Page 13 of Frankie and the Fed
White lace.
I blink.
There is nothing here that I can use. If I want to kill him, I have to take the gun from him. I need a plan.
After I finish eating, he takes the tray, puts it outside the room, and returns. He’s not done with me yet.
He comes close and sniffs loudly. “You stink.”
I remain silent, not daring to raise my head and meet his gaze, afraid to see the cruelty in his eyes. It seems as if his excitement threshold is increasing. He gets a kick out of my suffering.
“Go take a shower.”
I look up. Is he suggesting I clean up? I want to wash the disgust and blood off myself, to feel like a human again. But then I understand why he wants this, and I freeze. I’d rather be dirty than have him touch me again.
He takes the gun out of his belt and points it at me. “No nonsense. Get up and get in the shower.”
I look at the barrel of the gun and realize I’m no longer afraid. I no longer have a reason to live. No wonder he keeps me weak, with not enough food. No wonder he hits me and breaks my bones. There’s no way I could take the gun away from him in my condition.
I try to stand, but my legs refuse to comply. I lean against the bed, moaning.
“Well? I don’t have all day.”
I want to jump him. Maybe he’ll shoot me, and this nightmare will be over. But I limp to the bathroom, hugging my ribs. Every part of my body screams with pain. But the despair is the worst. I can bear the physical pain. I survived rape in the past. But revenge has pulled this beast into another world of cruelty, one that I thought only existed in nightmares.
I used to have hope. I hoped to escape. I had something to live for. What do I have left to live for now? There is no way out of this cycle of torture. And I’d rather die than continue to live this way.
He punches me in the face, and my vision blurs again. I trip and fall to my knees.
“Move already.” He grabs my arm and yanks my limp body back into a standing position, drags me into the shower, and turns the tap on full blast. I wince as the cold water hits my body like needles of ice, washing away the evidence of what he’s done to me.
I stand there, staring as the trail of blood washes from me. I’m still bleeding. I knew he injured me. But when was the last time I had my period? I don’t remember. Well, it doesn’t matter whether it’s my period or from an injury. Nothing will stop him.
I can feel his eyes wandering over my body. I don’t understand how he could possibly be aroused by this, by the signs of violence, the scratches, the bruises, and the blood. But it’s clear that he is. His gaze oozes lust. He’s a psychopath. I suddenly understand. The thrill was always there, just beneath the surface. During the previous two years in his hell, I’d barely scraped the thin covering and revealed the true monster beneath his facade.
“Enough.” Michael’s firm voice interrupts my train of thought.
I turn off the water and step outside, trembling, not sure if it’s because of the cold, the fear, or both.
He hands me a towel, and I wrap myself in it, hiding behind it as if it were steel armor. The water was indeed freezing, but I’ve gained a few ounces of energy. Clean and with a full stomach, I feel like a human again.
“How long are you going to keep me here?”
He raises an eyebrow. “Until the interest in you subsides.”
There’s interest in me? Is someone looking for me? I straighten.
“I don’t know what’s going through your head, but don’t get your hopes up. I’m your legal guardian. No one can take you away from me. I have you, and I have documents that prove you’re sick.”
The air leaves me in a long breath. I don’t know how he does it, how he reads my mind so easily.
He pulls the towel from me. I try to grab it, but it only irritates him, and he pulls harder, knocking me onto the floor.
His eyes light up. He picks me up by my hair, and I scream as the hair threatens to tear from my scalp. The more I scream, the more he pulls. I fall silent, trying to stifle my sobs. I will not give him the satisfaction of subduing me.
“Put me in your mouth,” he commands. “Suck it.”
He hasn’t asked me for it since I got here.
