Page 92 of Doubts of the Egoist
He closed his eyes, then opened them again. His emotions grew distant as the realization sank in that Kuon hadn’t gone to the dog for spontaneous revenge sex. It was planned.Wanted.
In Yugo’s crime code, planning a crime was as bad as committing it.
His jaw clenched. He wanted to paint Kuon’s world in bloody hues, then let him wash away his mistakes with tears and sweat. The itch to re-apply the masterful beadwork of sweat and blood onto the lacy canvas of his scarred back with a whip burned his fingertips. But the mere thought of those deep, brown eyes, once again obscured by opaque white, robbed him of that option. Instead, he used his words to color Kuon’s world in all shades of humiliation. “Did you like it, having sex with that fucking dog?”
Yugo wasn’t gentle or considerate as he thrust two fingers of his other hand into Kuon’s rectum and spread them apart, stretching the hole wide open.
“Enough!” Kuon hissed, metal clanking. The sour scent of fear thickened in the air as the captive tried to tuck his ass down and wriggle away from the merciless fingers. “It’s not like that. Please, stop!”
Ogling the rosy insides quivering under his gaze, the Black Duke didn’t hear the plea. His fingers moved in and out,caressing the incredible softness as he watched the light play over the glistening inner tissue.
Amazing… How could such a tender place exist in such a strong, rough body?
Yugo’s heart thundered, sending lustful heat simmering through his marrow. He swallowed hard, battling the overwhelming urge to run his tongue over that softness. He would have done so if not for the haunting thought that he was no longer the only one who knew the taste of this place.
“Well, at least he didn’t tear you. No signs of abrasions.” He must have said it with arctic impartiality because Kuon didn’t reply, only his trapped hand inched up his spine as he rested his forehead on the mattress.
The palpable desperation thickening the air didn’t touch Yugo’s heart because his attention was glued to the pulsing anus. He hummed, wondering if he’d consumed enough alcohol for his saliva to acquire disinfectant properties strong enough to remove the dog’s presence. Whiskey would do a better job, but the bottle lay somewhere on the floor, unreachable. He opened his mouth and let a crystal-clear thread of saliva stretch from the tip of his tongue into the flushed insides. It hit the inner wall and slid deeper, swallowed by a powerful contraction of Kuon’s rectum.
Yugo’s stomach twisted with a primal instinct, cock throbbing in his pants. He let out another mouthful of saliva, then pulled at the muscle ring to get a closer look at how his spittle wet the glistening tenderness.
So fucking hot…
Kuon hissed. A powerful spasm forced Yugo’s fingers together, shutting off the mesmerizing view. The Black Duketsked and carefully freed one hand.
“So irresponsible. If that was my cock, it’d be blue and bruised. Nonfunctional. You wouldn’t want that, would you? How else would I please your lewd body? Relax.”
“Yugo, please… I understand you are mad at me,” Kuon tried again, speaking in a dull, defeated voice, “but you have to stop. Violence won’t solve anything.”
The creased, tender opening reddened and swelled, contracting around Yugo’s fingers, negating the protest.
A ringing, deeply satisfying slap rolled through the room, making Kuon jump. A handprint bled through the pale skin of his creamy buttock, making Yugo part his lips in admiration. “Open up!”
Now that he couldn’t see the hickeys, he thought he might almost be gentle. Squeezing Kuon’s butt cheek with one hand, Yugo screwed the fingers of the other one deeper. The sucking sensation around his knuckles tugged at the strings of his nerves, and every sweet contraction resonated in his balls. Even his fingers seemed to become his erogenous zone. His cock leaked, straining against the rough linen fabric, staining it with the sticky pre-cum. At this rate, he’d come in his pants without touching himself.
Yugo wanted to laugh, because at his age, having been with countless men, he shouldn’t react like this to anyone, and yet… No one had ever turned him on so much. No one had ever messed with his head so badly. He wanted to kill Kuon, to destroy this addiction, but at the same time, to lock him up and hide him from everyone, everything, like a treasure.
His inner demons demanded he possess him, to make Kuon invalid without him. They also demanded he kill the dogbecause no one had the right to touch his property and live. And Kuon was his. Always had been, always would be, simply because he didn’t have a choice. He should learn this lesson.
Another surge of jealousy made Yugo stretch Kuon’s rectal passage up and down, ramming his finger pads against the tender knot of the prostate. “Did he touch here? You enjoyed it?”
The captive didn’t answer.
Angered by the silent defiance, Yugo increased the speed and amplitude. The anus softened under the relentless attention of his fingers, moving in slow waves. Up and down, up and down again, each thrust faster, rougher than the last.
A faint groan broke through the tight slit of Kuon’s lips. “Hurts…”
“Hurts?” Hooking his fingers inside the hot rectum to hold his prey in place, Yugo snaked his other hand under Kuon’s hips. Tepid slick coated his palm as he cupped the pulsing length. “Liar, you leak like a bitch in heat. Or are you in pain because my fingers are not enough? With a body this lascivious, no wonder you spread your legs for the dog.”
“Yugo, I—”
“Shut up.” He didn’t want to talk; he wanted to forget, to dissolve into heavy thrusts of hips against round buttocks. After more than a week apart, he responded to everything—the smell, the touch, the hushed groans. He could taste Kuon’s intoxicating sweat in the air as his lips burned with the need to lick the shimmering drops that had collected between his shoulder blades. If only he could put aside his wounded pride and inability to forgive Kuon’s infidelity, he would do so. Maybe, for a split second of carnal pleasure he would be able to let go of the desperation rotting in his chest.
Yugo wanted to laugh at his double standards. He’d often hired rent boys to satisfy his physical needs. Some of his ex-lovers had been involved with other people with his consent. He didn’t mind as long as they only bottomed for him. He never cared how many people fucked them before him or how many would touch them after. They were instruments of pleasure, nothing more. But he couldn’t bring himself to touch Kuon, whose body only knew two men.
Or even less?
He considered Kuon’s words again, finding them more and more truthful. The way Kuon reacted to his touch tipped the scales of Yugo’s judgment toward the belief that no intercourse had taken place. Still, Kuon prepared himself for sex and let the dog mark him. This was unforgivable, and Yugo knew the perfect way to inflict the most painful punishment without harming this scarred body.
