Page 30 of Feral: Part Two
Both Arlo and Beck agree, with the same grim determination in their eyes that I feel building in my own chest.
I'm about to say something to my pack about everything we've just learned when Slate's stomach rumbles loudly. He turns beet red with embarrassment, which only makes Preston start laughing. But then Preston's stomach rumbles as well, equally loud and demanding.
"I guess it's time for us to eat too, then," I say, grateful for the mundane interruption.
Slate
A week passes with something that could almost be called routine, though the word feels foreign. I find myself sleeping next to or around Kael and Thane most nights, becoming more comfortable but still wary as fuck. Waiting for the moment the other shoe drops and I’m cast out to fend for myself all over again.
Every night starts the same way—me curled at the very edge of the den, ready to bolt at the first sign of threat. But somewhere in the dark hours before dawn, I find myself gravitating toward their warmth. Sometimes I wake to find myself pressed against one of their backs with Preston on the other side, stealing heat and comfort I'm not sure I deserve.
The strange thing is how my body has started to relax incrementally each night. Muscles that have been clenched formonths finally begin to uncoil. The part of me that’s constantly on alert that's kept me alive for so long has started to fade into something manageable instead of overwhelming. I still catalog little corners to hide out in or hold my breath when Kael raises his voice, but the urgency behind putting up my walls has dulled.
Kael said that this could be the pack for me, the pack that would give me the comfort and love and acceptance that I needed. And I started to believe it.
Until Preston got sick.
It was nothing serious. Just a cold or maybe pregnancy-related fatigue that left him more tired than usual. But watching the pack's response put me right back on the edge with my usual response of shutting down and hiding away. It was like everyone’s focus shifted to Preston, which initially I was more than happy about, but all the sweet little touches, the intense looks across the room… all that kind of stopped.
It felt like I became theotherOmega.
But I endured until Preston stopped reaching for me, too.He’s just sick, I tell myself.
A curse flies from my mouth as I drag a blanket off the bed in Kael’s room and stuff it in the closet, the chaos in my mind fighting against my reality. The rest of my pack is in our den, catering to Preston again, although I’m pretty sure Kael left to grab something from the market. Or to speak with Arlo and Beck. They’ve been meeting up more regularly, trying to understand the clusterfuck we’ve all been thrust into.
Which is fine.
I’m fine.
I grab another blanket from his bed before raising it to my nose, his natural musk settling the discomfort swirling around in my gut. I hate how much I want more, more of them, more of this place, more of this future. My mind is working againstme, telling me once again that I don’t matter. I’m my own worst enemy.
The rational part of my brain knows this makes sense. Preston has been their Omega for years. He's carrying their children. Of course, they're protective of him when he's not feeling well. But the irrational part—the part that's been rejected six times, that's learned not to expect care or concern—whispers that this is exactly how it starts. First, I’m an afterthought when someone else needs attention. Then I’m a burden. Then I’m discarded.
It's one reason I have a den in almost every room. All the corners are mine. Thane and Malik think it’s hilarious, Preston is worried, and Kael keeps finding me.
Regardless of where I hide, an hour later, the Alpha is crouching in front of me with that understanding smile before just sitting beside me. He doesn’t talk or ask any questions. He’s just…there, a comfort I crave but don’t dare ask for because then he’s gone just as fast, catering to Preston.
Another curse falls from my lips as I stuff a pillow into my newest den and then plop onto the pile of cotton. I groan, rubbing my overextended stomach, the babies inside lightly kicking where I touch my skin. That only started happening last night and as endearing as it is, I just want to sleep. To rest. To wake up and everything go back to how it was a week ago.
“What are you doing in here?”
I stare up at my Omega, his hands on his hips as he glares down at me. I’ve never seen him so disappointed despite the permanent flush that has somehow taken over his body. He dips his hands to his belly, his jaw tightening as he blows out a heavy breath. He’s more clothed than I’ve ever seen him, Preston a little more pregnant than the last time I lay beside him.
“Sweetie, why are you in here?” Preston tilts his head to the side as he steps back a few feet, letting me stand up fully. “You haven’t been in the den recently.”
“You were sick,” I mumble.
He throws me a small smile as he leads me to the bed I just stripped. There’s a heap of clothing that wasn’t there a minute ago, confusion growing in my expression. Preston pats the bare mattress as if gesturing for me to look through it. “Yes, but that didn’t mean you had to make yourself scarce. I’ve barely seen you in two days.”
I weather the look I want to give him and just stare a little closer at the fabric, even more confused when I realize most of it is lace. “It’s fine. I was just restless.”
“Sweetie…”
I hate when he pulls that voice because I don’t want to hurt him. He’s the first person who truly opened up to me. I don’t really understand love, but if I had to explain it, Preston would be my first real love. He’s everything to me. Which is why I don’t want to explain anything to him. I plaster on a fake smile and look up at him, but he automatically sees through that. “Fuck, I just… I’m feeling a little left out.”
Preston’s brows arch and then he sighs, falling back into the chair beside the bed. He lets out a little squeak of relief, the weariness in his eyes and his sweetened scent telling me he might give birth this week if we’re not careful. “Slate, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even think about it that way. I wasn’t even really thinking and I know the others just wanted to take care of me. You seem to really like the pool house, so I’m sure they just assumed…”
“That’s the problem, though, Preston. Rationally, I know they were just taking care of you that you didn’t want me anywhere near you because you were sick and we’re both pregnant. I get that, but fuck my head’s all messed up and I just…” Tears gather in my eyes as I smack them away before they can fall. “Kael said that this could be real and then it just… and you…” I clamp my mouth shut, refusing to fall apart in front of Preston.
