Page 13 of No Mistakes
“Tell me to stop, and I will.”
I don’t say anything. Ican’tsay anything because frankly, I don’t want him to stop. And the smirk that curls on his lips says he knows it.
CHAPTER 7
EVA
I slamthe door to the bathroom, locking it behind me. The echo bounces off the sterile tiles wrapped around the room.
My breathing comes out fast, too fast, and I press my palms against the cool porcelain sink, grounding myself. The image of Axel walking into the living room replays over and over, and I grip the edge of the sink harder, making my knuckles turn white. I stare at the reflection in front of me and examine the person standing before me. The flushed cheeks, trembling jaw, and eyes wide but with a hint of darkness. The colour that only relates to pain and heartbreak. I don’t recognise the person who is looking back at me. She looks like someone who lost a war and came back pretending it didn’t happen.
I lift a finger, slowly brushing it against the new scar just under my collarbone, half hidden by my shirt. A reminder of everything I’ve survived. Of everything he dragged into my life.
I squeeze my eyes shut as the video plays inside my mind of Marco and his men standing over me as I'm pushed onto the floor, begging for my life. I shake my head, begging the memory to disappear, and when it does, I sigh in relief. Only for it to be replaced seconds later by someone else with a stupid, cocky smirk.
Rage fuels my body at the way he dared to stand there in the middle of the range like he hadn’t torn me apart. Like he wasn’t a walking fucking betrayal. He stood there and breathed like nothing had changed, while my entire world had been reduced to ash the second I thought he died.
And then, worse… worse than the lies, worse than the rage was the way my body betrayed me. The way my heart stuttered just from seeing him. The heat in my chest that surged the moment I realised he was real, alive, right there.
The pounding in my head returns, a dull drumbeat behind my eyes as I blink the tears away. There’s only one person I want to call right now, and she’s no longer here. The person who would hold me tight at night when my heart was broken, or when I hurt myself when I first rode my bike without training wheels.
My mother's voice plays in my head, bringing me some kind of comfort as I imagine us lying in my bed, wrapped in each other's arms. “It’s okay, baby girl, mummy’s here.”
I wipe the tears away with the back of my hand, cursing out loud for crying when I promised myself I would be strong.
My mother was the peacemaker in the family. The one you would go to for issues or support. She would sit with you for hours on end, until you were ready to talk about what had happened, and end the conversation with a warm cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. A small laugh escapes me as I picture her handing me my pink cup as the whipped cream drips down the side. “A warm drink to hug you from the inside.” She would say.
“Oh mum… God, I miss you so fucking much.” I whisper. “I could do with someone right now.”
Just as I finish my sentence, a knock appears at the door. I freeze for a moment, a part of me thinking it could be her, butI know deep down, there is only one way I will be reunited with her, and today is not that day.
“Eva?”
I look towards the door, pausing as I hear Mandy’s voice float through the cracks, and I look up to the ceiling, smiling slightly. “Is this your way of telling me to forgive her?” I say softly.
“Eva, are you in there?” Mandy asks, her voice soft.
Sighing, I turn and lean against the sink. “I need a minute.” I manage to say.
Mandy pauses, as if she’s trying to decide what to do. “I’ll be outside.”
I listen to the faint sound of retreating footsteps as she walks away from the door, and for a long time, I don’t move.
Pushing myself away from the sink, I turn and press the tap down to splash water. The coldness hits me instantly, bringing me back to reality. The mirror catches the rise and fall of my shoulders, and I force myself to stand straighter. I’m no longer the girl he left behind. I am my mother's daughter.
I press my lips together and make a promise to myself, “You don’t get to break me twice.”
I step outside to a different atmosphere. The clouds above are dense, threatening a downpour that feels symbolic, like even the sky knows something’s brewing.
I spot Mandy leaning against the hood of the car, her arms crossed and eyes narrowed at something next to the building. I don’t look as I walk towards her, and she straightens the moment she sees me.
“You good?” She asks, but I know the question is heavier than it sounds. I nod, brushing past her towards the passengerdoor. “Let’s just get out of here. I fancy a hot chocolate with whipped cream.”
She gives me a small smile at the mention of this. She knows all about my family and our history. When I first moved here, we would have hot chocolate every night for a month until one day… we just didn’t.
She jerks her chin across the parking lot. “He didn’t follow you over here.”
I glance over, catching Axel standing near the edge of the range, talking to Ant, his expression unreadable from this distance. For a split second, his eyes flick towards me, and I swear, a clash of lightning flashes across the sky as the air thickens.
