Page 54 of Tempted By a Highland Beast
They resumed walking, the conversation settling into a more comfortable rhythm. But something had shifted between them, a deeper level of trust and understanding that made Rowena feel less alone with her fears.
“May I tell ye something?” Lilias asked after they’d walked in silence for several minutes.
“Of course.”
Lilias was quiet for a moment, seeming to gather her courage. When she spoke, her voice was small and uncertain in a way that made Rowena’s heart ache.
“I’m scared too,” she admitted. “About what will happen tae me when me faither dies.”
Rowena felt a stab of guilt for being so consumed with her own fears that she’d forgotten Lilias had her own uncertain future to worry about. “What dae ye mean?”
“Fergus was never particularly warm tae me growing up,” Lilias said, her words careful and measured. “I was the child of me faither’s second marriage, and I think he saw me as... unnecessary. A complication he’d have tae deal with eventually.”
“Surely ye don’t think he would have cast ye out?”
Lilias’s laugh was bitter and humorless. “I think he would have sent me tae a nunnery the moment our father died. It would have been the neat, tidy solution—remove the inconvenient half-sister, and eliminate any potential complications around inheritance.”
The casual way she spoke of her own disposal made Rowena’s chest tighten with fury. “That’s monstrous.”
“That’s practical,” Lilias corrected. “And I understood it, even if I didnae like it. Fergus had responsibilities tae the clan, and I was just... extra.”
“Dae ye think Constantine feels the same way?” Rowena asked in horror.
“I dinnae ken what Constantine feels,” Lilias said honestly. “We’ve only just begun tae ken each other, and I’m nae sure he sees me as anything more than another obligation he inherited along with the title. Especially once he has a wife tae consider, children of his own tae plan fer…”
She trailed off, but Rowena could hear the fear in her silence. The terror of being unwanted, displaced, forgotten.
“He’s nae going tae send ye away,” Rowena said firmly.
“How can ye be so certain?”
“Because I’ve seen the way he is with his people,” Rowena replied. “I’ve watched him take responsibility fer things that weren’t his fault and protect people who couldn’t protect themselves. Because sending ye away would be the kind of casual cruelty that goes against everything I’ve learned about who he is.”
Lilias’s eyes were bright with unshed tears. “But what if he daesnae care about me? What if I’m just another burden he’s too honorable tae abandon but too practical tae keep?”
Rowena stopped walking and turned to face the younger woman fully, her expression fierce with protective determination. “Then I’ll make sure he understands that ye’re nae going anywhere. If I become Lady of this castle, Lilias, ye’ll always have a place here. Nae as a burden or an obligation, but as family.”
The promise seemed to hit Lilias like a physical blow. She stared at Rowena with wide, wondering eyes, as if she couldn’t quite believe what she’d heard.
“Ye’d dae that fer me?”
“Of course I would,” Rowena said simply. “Ye’ve become dear tae me, Lilias. More than dear. Ye’ve become the sister I never had, and I protect what’s mine.”
Tears spilled over Lilias’s lashes, tracking silver paths down her cheeks. “I’ve never had anyone say that tae me before,” she whispered. “That I was wanted. That I belonged somewhere.”
Rowena pulled the girl into a fierce embrace, holding her close as she wept. “Well, ye have it now,” she said firmly. “Whatever else happens, whatever challenges we face, ye have a family. Ye have me.”
They stood like that for several minutes, holding each other in the cold morning air, two women who’d found in each other the acceptance and belonging they’d both been searching for. When Lilias finally pulled back, her eyes were red but bright with something that looked remarkably like hope.
“Thank ye,” she whispered.
“Thank ye,” Rowena replied. “Fer helping me see that maybe caring about someone daesnae have tae mean losing meself. That maybe finding the right people tae care about is what makes ye more yerself, nae less.”
Lilias smiled through her tears. “Daes that mean ye’re going tae stop being afraid of marrying Constantine?”
“I’m going tae try,” Rowena said honestly. “I’m going tae try tae focus on what I might gain instead of what I might lose. And I’m going tae trust that he’s the kind of man who’ll catch me if I fall.”
“He is,” Lilias said with quiet certainty. “He’s exactly that kind of man.”
