Page 36 of Tangled Hearts
He looked so damn cozy all curled up in my lap, so I didn’t want to disturb him, even though I probably should have. And when he woke up, all adorably grumpy and defensive? It had my entire heart thrumming. There’s something about Eli that makes me feel oddly protective. Like I want to wrap him up in a blanket and keep him safe from things that might harm him.
Which brings me to the dishes. It’s clear I need to be more aware of messes I may leave behind. I’ve never considered myself messy and have always kept a tidy home, but like I told Eli, if washing dishes immediately after use is what he needs to feel at peace in his own home, then easy. Done.
After I finish with the dishes, I straighten up the already clean kitchen. I’m sweeping when Eli clears his throat. When I turn around,my breath leaves me in a quick rush. I know I told him to get all dolled up, but I wasn’t expecting… this.
Against my will, my eyes peruse him from head to toe. His makeup is soft and understated, his hair swept back and artfully messy. He’s wearing the same shirt he was the night I met him. I try hard to bring my eyes back to an appropriate place, but the black skirt exposing miles of pale, hairless legs makes it practically impossible to look anywhere else. I swallow hard against the dryness in my throat, and when he takes a step forward, I dart my eyes back to his face.
His gaze is locked on the floor in front of him, his cheeks a little pink. “If it’s too much, I can change.” The tremor in his voice has my heart clenching. “I know it’s a lot. I don’t want to embarrass you.”
The words tell me all I need to know. Someone, somewhere, made Eli feel bad about himself and his choice of clothing. Not me. Not today. I step in front of him and tilt his chin up again. So much for not touching him. Hesitant green eyes settle on mine. “There’s nothing wrong with what you’re wearing, alright?” I say firmly. He nods, his eyes going soft. My heart thuds. Not good. Not good at all. “God, you really do look like a little doll.”
He looks a bit like a deer in the headlights, and, honestly? Who can blame him because whatishappening with my brain-to-mouth filter? And I’m still holding his chin. Jesus. I drop my hand and step back, surprised when he sways toward me. He catches himself, swallowing hard. “Do you want to go change your clothes?” Eli asks.
“Yeah, I probably should, huh?” I look down at what I’m wearing. No way in hell I’m going out in public looking like this while he looks likethat.
Eli shrugs, cheeks still pink. “I think you look fine.”
I can’t help but smile. “Not compared to you. I’ll be quick, okay?”
After getting our boba—and I’ll die before I admit it, but it’s growing on me—Eli and I step into the parking lot. I’m not sure why he didn’t want to stay inside to drink it and hang out with Mia, but hey, I’m down for whatever he wants to do.
“So, uh—” he starts, before cutting off abruptly.
“Yeah?” I prompt, slowing down a little.
Eli takes a breath, like he’s trying to calm himself down, and then he squares his shoulders. “Do you want to come to The Hart Foundation with me today? I know you’ve already met my dad, but I thought it might be cool to just hang out.”
My stomach flips in nervous anticipation, and my words get caught in my throat. Eli doesn’t seem to notice my internal struggle, or maybe he does and he thinks it’s somehow about him because his defenses kick in before I’ve managed to get my shit together. “You don’t have to,” he snaps, staring daggers at me with his stunning eyes.
I must be losing my absolute fucking mind—there’s no other reason I’d step toward him, curl my fingers under his chin, and force his gaze to mine otherwise. This is becoming a pattern. Not a good one. I can’t seem to stop, though.
The scent of strawberries fills my nose, and for a few tense seconds, we just stare at each other. His breathing is ragged, his eyes wide. And then something… shifts. He softens, his body going lax, his eyelashes fluttering as all the fight leaves his gaze, and he blinks up at me expectantly.
Let go of him.
Let him goright now.
My hand doesn’t listen to my brain at all.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” I ask, my voice a croaky, fucked-up whisper that doesn’t sound like my own at all.
Eli blinks slowly, almost like he’s in a daze. His tongue wets his lower lip. “Why areyoulooking atmelike that?” he counters.
My stomach tightens, heat swirling through me as my cock thickens behind my zipper. Oh fuck. Oh fuck oh fuck.
I drop Eli’s chin like he burned me and step back. It breaks the moment and Eli’s daze. I should tell him no. I can’t do this. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me right now. But Ijustfucking promised him companionship, and I will not be a person who lies to him. “I’d be happy to go with you.”
Eli nods slowly, his expression a little confused. “Okay. I’ll just—I need to let Dad know?” It comes out like a question, and I’m not really sure why.
I have no idea what I’m doing, but it’s bad. The whole thing is bad.
All I know for sure is I have a twenty-minute drive to get my shit together before I have to be around Roman. And this? Whateverthisis? I have to get it under control.
When we walk in the front door of The Hart Foundation, I force a deep breath into my lungs. Eli and I made casual small talk on the way over here, but he was a little more quiet than usual. I have no idea what I need to do to get my equilibrium back around him, but I need to do it quickly before this blows up in my face.
I can’t be attracted to him. I just fucking can’t. So I need to do whatever I can to keep my distance while alsonotkeeping my distancebecause I literally just told him not even two hours ago that I’d offer him companionship.
I can do that without involving my dick. And I can definitely do it without involving my heart.
