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I start to defend myself, and he holds his hand up again. “I’m not finished. When that friend asked if you were ready to go, you were still sticking your tongue down your girlfriend’s throat. You allowed your girlfriend to be rude to a friend you’ve known all your life. So, back to my original question: Do you think you were a good friend?”

I’m thrown a little, and all I can come back with is, “I said more than two words to her that night.” I know it’s weak, and as I think through that night, I realize he’s right. Every time I was going to say something to River, Amber pulled my attention away.

“I see you’re getting it, which brings me to my next few questions. Is Amber worth losing River? Because I can guarantee that Amber will never be okay with River being in your life, and you know River will not put up with Amber being rude to her.”

“I won’t lose her. We’re best friends,” I state confidently.

“Are you sure? Because if you invited me to hang out somewhere and then ditched me the whole night to hang out with someone else, I wouldn’t be too happy. That’s not what a friend does. I wouldn’t be so sure that you are not losing her. You didn’t see her on Saturday. You broke her, Auggie. She cried the whole way to your house. I’ve never seen her like that. It scared me. You know how strong she is, and she just wouldn’t stop crying until we got back to your house. As soon as we arrived, she went to bed. Our dads tried to ask what happened, but I didn’t tell them anything.”

“Why was she crying?” I ask, even though I already know the answer to my question.

“You really can’t be that stupid.” He gives me a pointed look. “Do you think it was easy watching you with another girl, and on top of that, you ignored her the whole night?” He shakes his head. “That’s all I’ve got to say. Get your crap together before you mess it up, and she decides she doesn’t want to come up anymore to hang out. Just remember there’s more than one way to lose her.”

My heart drops at his words. She easily could. That thought doesn’t sit well with me, especially since she hasn’t been answering my texts or calls.

Logan starts to head to his mom’s car, not waiting to hear the answers to his questions. He doesn’t need the answers. I do. Can I lose her? The only reason I’m going out with Amber is because of River. I didn’t really like talking to Amber, which is why we kiss all the time.

I made River cry.

Crap. Logan’s right. I must have really hurt her if she was crying. River doesn’t cry. No wonder my parents were mad at me. Man, I really screwed this up. I have to break up with Amber. If I have girlfriends, they need to be able to accept that River is in my life, and I can’t let them treat her like crap. I pull out my phone and send River another text that will probably go unanswered. I know after speaking with Logan how bad I messed up.

Auggie: I’m sorry

~~

It’s now Saturday, and it’s been a week since I last heard anything from River. I’ve continued to send texts and call, but she hasn’t responded to anything.

I know she’s still alive. My mom and Logan have confirmed it. I’ve checked her Facebook page, and she’s posted a few things. She just doesn’t want to talk to me. This is the longest we have ever gone without talking, and it’s killing me.

I broke up with Amber on Tuesday. She took it so well that Logan and I decided it might be better if we moved to another lunch table. It probably didn’t help that I did it in front of all our friends, right before the morning bell rang, which didn’t giveher time to do anything. By lunchtime, all kinds of rumors were flying around. I just hope her brother and I are still cool. I don’t want any fights on the team.

Reminder to self: no more dating teammates’ sisters. I feel like a weight has been lifted now that Amber and I are done. I didn’t realize how much of my time she was taking up.

Today, I’m finally talking to Mom about what happened at the bowling alley. She gently whacks me upside the head.

“What was that for?” I snap.

“For being an idiot. I knew something had happened. We all try to stay out of your friendship, but River’s like a daughter to me, and she’s supposed to be your best friend. Don’t you ever let one of these little hussies change how you treat her. I’m disappointed, Auggie. I heard her on Saturday. She didn’t want to go, but you talked her into it, and then you didn’t talk to her all night.” She shakes her head. “Don’t let it happen again. If I ever hear you let one of your girlfriends treat her like that again, I’m going to do worse than hit you upside the head.”

“I know, Ma. I know I messed up. I thought I was doing what she asked me to do, and I thought I was showing her I was a good boyfriend, but I forgot to show her I was a good friend.”

“Baby, just remember that friends come first. You and River will always have something special. Just remember to always be her friend first, okay?”

“I hear you. Now, if I can just get her to talk to me. I’ve been sending apologies. I even sent her a T-shirt that says, “I’m sorry I’m an idiot.” If that doesn’t get her to talk to me, I don’t know what will.”

“Just give her time. I think you really hurt her.”

~~

Logan and I are currently at the batting cages. Some of the other guys from the team are hanging out. We decided to take a break and grab something to eat.

I’m hoping that neither Amber nor Melissa shows up. Amber has been trying to get my attention all week, and since Amber is out of the picture, Melissa has been trying to weasel her way in. I can’t handle any drama from the girls tonight.

Logan and I are sitting at a picnic table, eating some nachos, when I get a notification from Facebook. Thinking maybe it’s River finally messaging me, I look at it. It shows she’s updated her profile picture. Her first profile picture was one of us a few years ago. She recently changed it to one of her and Logan, which hurt. I go to give Logan crap about their picture already being replaced, but my words die when I see a picture of her with another guy. A guy I don’t know.

My chest hurts seeing her with someone else, someone who she thought was important enough to put on her Facebook profile picture. He’s got her in a side hug, and they are both smiling at the camera. The only thing that makes me feel better is her smile. I know that smile. It’s not her real one.

“Do you know who this is?” I turn my phone so Logan can see it.