Page 31 of Doubts of the Egoist
His mind slipped into the depraved zone of unbridled instinct. His blood almost boiled in his oxygen-starved veins. Angry, passionate, and aggressive, Kuon was everything Yugo remembered him to be, everything he’d missed.
He looked up, froze, staring into the boiling abyss of Kuon’s dark eyes. Conflicting emotions swirled and collided within, forming a soul-destroying maelstrom.
When Yugo was sure he’d be headbutted, Kuon opened his mouth, curved his spine, and drove his teeth into Yugo’sbottom lip. Something rubbed against Yugo’s solar plexus, hot and hard.
Pain spiked and blood filled his mouth as Yugo clamped a hand on Kuon’s ass to hold their bodies flush. With his other hand, Yugo freed his cock from the cage of his wet pants and pressed the itching tip to Kuon’s taint. An electric impulse zapped through his body, but it was Kuon who moaned.
Yugo’s cockhead found his anus and rubbed against it, increasing the pressure with each upward movement, stretching the tender skin but not yet breaching the muscle ring. Just rubbing against Kuon, driving him into the excruciating madness of unquenched desire, felt insanely euphoric.
Kuon shuddered. His spine snapped forward, forehead resting in the crook of Yugo’s neck. A quiet, indecipherable whisper dissolved into the steam. When he opened his mouth to ask Kuon to repeat, pain bolted through his neck as sharp teeth sank into the skin between his ear and the improvised collar. When Kuon sucked hard, an idiotic smile tickled Yugo’s lips. The assaulted spot throbbed with hot, nagging pain promising a juicy hematoma.
Yugo had always hated ownership marks on his body. Besides, his lovers rarely stayed long enough for them to have a reason to leave one. Those who did knew better. Possessive demands exhausted him too quickly, reminding him of Mio. But the mark he had surely received tonight made him feel as if he had finally got a confession.
“I want you.” Yugo’s fingers drifted up his shaft to where his cockhead kissed Kuon’s hole. One finger slipped in with little resistance. “Good. You are still soft.”
“Shut up…” Kuon’s short nails raked along his spine,tearing off his shirt as Yugo warmed up his entrance with slow, massaging movements. Two fingers slipped in, scissoring, opening the sphincter. With a hiss, Kuon looked over his shoulder. His inner muscles clenched against the intrusion as some water got inside. “No, wait…”
“Kuon,” Yugo called, making the younger man face him again. Dark brown eyes owlishly gazed at him with a mix of lust and something akin to fear. Yugo smiled at his distress. “No one is watching. Only me. I promise.”
“But… the water. It’s getting in.”
“Let it.”
A second became two, then three, before Kuon relaxed, hiding from embarrassment in the darkness of his lowered lashes and the kiss. His body softened, allowing Yugo’s fingers and water to enter him. A brush of a fingerpad against the prostate caused a soft moan to tickle Yugo’s tongue, making his chest ache with the need to crush this powerful body in an embrace. Unable to hold back any longer, he let go of Kuon’s buttock and guided his cock to where his fingers were wedged deep inside.
Kuon arched back, eyes wide, mouth agape. His breath died in his throat with a low hiss, and it took him a moment to blink through the intense sensation. “Wait… No…”
“Breathe in. I’ll pull out.” Clinging to the last thread of self-control, Yugo held back the friction and slowly withdrew his fingers. His cock still pulsing inside the ring of painfully clenching muscles, Yugo remained very still, dying with each passing second of immobility as Kuon gasped through what looked like a panic attack or pain.
Air exploded from Kuon’s lungs, and Yugo hissed,squeezed by a muscle cramp.
“Relax, or you’ll tear it off.” To help his lover with the pain, Yugo pulled Kuon’s boxers lower and wrapped his fingers around his cock, protruding from the water.
