Page 98 of We Thought We Were Invincible
Jamie hesitated, weighing his next actions. After a tense moment, he pulled off his shirt, laying it on the sand. “Come here.” He held his hand out to me, and I took it as he pulled me down.
I ran my hands up his chest like I'd done a million times before, before tugging off my shirt and kissing him like it was the last time. Because it was.
When my hands fumbled with the button on his jeans, he stopped me.
“Hey.” His voice calmed me with a single word. “Slow is good.”
He dropped small kisses on my stomach, making his way up toward my neck in an agonizingly slow assault. I moaned as his tongue made circles on my burning skin.
“Too slow,” I panted, pushing him up so I could shimmy out of my pants. His chuckle was cut off as he stared at me, pupils dilating.
“You're beautiful.” His fingertips grazed my bare skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. “Are you sure about this?”
“Jamie, we can't give each other anything else. But we can give this moment. We can give goodbye.” My voice thickened on the last word and he pulled me down again, cutting off any tears that might have come.
Jamie made love to me under the stars with the ocean roaring in the background. It was perfect. And it was the end.
When we were done, I lay with my head on his chest, listening to the steady pounding of his heart. Tears dripped down my face onto his skin.
“I'm sorry.” I sat up and turned away from him. “I don't mean to cry.”
His hand rubbed my back as he sat up behind me. “California, look at me.”
I did as he asked, wiping at my face as I turned. “Don't try to make me feel better, Jamie. I don't want to be okay. I don't want to get over you.”
He cupped my cheek. “I love you.” His back shook, and it was only then that I realized he was crying too.
“I'm scared.”
“Your dad is going to love you.”
“Not about that.” I sucked in a shaky breath. “You're joining the army. What if…” A sob escaped me. “What if something happens to you?”
“I'll be okay.”
“You don't know that.” I paused to calm myself. “Can you make me a promise?”
“Anything.”
“No matter what's going on in our lives, I need to know that you're okay. Promise me that you'll always stay in touch.”
He wiped the tears from his face. “Is that all our future holds? Staying in touch?”
I reached for my clothes and pulled them on. “I hope the army helps you find what you're looking for, Jamie. I really do.”
I got to my feet, brushing sand from my clothes. Looking down at him one more time, I shook my head and walked back to meet Colby to head home.
In one simple act, the boy I loved with everything I had became a part of my past, disappearing from both my present and future.
38
Jamie
I stuffed the final shirt into my bag and shoved it off my bed. It landed on the floor with a definitive thud. Eight hours and forty-seven minutes. That was how long it'd been since I'd said goodbye to Callie and to Colby, the only true family I'd ever known.
I sat on the edge of my bed and leaned forward to rest my elbows on my knees. My breaths came in heavy rasps.I can do this.Despite what I told everyone, I was scared shitless. Only two hours to go before I was on my own. But I'd never really be on my own. Amelia's brother told me I had the army now. They would be my family.
It was hard to see that when it hurt so much. Leaving Gulf city was easy. Getting free of my father and even leaving my brother were simple things.
