.
And with him and Rowan being godparents to their best friends’ twins, I’d bet my ass that I’ll be an aunt soon, and I couldn’t wait. It was all about spoiling a kid that wasn’t yours and not having to deal with the negative effects of said spoiling.
Lorcan was my best friend, and the person I was closest to on the planet. I loved my brother, and his happiness mattered to me more than my own. A temperamental little shit when he was younger, he’s come a long way since we were young, and it had been a special like of joy to finally see him get everything he’s ever wanted. Especially, considering that he had chased Rowan for over a year before she had caved.
A baby was definitely coming sooner rather than later.
As for me, after my disastrous freshman year in college, I’d manage to make the most of the remaining three, and I had come out of it better for it.
Things had been tense between Lorcan and I for a while after I had confessed my sins to him, but that had been because of me, not him. I had grappled with the shame and embarrassment for a long time, but with the help of counseling, I’d manage to be able to have a serious heart-to-heart with him, where he had stood by me once again. No judging. No trying to change me. No being embarrassed. No anything from my brother, and that had been everything.
There was also the fact that he had beaten Sawyer and Calvin so badly, they had bore the damage for over a week after Lorcan had gotten a hold of them.
And Ethan?
Ethan had been so brutalized that he’d had to walk around with a cane for almost a year after Lorcan had found him. He’d been in the hospital for over a month and had missed the last two months of the semester. It hadn’t been until the start of my sophomore year that I’d finally seen Ethan again, and he’d been using a cane.
He also never spoke to me again.
As for my proclivities, they still existed. Not necessarily the need for multiple partners, but I still wished for the verbal filth and degradation of having a man use me. I still wished to be called names and I still wished for the freedom to be able to ask for all those things.
But I didn’t.
I never did.
