Page 139 of Lucas
“Truth. You asked me what my biggest regret is. My biggest regret is drafting that contract and not telling you the truth the moment I realized I was in love with you.”
She’s silent, her face unreadable.
“You asked me what my greatest fear is,” I go on. “This is it. This is my greatest fear. I’m terrified you won’t forgive me. That you won’t believe I love you and that the last thing I want is to hurt you. I’m scared you’ll leave me because Idon’t want to live in a world where you’re not with me.” My voice cracks, the words scraped raw from my throat.
“I believe you love me,” she says slowly, each word measured. “And I’m glad you’re okay, that you’re recovering, but...”
I bite my lip, dread coiling in my gut. “You’re breaking up with me?”
“No. But I need time to think.” She wraps her arms around herself, a protective gesture that twists like a knife in my chest.
“Please don’t go.” I’m not above begging, not when it comes to her. “I need you.”
“You should have thought about that before you lied to me for months. You made me feel like I did with my father—worthless and stupid. And that’s a feeling I never want to experience again.” She turns to leave, her hand on the door.
“Ava, wait.” I struggle to sit up, ignoring the screaming protest of my battered body. I have to stop her, have to make this right.
But she’s already gone, the door clicking shut behind her with a sound like a gunshot, a death knell.
I slump back against the pillows, all the strength draining out of me. It’s over. I’ve lost her.
Lost everything.
Within a minute, everyone is back in my room, their faces a blur of concern and confusion. All I want is for them to leave, to let me be alone, to cry, to shatter in peace.
But I force a smile, pretending everything is fine. Just like I always do.
Even as my world crumbles to ashes around me.
Even as the only thing that ever mattered slips through my fingers.
My Ava.
My heart.
My everything.
Gone.
Chapter Thirty-Six
LUCAS
“Be careful. You’re not fully recovered,” Cora scolds me as I step outside to the pool area, my arm nestled in its sling. The sun beats down, warm on my skin. “You’re not even supposed to be up and about.”
“I’m also not supposed to lie in bed going crazy for weeks,” I retort, lowering myself onto the lounger beside her. The soft cushion feels heavenly against my battered body. I lean back, mindful of my still-healing ribs, and close my eyes against the blinding glare. “You don’t have to be here, you know? You can go hang out with your boy toy instead of babysitting me.” I wave my good hand, shooing her away.
“I’m on Lucas-watch today,” she says, adjusting her sunglasses.
“I’m not a baby. I don’t need constant supervision. Plus, Hugo is here too. It’s not like I’m going to fall and break another rib while reaching for the remote.”
My siblings have been taking turns watching over me like hawks since I was discharged from the hospital a week ago. Sure, I’m still moving slower than a ninety-year-old turtle, and I’m down an arm, but it’s not like I’m going to let them wash my dick in the shower or wipe my ass. Their constant hovering is unnecessary and more than a little annoying. However, I suspect their vigilance has less to do with my injuries and more to do with a certain green-eyed brunette.
Cora shoots me a knowing look, confirming my suspicions. “Has Ava answered you yet?”
Just as I thought. They’re worried I’ll fall apart because of Ava, not the accident. Well, they’re not far off the mark. Iamfalling apart.
“No,” I admit, the single syllable heavy.
