Page 126 of Melt For Us, Daddy
Squirming a bit in his seat, he lifted his gaze to meet hers. “You’re going to be mad when I tell you.”
“I might. But I promise to listen to whatever you have to tell me, even if it upsets me. Okay?”
“Okay. Um. It’s just… when it was just us at the safe house, it was easier to convince myself that wanting this, wanting you the way I do wasn’t wrong. But then we were at the club and all the other guys are Daddies and it just sort of felt like confirmation that everything I was taught was actually the way things are supposed to be.”
Fuck. Her poor, sweet baby boy.
Rounding the coffee table, she perched on the edge, keeping her gaze locked squarely on his. “And now? How are you feeling about this? About us?”
“Better. Killian told me I wasn’t paying very good attention if I thought all the men at the club were Doms.”
She couldn’t help but smile at that. “He’s right. But that’s okay. It was a lot to take in all at once. I’m sorry I put you in that position, baby boy. I should have listened to my gut and put my foot down about you going in there so soon.”
“How is it your fault when Holden and I talked you into it? I wanted to do this, Cordelia. I needed to do it, to know that I was doing something more than just waiting. That’s not on you.”
“It is, because you’re mine and I didn’t protect you the way I should have.”
“Oh, please.” Carrying a small tray with three cups of steaming water and an assortment of tea bags, Ivy rolled her eyes. “If any of the guys said that about their babygirls, you’d be the first one to rake them over the coals for being misogynistic asshats.”
“This is different. And unless you want to spend the rest of this conversation standing in the corner, you won’t roll your eyes at me again, little girl.”
“Sorry, Daddy.” Clearing her throat, Ivy nudged the tray toward Jacob. “What kind of tea do you want, honey?”
“I don’t know. I don’t really drink tea.”
“Hmm. Do you like mint?”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Perfect.” Ripping open one of the packages, she dropped the bag into the water and handed him the cup. “Let it steep for a few minutes and give it a try. If it’s not sweet enough I can get you some sugar.”
While Ivy made their tea, Cordelia returned her attention to their boy. “Setting blame aside for now, the point is, I understand we asked a lot of you tonight. And I understand why you reacted the way you did. That being said, you owe Ivy an apology for the way you spoke to her. No matter how upset you are, that’s no excuse for lashing out like that.”
To his credit, he looked suitably chastised as he dipped his head and peeked up at Ivy through his lashes. “I’m really sorry, Ivy. I shouldn’t have blown up at you like that. I didn’t mean it.”
“I know, honey. I forgive you.”
At that, his entire face seemed to light up. “Thanks, Ivy.”
“Was there anything else upsetting you, Jacob?” Cordelia asked as he sipped his tea and made a face that had Ivy giggling quietly as she dropped a sugar cube in his cup.
“That was mostly it. My own insecurities, I guess, wrapped up in wondering if my mom was right. If I’ve really damned myself to hell for the things I’ve done with you.”
Emotion lodged in her throat as she leaned forward. “I know there’s nothing I can say to convince you how wrong they are. But I can tell you I don’t think a God who supposedly loves His creation as deeply as the church claims He loves us could possibly condemn you to hell for loving differently than what those small-minded assholes say is right.”
“That’s kind of what Killian said. He said that if he had children, he’d just want them to be happy and he believes that’s what God wants for us.”
God bless Killian O’Rourke. Never thought I’d be saying that. “I agree with Killian.” Or that. “But what really matters is how you’re feeling about things.”
“Good… and still kind of bad at the same time.”
“How do you mean?”
“I’m feeling better about the stuff I talked to Killian about. Because I think he’s right, too. I don’t really believe God hates me because I had sex outside of marriage or I’m in a relationship with two women. Honestly, after watching the news, it seems like He’s got bigger things to worry about.”
God, she was fucking proud of how far he’d come in such a short amount of time. “Agreed. So what are you still feeling bad about?”
Color rose to his cheeks. “Yelling at Ivy. It wasn’t nice and I embarrassed you both in front of your friends. They probably all hate me and think I’m awful now. And I don’t blame them.”
