Page 19 of Obsession of the Egoist
“Huh… Is that what you think? Thank you, Gray. I won’t bother you anymore. I’m leaving.”
“No, you are not.”
“Liability…” Kuon shook his head, feeling bitter. “I never asked for your help. You were the one who showed up out of the blue. I don’t need anything from you!”
“I’m your family. You are my responsibility.”
“Responsibility? Youand Helen… You never treated me like an adult. Always so overprotective and condescending. Back then, you turned yourself inside out to stop me from entering the police. Do you think I forgot? If not for yourdad, I would never have made it!”
“Yeah? Maybe we were right, after all. Cheating on psychological tests didn’t make you a good soldier, just like it didn’t make you a good cop. Look where it brought you.”
“I’m a good co… I was a good cop.” Kuon swallowed the insult, but pre-fight tension settled in his shoulders and neck. “And I was a good soldier.”
“Were you?” Something in the way Gray asked, made Kuon frown.
“Why do you say that?” he asked, teeth screeching with pressure. “I served my country well, and I saved lives. I put away a serial killer.”
“You were lucky.”
“Lucky?” Nails bit into his palms, Kuon huffed. “If you call luck a search for evidence, then police all over the world functions on pure luck. I found a witness when everyone else gave up. Yeah, maybe I didn’t follow protocol, but he was arrested. I spent days and nights working that case and it paid off. I can’t believe you called it luck. Take it back.”
“I won’t. With your psychological profile, you wouldn’t even be on the force if Dad didn’t train you to trick psychologists.”
“It doesn’t matter how I got accepted. I was a good cop with a greater record of arrests than many. You know what? Instead of Yugo’s people, I should have concentrated on yours.”
Gray laughed. “Don’t be naïve, Kuon.”
“What does that mean?”
“Nothing.”
“I asked you a question, Gray!”
“You want to know? Fine. All those cargos the police seized were just crumbs from Yugo’s table that he fed you. He used you!”
“Bullshit.”
“We all do this. We call it ‘taxes’. From time to time, we gotta let the police show results. So we occasionally give them a sacrificial goat along with a decent amount of goods. While we do that, the government lets us work. Everyone’s happy.”
“That can’t be…” Kuon desisted in confusion.
“Yes, it can. If the government wanted Yugo or me arrested, we would be rotting in jail. Open your eyes. He used you. That cargo you seized, do you know how you got it? Do you think you did a great job? You were led to it. Yugo played you. He let you seize it. Except miscommunication happened, and instead of the ‘taxes’ you got the real goods.”
“You lie…” The soft place under Kuon’s tongue chilled, paralyzing his speech function, so he mouthed, “I don’t believe you.”
“It doesn’t matter what you believe. It’s true.”
Gray’s words unsettled and stirred every emotion he possessed. Everything he knew fragmented into small pieces as the information ricocheted against his skull, demolishing and rebuilding his past.Was I played?
He needed to think, but Gray’s words hurt his mind and pride.
I can’t believe this…The more he thought about it, the more he felt like falling into a deep rabbit hole, where everything was inside out.If what Gray said is true, there was no reason for Yugo to kidnap me. If I was a part of the plan, why did he punish me? This doesn’t make sense… And Rudolph…
He remembered the talk he eavesdropped with great detail.‘Please, hand him over to me. With his body, he will be admired. And when he is worn out, I’ll make sure he is gotten rid of quietly. You will not have any trouble’.How persuasive Rudolph had been. Back then, Kuon believed him.And here I wondered why he is so concerned about me. He just wanted Gray’s money… And Yugo… He just wanted a toy to play with and break.
“Out…” he said.
“Kuon…” Gray’s voice changed again, and Kuon wondered what kind of expression he wore right now because he heard fear in it.
