Page 28 of Desired By Mr Darcy
“You liked it!”
“Lizzy! If you do not stop, I shall leave!”
“Fine, fine. Will you fix my hair? I am sure Hill is too busy with Mama to attend either of us.”
Jane nodded, moving to stand behind Lizzy as she threaded through her tangled curls with her fingers.
“Just think, Lizzy. When we are married we will have our very own abigail! No more fighting for the mirror in the morning, or fumbling with one another’s buttons.”
“It will be luxury indeed. Oh, Jane, I shall miss you terribly. Promise you will write to me every week.”
“I would write to you every day if you asked me to, but I fear I am not as eloquent in my correspondence as you,” Jane smiled. “Besides, Lydia always said married women are too busy to write. I wonder what we shall be busy with.”
“Have you given any thought to what Mama told us the other day?”
“Of the wedding night? Yes, I must confess I have. I am quite concerned.”
“Why?”
“I have heard that it hurts dreadfully – and that there is blood.”
“I have heard that too,” Lizzy agreed. “Charlotte did not tell me much, but she certainly did not look as though their marriage was a pleasant undertaking. I cannot imagine it would be, with Mr Collins looming over you night after night.”
“Lizzy!” Jane clapped a hand over her mouth.
“Have I shocked you terribly, Jane? I am sorry! I just wish that we knew more about it. I suppose we must leave it to the men, but how do they know what to do? They have never been married before, and so they must have lain with other women. Have you thought of that?!”
“I do not care to! Oh, Lizzy, I do not like this conversation at all! I do not wish to think of Charles in that manner. He is a gentleman, and a most moral man. Mr Darcy, too. You cannot think they would take a mistress!”
“No, I believe gossip would have reached our ears about that.”
She could not stop thinking of what she had seen the night before, and her own ignorance of her body. Surely one must have had a teacher, to be able to achieve such a release alone?
“Whatever happens,” Jane continued, “I have every confidence that they will be most considerate.”
“Yes,” Lizzy echoed dully, “most considerate.”
They descended the stairs to breakfast, finding Fitzwilliam and Colonel Fitzwilliam sitting at the table speaking in low voices. At the ladies’ presence in the doorway, both men shot to their feet and welcomed them.
Lizzy took the spare seat across from her betrothed, and found that she could not quite look him in the eye after he enquired about the quality of her sleep. She felt her cheeks heat, the memory of what she had seen in the darkness last night overwhelming her.
“Are you well, Miss Elizabeth?” Colonel Fitzwilliam asked. “You seem a little flustered.”
“Quite well, thank you. And you?”
“Very well indeed. I hear that you two fine young ladies will be occupied for most of the day with modiste appointments. I do not know how you can bear such tedium.”
Lizzy smiled.
“I must confess, I have a weakness for new clothes. I know it is terribly vain of me, but I cannot help it. As one of five, it is a rarity indeed to have something all to myself.”
“I am sure my cousin will make sure Mrs Darcy has all of the new clothes she could desire,” Colonel Fitzwilliam laughed, helping himself to more toast and taking a hearty bite.
“You must have all that you need,” Fitzwilliam told her, his eyes meeting hers.
“Thank you. In truth, I will not require much. I have a good deal of dresses that are perfectly good and…”
“No, no, certainly not!” her mother’s voice startled her. “You shall be a married lady; it would not do to roam Derbyshire in tattered rags.”
