Page 99 of Lucas
“Ahem.” Lucas clears his throat from the doorway, leaning against the frame with his arms crossed.
“Oh, hi. I didn’t notice you were there.” How long has he been listening to us? He’s wearing gray sweatpants that hang low on his hips and a white t-shirt that stretches across his muscular chest.
He runs a hand through his tousled dark hair, his biceps flexing with the movement. A strip of tanned skin is exposed on his flat stomach as his shirt rides up. Images of him naked above me flash through my mind—his chiseled body glistening with sweat, his blue eyes burning into mine. My cheeks heat. My body tingles, desire unfurling in my core.
“Thank you, Ava. Can I have a few minutes to talk to Kaia?”
“Yes, of course.” I give an embarrassed smile, aware that I’m staring, and bolt from the kitchen. I head to my room, my pulse racing.
I pace around the bedroom like a caged animal, my bare feet sinking into the plush carpet. Cartman chirps from hisperch, oblivious to my inner turmoil. “I don’t know what to do, Cartman,” I say, my voice cracking. “Father cut me off, tossed me out of his life like I never existed. And it hurts. It fucking hurts.” I press a hand to my chest.
I told Kaia it would be okay, but I lied. I’m not okay.
I’m so worthless to Father that he didn’t even hesitate. I sacrificed everything to save the company he built and married the enemy because of how much the company meant to him. All so he would love me back, and even that wasn’t enough.
I pace faster, my breathing rapid and shallow.
He pushed me all my life to be tough. Not to cry, not to show mercy. But I’m not tough. I’m just pretending, and meeting Kaia now, seeing her strength, knocked down all my pretenses. I’m not strong like her. Not even close.
And I have no one.
Loneliness crashes over me, as vast and empty as the ocean.
The tears I’ve been holding back break free, streaming down my cheeks. A sob builds in my throat.
Fuck.
Don’t cry. Only babies cry. I scrub my face with trembling hands.
A knock sounds on the bedroom door, and my heart leaps into my throat. To my horror, the door opens.
I spin to face the wall, my back to the door. I wipe the tears away, but fresh ones continue to fall. “Didn’t they teach you to wait for a response?” I snap, trying to hide the wobble in my voice.
“Ava?” Lucas says.
“Get out of here. I didn’t invite you in,” I snarl without turning around.
“Are you crying?” he asks, concern coloring his tone.
“No,” I lie, but my voice betrays me, breaking on the single syllable.
He approaches, his footsteps muffled on the carpet but I can feel the heat of him as he stands behind me, so close, but not quite touching. The clean, masculine scent of him envelopes me. I close my eyes, my lips parting in a ragged breath. My heart drums against my ribs.
“Please look at me,” he pleads.
“No,” I breathe, not trusting myself to say more. Not trusting that I won’t throw myself into his arms and beg him to take the pain away.
“Is it because of Kaia? You’re crying because of her? Does it bother you she’s here?” He sounds puzzled, worry threaded through his words.
“No, it has nothing to do with Kaia. She’s wonderful. And she told me what you did for her.” My voice is steadier now, but still thick with unshed tears.
“I did what anyone would do. She needed help, and I was able to give it.”
“Not everyone would have. Most people would just look the other way.” Father would never take someone like her into his home.
I turn to face Lucas, my eyes still bright with moisture. “What will we do when she sees we’re sleeping separately?” I ask, desperate to change the subject.
“We’ll say you snore,” he says, his expression serious, but humor sparks in the depths of his blue eyes.
