Page 33 of Make Me Yours
I scrambled off the couch and answered on the fourth ring. Not surprisingly, it was Ashlyn.
“I have some crazy big news!” she shrieked. I shifted the phone from my ear, hoping to preserve some of what was left of my hearing.
“So spill it, doll.”
She giggled with excitement. “Oh, it’s too good. I can’t just tell you over the phone. Meet me and Aiden for drinks tonight. This is something we need to celebrate.”
“Okay. Where?” To be honest the distraction of getting out for a drink sounded good, and her giddiness was contagious. I could certainly muster up some energy for my best friend, after all.
We made plans to meet up in thirty minutes at a swanky club downtown. It was the same place we went to celebrate last term when Ashlyn’s thesis proposal was approved, and the place where she first she introduced Aiden to others, rather than keeping him all to herself in her apartment all the time. Of course, that was back when he was still known as Logan.
I peeled off my clothes and stood undressed inside my walk-in closet. I rifled through the hanging blouses and pencil skirts, but nothing seemed right. I settled on a pair of black skinny jeans and a simple black tank top, along with the tallest pair of heels I owned.
I stood in front of the mirror and twisted my hair up into a sleek bun. I hadn’t meant to dress in all black, but I supposed it fit my mood. I added lipstick and blush to wake up my look and grabbed a small leopard-print clutch, then I was on my way.
Several minutes later, I was elbowing my way through a wall-to-wall crowd at Club Aqua cursing Ashlyn’s name and regretting my decision to come out.
I should have just made her tell me her big news on the phone. I was pretty sure it had to do with the fact that her thesis was now finalized. She’d reworked it over the last year and had removed all traces of Aiden’s case from it. She’d come clean to Professor Clancy about their relationship and explained that she no longer felt right about mixing business and pleasure, so to speak. She didn’t ever want her professionalism or judgment called into question, so she spent the last year reworking her whole project. But it’d paid off. I was sure that was what tonight’s celebration was about. She’d already had a few articles published in small journals about amnesia and was really making a name for herself. It was cool to see, but that didn’t mean I needed to be out right now, getting groped and having drinks spilled on my beautiful shoes when all I felt like doing was curling up on the couch.
After passing through a crowd of girls surrounding a bridezilla—complete with a veil and tiara—who was shrieking like a banshee, I finally spotted Ashlyn, waving to me from across the room. Her smile was a welcome sight and I made a beeline straight for her.
Over the past few weeks, we’d talked a few times about the car accident we’d witnessed and Ashlyn couldn’t erase it from her mind any better than I could, so I was glad to see her looking happy and relaxed tonight. I let the tension fall away as she pulled me into her arms for a hug. I patted her back with one arm. I was never much of a hugger.
When I pulled back, Ashlyn thrust her left hand into my face, a large diamond nearly poking out my eye. “We’re engaged!” she shouted above the music.
I fixated on the ring, in utter shock and disbelief. It was a beautiful round-cut diamond, sparkling and elegant, big enough without being flashy, and set in a band studded with tiny diamonds all around it. I sucked in a breath of air despite the crushing weight I felt on my chest, and knowing I was about to burst into tears, I pulled her in for a hug, holding her longer than necessary in order to pull myself together. Ashlyn pulled back out of my arms, mistaking my tears for happy ones. I was supposed to be happy for her, right? So why did I feel like someone had just punched me in the stomach?
“Oh, sweetie! I know, isn’t it great?”
I nodded and wiped at my eyes. “Congratulations, Ashlyn.” I plastered on a smile. “Where’s the lucky guy?” She grabbed my hand and led me through the crowded bar. I couldn’t help but notice the ring felt like a bulky barrier between our hands. That would take some getting used to.
Aiden was standing at the bar, with a glass of amber-colored liquor in his hand, and he was grinning like a damn fool. “Congrats, bud.” I hugged him as well, lifting up on my toes and snaking an arm around his shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” His warm breath brushed past my ear.
He was either more perceptive than I realized, or he was remembering the fact that I didn’t approve of him dating Ashlyn in the beginning. “Yes. She’s happy, and that’s all I care about. And despite busting your balls early on, I know you’re good for her.” I slid up to the bar as they shared another hug. I needed a drink. Preferably something strong.
“Wine? Champagne?” Aiden asked.
I shook my head. “Double vodka soda,” I shouted to the red-haired girl behind the bar.
I took the drink with shaking hands and tossed the thin black straw aside to knock back a healthy sip.
I tried to enjoy the rest of the night, celebrate with my friends who were happy, in love, and newly engaged, but despite the upbeat atmosphere and the bottomless drinks the bartender seemed to be serving, it all felt hollow somehow. The distinct feeling that someone was watching me compounded my discomfort and caused me to scan the sea of bodies mingling behind me. My heart pounded in my chest as my gaze met his.
Cohen.
He was dressed in jeans and a fitted black T-shirt with the wordSecurityprinted across the chest in white block lettering. I wanted to run across the room to him, to fling my arms around his neck and inhale his comforting scent, but I stayed put, balanced on the stool, afraid that if I tried to stand, my legs wouldn’t support my weight.
The house music thumped in time with my heartbeat, and I began to feel lightheaded. Cohen’s eyes traced the length of my body, from my heel-clad feet dangling from the stool, up to my hand circling the glass I was holding. It was as though he could see right through me, to everything underneath, everything I was thinking. Everything I desperately wanted.
I realized I’d been holding my breath, waiting for him to come to me when he pressed the device in his ear, listening to something only he could hear and he set off toward the back of the club. I began breathing again once Cohen disappeared from sight. I glanced at Ashlyn to see if she’d noticed him, but she was happily chatting away with Aiden, obviously oblivious. For a moment I wondered if I’d imagined him, but I was certain I hadn’t. I’d felt his hunger for me from across the room, and my body had visibly responded, breaking out in chill bumps despite the heat of the room.
Later, when I’d followed Ashlyn to the dance floor, I’d begun to think I had imagined the whole Cohen-spotting, as there’d been no trace of him again. Aiden stole Ashlyn away from me but I continued to sway to the music, oblivious to everything but the thumping bass and my own heartbeat.
It felt good to let everything fall away, to feel the music and forget everything else. A warm hand on my shoulder snapped my eyes open. For a second I thought it could be Cohen, but the guy looking back at me couldn’t have been more different from Cohen if he tried. He was sporting a colorful sleeve of tattoos that covered his entire left arm, and a small barbell was pierced through one eyebrow. Mr. Eyebrow Stud smiled, and rested his hands on my waist, following my movements. I placed my hands on his shoulders and let him guide me. He was pressed close, warm and sexy with his bad-boy looks, and I was drunk. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, turning myself over to the moment. His hands skimmed along my hips, holding me close and moving with me. My pulse drummed anxiously in my neck at the thought of Cohen spotting us.
I shimmied against him in time with the music and thought about how effortless it would be to flirt my way into his pants, to get him to come home with me. My brain ran through all of this in a matter of seconds, but I kept my face impassive and aloof. It would be so easy to engage in nameless, faceless, emotionless sex with this guy, but I knew that would only make me feel worse. I knew it wasn’t what I really wanted.He isn’t Cohen, a little voice inside my head pointed out unnecessarily.
