Page 69 of Vicious Arrangement
He runs in, the stupid giant dog following, and Josh throws his arms around my legs, dousing the flames.
Josh looks up at me. “We saved you a sprinkles cake!”
I pick him up and hug him close, kissing his cheek as he grabs my hair and laughs with glee. Then he cuddles in, and I hold the kid close, his little heart beating fast against me as I drop a kiss on his soft hair. “Did you have fun?”
“Yes, but we missed you, Noah. I was sad.” Then he looks at me and grins. “But I’m happy now you’re here. Want to watch Space Zoids with me? It’s the best movie.”
I almost laugh. Whatever a space zoid is sounds terrible, but I’d watch it with him in a heartbeat if… if I didn’t need to get the fuck out of there.
Away from the situation. Away from my performance.
Away from Aria.
I set him down and crouch. “You watch for me. I have to go back to work because I left something important there.” Like my dignity. “But when I get back…”
Josh nods and rushes off. I turn and leave fast, storming back to the elevator, that immediately opens as I just step out.
The kid will be passed out when I get back.
But I can’t stay.
I won’t.
And without a word to Asher or my wife, I leave.
I lean backon the corner stool at the bar of Every Second Sunday. I’m sad about not spending time with Josh, but I couldn’t… the kid would’ve fallen asleep, and anyway, I didn’t want to be there with them and the specter of my irrational behavior.
But I’m pissed off too.
They were… fucking happy. Touching.
I don’t turn into Neanderthal Man when a girl I’m banging clicks with someone else. It doesn’t happen. I don’t date. But if I’m with a lady I’m fucking and someone laughs with her, whatever.
So I’m not sure why it’s hooking into my flesh now. I really don’t know what the fuck happened at the penthouse.
I drain my glass, and as it’s Monday and not overly busy, Jace, tonight’s bartender, comes over, fills me up and moves on to serve someone else.
Shit.
Walking into my home and seeing Asher all over Aria flipped a switch in me, and I flipped out.
In all the time I’ve known him, I’ve never once thought he was putting moves on someone. I’ve also never put hands on him or he on me.
I’m being fucking unreasonable, I was fucking unreasonable. I was a grade-A ass.
Especially since I know and trust nothing is going on between them. But…
Jesus, seeing them along, laughing like they shared their own private joke, Aria laughing in a way she never has with me—not that I’ve given her a reason—and having fun drives me insane.
Right or wrong.
And I’m sure this lands on the wrong side.
The worst part is it’s my fault for deliberately not being home for dinner, but it doesn’t make it any easier, especially when I factor in the joy on Joshy’s face when he saw me.
Thing is, I didn’t go in part, because after last night and this morning, the closeness, that extra level to the sex—like it was intimate in a way I still don’t get, like it stripped me bare beyond clothes—scared me. I couldn’t handle more of that, and failing if that seismic shift was just on me.
So I stayed at work, avoiding the threat of getting closer to Aria, pretending to work and getting nothing done.
