Page 19 of Juke
“I’m scared,” I whispered. “I don’t care how long it’s been. I still remember what it felt like.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “The way he looked at me, the way he spoke to me… like I was his to break.”
“Girl…” Mel’s voice came out low and warm. “You don’t owe that nigga shit. He damn sure don’t deserve to breathe the same air as you, let alone walk free.”
“You need a plan,” Nic said.
“I know,” I whispered. “But what kind of plan do you make when you don’t know where to start or who to turn to?”
“You got us,” Kasha said. “And you got Juke.”
“That’s the part that’s confusing.” I swallowed.
“What’s confusing?” Mel asked.
“Rashad. The way he looks at me sometimes. The way he just… shows up. But he doesn’t make any moves. He doesn’t flirt, or try anything—just sits there and lingers around like I’m his job.”
“Maybe that is him making his move,” Nic said. “Maybe loyalty is his love language.”
I let out a shaky laugh. “He must love hard as hell then.”
“He does,” Kasha countered. “You can see it on his face.”
“But what am I supposed to do about it?” I asked. “What if I say something and it ruins everything? Or worse… what if I leaninto it and I lose myself again? I can’t afford to hand my heart to the wrong man. Not twice.”
“Then don’t hand it,” Mel said. “Let him earn it.”
“And in the meantime,” Nic added, “don’t play about you. If you’re scared, say it. If you need us, say it. If you want that man… say it. Closed mouths don’t get kissed.”
“I’ll think about it.” I simpered.
“You’re always thinking,” Nic said. “Maybe it’s time you acted.”
As I listened to their advice, my mind drifted to Rashad. That man moved quiet, but his presence always echoed. It lingered like heat from a fire that never went out. He didn’t ask me deep questions, or force me to talk. He just showed up and stayed close. He made sure I felt safe in a world that never gave a damn if I was.
“You good over there?” Mel asked. “You zoned out on us.”
“I was just thinking.”
“About that man.” Kasha smirked. “We ain’t slow.”
I rolled my eyes and shifted on the bed. “Y’all are so annoying.”
“You love us, though,” Mel said, “almost as much as Nic love keeping secrets.”
Nic scoffed. “What I do?”
“You still ain’t told Buck,” Kasha asked.
“Told Buck what?” I asked, brows pulling together.
“Her ass over there pregnant as hell,” Mel blurted.
“Bitch, don’t be putting that in the air.” Nic snapped.
“Maybe you shouldn’t be putting yo’ legs in the air.” Kasha clapped back.
“Y’all doing the most,” Nic grumbled. “I just been feeling off… that’s it.”
“Off how?” Mel asked.