Kuon shuddered with a groan as Yugo gave it a gentle tug. Kuon’s cock pulsed, and hot, sticky ribbons shot into Yugo’s palm. When the dark-haired head lowered and brown eyes fixed on him blurrily, Yugo gawked at his messy hand and the ribbons of creamy cum coating his chest.
“Did you cum because I put it in?” Yugo asked, smearing the sticky mess between his fingers. Unable to believe his eyes, he brought his hand to his mouth and licked his thumb. “Sweet. By the way, you are still hard.”
“Shut up and move already,” Kuon growled, but instead of waiting for Yugo to comply, he rocked his hips. His head rolled back, and he sank his canine tooth into his lower lip, spine moving in sensual waves.
Self-control snapped. Yugo sucked a hickey on that alluring throat while wrapping his hand around Kuon’s length again. Under the sweet music of Kuon’s muffled moans and the dirty sounds of his hand moving up and down Kuon’s cock, his own orgasm built, swelling in his balls with every friction. The heat and pleasure erased reality as Kuon’s gasps grew shorter, harsher. His cock pulsed, and the painful pleasure jolted through Yugo, forcing his teeth into Kuon’s shoulder, adding yet another mark to the tormented skin.
A low growl escaped Kuon’s throat. His spine snapped forward as he accidentally headbutted Yugo’s temple, body shaking with uncontrollable pleasure. Bright spots popped across his chest, blending with bite marks and hickeys asKuon collapsed onto Yugo, panting through a slack mouth. The aftershocks rolled beneath his skin, muscles spasming. Kuon nestled his forehead into the crook of Yugo’s neck, exhaling a satisfied sigh that cooled the hot spot beneath Yugo’s ear.
CHAPTER 10
Lying on hisbelly, one arm stretched across the smooth sheet, the other draped over Yugo’s thigh, Kuon watched the long fingers twizzle the unlit cigarette. The sweet aroma of raw vanilla tobacco drifted through the air, lulling him into a doped state where it was easier to stare than to think.
In the distant, yellow light that struggled to cross the room and reach the bed, Yugo’s elongated, well-trimmed fingers appeared a bit blurred, but even Kuon’s imperfect vision couldn’t diminish their beauty. He wouldn’t admit it for the world, but he’d enjoyed licking Yugo’s hands just as much as admiring them now. Strong yet slender, with a bluish network of veins tracing the backs, they looked like they had been stolen from an ancient marble statue. His knuckles bore strong calluses earned from martial training. Tough yet unbroken, unblemished by injury, they were still balanced by a hint of Yugo’s innate, dark elegance.
Such fingers seemed better suited for a sculptor or musician and should have no business belonging to a mobster, but then again, neither should the former detective. Yet, here he was, lying on black sheets, watching the oval stone on Yugo’s little finger glint. It trapped both the light and Kuon’s gaze.
With his other hand, Yugo stroked Kuon’s hair, twirling the short strands between his fingers. He looked content, calm, and refreshed, unlike the victim of his passion.
Not a single ounce of energy remained in Kuon’s body. Water, sex, and the long struggle with dinner left him utterly drained. He was glad that food had been served after they left thebathroom; otherwise, shame would have added to his already mixed feelings.
In his inert state, only his gaze retained its ability to move. It kept stubbornly drifting toward the false wall that concealed the Black Duke’s secrets. Whenever he caught himself staring at the wall lamp, he forced his eyes away, fearing Yugo might see through his intentions.
Despite his exhaustion, sleep refused to claim Kuon. He blinked with heavy eyelids as his palm crumpled the fresh sheets, searching for coolness. The familiar sensation, closely associated with Yugo’s bedroom, sparked a chain reaction in his mind. All the questions he wanted to ask, but hadn’t—because of Yugo’s stupid game—flooded his thoughts. Tobias, Mio, the box, the surveillance room, their future together, and his place in Yugo’s life. Many questions gnawed at him, though he didn’t want to hear every answer. But one thing remained essential. “Where is Mio now?”
