Page 17 of Love of the Egoist
Kuon closed his eyes, his lashes trembling, revealing thin crescents of his bloody whites.
What’s this? Another game?Stricken, Yugo couldn’t shake off the weak hand.
Sweat droplets glazing Kuon’s body allured for a touch. Catching flickers of the sunlight trespassing the room, they flared with golden and red on his abdomen. Erratic breathing rhythmically raised his muscular chest, and Yugo swallowed feeling the heat spreading in his stomach.
Fuck me…He shook his head, restraining himself from attacking this body once again.
“Hey, you, wake up,” he said with deliberate roughness, not only to get Kuon’s attention but to clear his head as well.
Heavy lids obediently opened uncovering unfocused, muddy eyes. Dilated pupils bled into the irises, the whites crimson with blood.
“Do you know who I am?” Yugo asked in a low voice. Kuon closed his vacant eyes. Muscles on his face quivered as if a small movement caused him unbearable pain.
Yugo’s face relaxed, all emotions drained from its surface. He shook off the guy’s hand and stood up.He is half conscious, he doesn’t even see me. Of course he didn’t call for me.
“Please…” Bluish lips barely moved, but Yugo heard. Kuon winced, rolling on his side. Bloody lips parted chasing for air, his chest contracting with an absurd rhythm.
“Fuck me…” losing his mask of dispassion, Yugo hissed and plunked back on the bed. His palm brushed Kuon’s burning forehead, wiping the sweat. But contradicting to his move, his voice sounded tight with a hidden threat: “Don’t play with me, you hear?”
Under the touch of cool fingers, Kuon’s body relaxed. His features softened and rhythmical sound let Yugo know that Kuon had fallen into the world of dreams.
Yugo got up from the bed, his neurotic fingers restless, searching for something. Needing to keep them busy, he picked up a cigarette, squeezed it between dry lips. The red light caught the tip of the cigarette for a brief moment and died as he put the lighter down.
Confusion messed with his thoughts, and the furrow on his forehead deepened.
I had no idea this boy could do something like that…just assume he could cling to me… Yugo replayed the moment in his head but wasn’t satisfied. The feeling of being manipulated aggravated him.Who had Kuon called for? Whom doesn’t he want to let go? He doesn’t have a lover, does he? He isn’t playing with me, right?
He nibbled at the side of his thumb, thinking. Something began itching and scratching in the bottom of his heart as if a hungry mouse was embedded in his ribcage and now tried to break free. Once again, he sat on the bed, never taking his eyes off the sleeping face.
Kuon looked different without that hateful stare.Vulnerable.Yugo bent down, getting closer to his prisoner. Slim, long fingers slid down Kuon’s jawline, touching a well-defined collarbone.
“Kuon?” he whispered, but the young man lay unresponsive. His contorted features reflected the pain reigning inside.
Yugo’s gaze traveled down Kuon’s naked body, looking for damage. Several bruises painted Kuon’s torso purple. The one on his ribs gained a yellow outline. Yugo registered those without concern until his eyes met dried blood on Kuon’s inner thighs.
“Have I hurt you that bad?” Squeezing a cigarette between his teeth, he rolled Kuon on his stomach and carefully spread the buttocks apart. He cringed, examining a red and swollen anus. The dried blood, covering the surrounding inflamed skin, added to the illusion of an open wound.
Sucking the air through his teeth he frowned, looked away, and for several long seconds drilled the wall with his gaze. Getting up, he went to the drawer and took out a small bottle of Metronidazole. Having gone to the bathroom, he returned with a middle-sized basin and placed it on the floor in front of the bed.
He landed on the edge of the bouncy bed, hooked one arm around Kuon’s sweat-soaked neck, the other snaked under Kuon’s knees as he took the motionless body into his arms. Yugo’s shirt soaked through with Kuon’s sweat within seconds.
Nesting Kuon’s limp head against his shoulder Yugo drooped his ass between his knees right above the basin. His left arm curled around Kuon’s waist, holding him tight and close as another slipped between his legs.
His finger touched the feverish and pulsing flesh, probed its way into Kuon’s swollen insides. Incredible hotness and tightness squeezed his finger as Kuon sucked some air in. His head rolled to the side, his forehead bumped against Yugo’s shoulder.
“Easy,” Yugo said, and Kuon stilled.
Making sure there weren’t any deep injuries, he pulled out then brought the bottle to Kuon’s anus. Nudging the entrance, he guided the tip with his finger, opened Kuon’s sphincter, and infused the bottle’s contents inside.
“Umm…” a pained grimace invaded the bloodless, exhausted face, and a frail moan left Kuon’s dry lips.
Yugo stilled. An acute, uncontrolled urge to hear more, to see those pure, honest emotions exploded in his core. His heart leaped forward and crashed against his ribcage. Never taking his eyes off Kuon’s face, he squeezed the plastic bottle again, and a new portion of the drug, red with blood, that had cleansed Kuon’s insides poured out of the broken body. Weak fingers, searching for support, grabbed the collar of Yugo’s shirt as Kuon’s body trembled again.
“Hurts…” Kuon mumbled with bluish lips.
Yugo’s heart choked with blood.
“What’s my name?” he demanded, bending over the pale face.
