Page 44 of Cowboy Seeks Husband
He closed his eyes and imagined telling her about noodling. She’d be simultaneously horrified and terribly amused.
His eyes burned with tears. She had to be okay. And not just now. She had to be forever-okay and be his mom for a long time to come. He had no one else. “I love you,” he whispered, sending the emotion to her over the miles.
Roan shook himself and opened his eyes only to find Walker standing behind him.
“Again,” he said, pointedly, “with the private conversation.”
Walker gave him a bewildered look. “It’s just you. And your reflection.”
“Well. Yeah. I was giving myself a pep talk.”
“Right. Well, it’s good to love yourself. So…okay then.”
A cameraman appeared behind them, but since they were being watched by two ever-present mounted cameras as well and didn’t seem to be doing anything really interesting, he left again.
An awkward silence fell, and Roan remembered he wasn’t wearing any pants yet. He gestured at his lower half. “I guess we should stop meeting like this, right?”
Walker’s eyes danced with amusement. “Oh, I don’t know, I kind of like—”
“There you are. We need to film some preliminary scenes.” John glanced at Roan, then did a double take. “Ah, the good old accidental nakedness strategy. I like it, Roan. Well, I’d personally like it more if you were a woman, but whatever works for Walker here is good for the show.” He turned to Walker. “I told you, sharks, all of them. Even the cute ones.”
“That’s not—” Roan began, but John was already leading Walker away. Roan snapped his mouth shut. It didn’t matter one bit what Walker thought, as long as he kept Roan on the show a little longer. He needed the money for his mom’s treatment and nothing else was important—not their “vibe” earlier, not the flipping sensation in his stomach whenever he saw Walker, and not how Walker made his palms sweat. Nothing mattered but his mother’s health.
Stewing madly, he had to redo his tie three times. The suit was nice though, a soft charcoal gray with the faintest pinstripe. And you know what? Chad could go suck a lemon, Roan was wearing his fake glasses. They could be like armor. Something to hide behind.
He had the feeling he was going to need it.
He needed itall right. As an armor against boredom. He suppressed his millionth yawn of the evening as Andy, Molly, and John conferred about more reaction shots.
“Attention!” Molly called. “Everyone look this way, and on three you clap your hands and cheer! One…”
“God, I want to be eliminated before I die from this inane crap,” Chad muttered in Roan’s ear. Then he let out a whoop, while Roan floundered on the “three.”
“Now,” Molly said, sounding like her teeth had been glued together. “Let’s try that again, without the gaping fish impression.” She glared at Roan.
“Thanks a lot,” Roan mumbled, elbowing Chad softly in the side. Chad only grinned.
“…Three!”
Roan clapped his hands and cheered. A little. He hated this. Beside him Ben seemed to hate it even more. He’d fist-pumped once, then stuffed his hands back into his pockets, ruining the lines of his suit.
“Okay, let’s continue with the eliminations. Can the final three step forward while the others go back to their marks please,” John called out.
Roan, Antoine, and Bellamy took their spots in the center of the room, while the others formed a semi-circle behind them. Makeup fussed a bit with Luke’s hair and then Andy gave the go-ahead.
“Yes, we’ve already said goodbye to one contestant tonight, and while it’s only our first elimination night, I have to make an important and unexpected announcement,” Luke said, like he was picking up in the middle of a sentence—and for all Roan knew he was. They’d been filming back and forth so much he had no clue what time it was, how much champagne he’d had, or why he was even there anymore. “…Extra elimination tonight.”
“Wait, what?”
The words rang hollow in Roan’s ears. It had to be him. Why else would they bother? Maybe Antoine was right and the entire ‘date’ with Walker had been a setup for drama when they eliminated him tonight. Maybe there’d been no ‘vibe’ between them at all. This was a fucking TV show. It was all a game. He tried to wipe his sweaty palms surreptitiously on his pants, but the cameras were aimed relentlessly on the final three awaiting their fate. There was only one horseshoe left and the only thing that gave Roan any hope at all was Antoine’s dumbstruck face beside him.
“That was a good reaction,” Molly called out. She smiled that barracuda grin that looked so strange on her sweet face. “But I want to do it again. On three, everyone react. One…”
Roan didn’t even have to try. He couldn’t seem to get the horrified look off his face. Go home in the first week? Oh, God. Not only would he have nothing to show for it monetarily, but the humiliation…
“Great. Some solidarity amongst the final three contestants, please?” Molly said, motioning at them. “Hold hands or hug or something.”
Roan swallowed hard, and he didn’t even shudder when he felt Antoine’s equally sweaty palm slip into his.
