Page 22 of If You Could Only Believe
“Y…you…” I tried to clear the tears from my throat. “You know you don’t have to stick around,” I muttered. “Thank you for the bath, but I can…you don’t have to…”
His hand reached under my chin and he lifted my gaze to his. The second the wetness registered, his face fell, and he looked worried. “Sophia, I’m so sorry,” he said, earnestly. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. If you-”
“You didn’t hurt me,” I stopped him. “Well, I mean you did. But it was a good kind of hurt,” I whispered.
“Then what’s wrong, baby?”
The tears fell as I confessed, “Standing next to you makes me feel foolish and all the reasons you shouldn’t be here with me become glaringly obvious.”
His jaw clenched, but he didn’t comment on my confession. Instead, he just grabbed my hand and led me to the bathroom where a bathtub full of bubbles was waiting for us.
Michael helped me get in and then climbed in behind me. I was fat, and he was over six feet, so it was a tight squeeze, but we managed. It took a couple of minutes for me to finally relax against him and just lay back and enjoy the heat of the water.
But the silence was killing me. “Are you mad at me?”
He wrapped his arms around my torso, right underneath my boobs, and sighed. “No, baby, I’m not mad at you. It just bothers me that you don’t see yourself the way I do.”
“And how do you see me?” I wanted to know. I mean, he was obviously attracted to me enough to do the deed, but I didn’t know Michael-like,at all.Maybe he was the kind of guy who liked sex with whoever was willing to give it to him. The thought made me slightly sick.
“Promise you won’t freak out if I tell you something?”
Soooooooooooooo not encouraging.“I promise,” I agreed because my curiosity was stronger than my apprehension.
“What I’m about to tell you is the God’s honest truth, and if you need to verify it with my brothers and sisters, I won’t blame you.”Jesus. How bad was it?“When I look at you, Sophia, I see everything I’ve been waiting for.”Wait. What?He took a deep breath and then proceeded to shock the shit out of me. “The reason earlier was messy, frantic and without any delicacy whatsoever is because…well, because you weren’t the only virgin on that bed tonight.”
My entire body stilled. “Wh…what?”
“When I look at you, Sophia, all I see is the miracle I never thought I’d ever meet.”
Chapter 12
Michael~
Sophia was shock still in my arms.
I hadn’t planned on telling her this way, but the way she viewed herself upset me enough that I thought she needed to hear the truth about howIsaw her.
I may not have had any bedroom experience with women, but I did have experience with women. I had three sisters who weren’t shy about whatever they were going through, so I observed a lot and learned even more.
And I knew enough to know that it didn’t matter how many times I told Sophia she was beautiful, they were just words. She had tofeelit. She had to feel it from me and the only way I could think to make that happen was tell her the truth about myself.
I’ve only known her for a handful of hours, but she’s the first and only female who’s ever made me lose control. And she’s the only female I’ll ever lose control over. I knew it in my soul.
“Ho…how can that be, Michael?” she whispered in awe.
I didn’t want to bare all my issues after only knowing her a few hours, but her honesty deserved my honestly. I just hope I didn’t scare her off. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to handle that.
I tightened my arms around her torso. “I have…my emotions can be intense sometimes, Sophia,” I started to explain. “They reach peak limits and I’ve always been worried that sex would be the same way. I worried that I might hurt someone if I ever lost control.”
Sophia was quiet for a few agonizing seconds before saying, “Are you bi-polar or something?”
“No,” I answered, but what did I know. “At least, I don’t think I am,” I amended. “I don’t have highs and lows. It’s nothing like that. It’s mostly my temper. It’s…it’s scary when unleashed.” I might as well get it all out there. “Violently so. And I’ve always heard that good sex can make a person lose their minds, I just was…wary.”
“Why me?”
Christ, she was going to think I was crazy. “When I first saw you sitting at your desk, I was already attracted to you physically. When you opened your mouth, with so much candor and not so much tact, I was blown away.”
“Mich-”
